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Vicki Gunvalson

Great Sadness

Vicki shares how hard it was to watch this season and her disappointment over the party drama.

June 5, 2011

Well here we are at the end of the season of The Real Housewives of Orange County. When I look back and reflect on this season, it brings me great sadness. Starting this season’s filming in August of 2010, I had no idea what would unfold in my personal life. I guess that’s why they call it reality TV.

I was so pleased with how my backyard turned out for the fall party. I had planned it a few months before and really couldn’t cancel it due to my personal issues, so I decided to go ahead with it anyway. I had no idea how difficult it was going to be for me when the day actually came without Donn being there. I had never hosted a party without Donn, and it made me very sad. When my makeup artist was trying to put my makeup on, it became almost comical, because every time she would get my eyes finished, I started crying again and she had to keep fixing it.

It was nice that the girls came up to the bathroom to rally me downstairs to see everyone. I don’t know if I could have gone down on my own without some nudging. Tamra definitely knows how emotional it is to go through a separation, and she’s been a great friend to me through all of this. Thank you, Tamra, I love you!

My brother Billy flew in from Chicago to support me and be there, which was a huge thing for me. The support of my family and close friends has been great, and any of you that are or have gone through a divorce knows how important it is.

Next:
Filled With Sadness
Filled With Sadness Vicki shares that Briana is back in the hospital. June 5, 2011209 Comments The Real Housewives of Orange County Season 6 / Episode 12 / Vicki Gunvalson

Comments

161 Comments

she to sexey for her own good\ smile sexey

Vicki,
I wouldn't profess to even begin to know you as TV shows can be very manipulative, however from what I have seen you have a lot of issues you need to deal with. You come across as jealous, nasty and spiteful. You seem to have a need to put others down in order to make yourself look and feel better, but I'm sure deep down it just doesn't work at the end of the day you have to live with your conscience if you have one? You always appear very surprised when someone retaliates towards you and you never seem to think you are wrong, it is always the other person.
With regard to the relentless working I'm sorry but I don't believe it, nobody needs to work the hours you portray that you work either it is all a show to create an image for yourself that you think will impress others or you are just not very good at time management and delegation as any good business person should be?
Deep down I think you are a very insecure, needy person which is very sad for you. You could learn a lot from your beautiful daughter Briana, she is intelligent, generous, kind and compassionate, don't ever worry about that girl with a beautiful nature like that she will always do well.
Vicki, I don’t mean to judge you I don’t know you and my comments are not aimed to hurt you, rather to make you stop and think, nobody if perfect me included but I try to be a good person. Just remember “It is nice to be important but it is far more important to be nice!” Try it sometime I’m sure it will make you feel better about yourself?
I wish you the best of luck with your life and I hope one day you can be contented with your lot!

Lu Lu

Hey Vicki
I hope things are better for you now.
You are by far the most intelligent lady in the series.
Will there be a no. 7?
Don't forget that Jeana was always a good friend to you.
Ria

Hey Girlfriend you are the bomb Those two wanna-b barbies trying to put you down , Lady you have class and I can tell you both wanna-bs will not last a tenth of married time that you did !You are for real you made a mistake on how you handled the divorce but you are real enough to say so you are a beautiful and classy lady. Maybe you could remind the two bimbos it's a reality show or maybe they don't know what reality means??? You go girl!!!!!

Vicky please Tamara is not a good person, so what she went thru a divorce, she is a mean girl and the way she treated Jeanna at your party was so over the top, A TRUE FRIEND WOULD HAVE WAITED AND TALKED TO JEANNA AAFTER IF SHE GAVE A DARN ABOUT YOUR AND WHAT YOU WERE GOING THUR. Also you stated on the Andy show you had no work done (cosmetic) YEAH RIGHT YOU CAN SEE IT VICKY YOU LOOK LIKE YOU LOST SERVERAL YEARS DO NOT ALLOW PEOPLE TO BELIEVE DON'S GONE AND AM FREE, YOU PLAYED A MAJOR ROLE IN THAT FROM WHAT I HAVE BEEN SEEING ON THE SCREE FOR THE LAST FEW YEARS , YOU ARE ALSO A MEAN GIRL GREW UP WAATCH TAMARA

I have watched you since episode 1. You are a very level headed, focused individual, perhaps with too much focus in some areas and not enough in others. Not knowing all the details about your divorce, that is how I would sum it up. You are a great person, but you are being taken advantage of. Tamra has screwed you over before and she will again. She is taking advantage of your vulnerability to meet with her own agenda. Please don't let her take you and your reputation down. I mean, think about it, who else on the show would she have to share screen time with, if not you? You are so vulnerable right now that you will listen to any of her crap, and unfortunately, believe her. Stay away from her or you will have nothing but even more pain coming and soon.

I wish you well. All will turn out for the best.

Good Luck Vicki and thank you for welcoming us into your home.

Vicki, why do you have different one set of standards when it comes to Tamra and another for everyone else?? what would your opinion have been if it was Gretchen and Slade in the tub. would you have said it was just two people in love?? doubt it. I think your argument was weak when Gretchen asked you why you didn't give her support when Jeff was dying...you didn't know her very well?? when I had cancer, people I barley knew sent me well wishes and cards. she was another human being in pain...you said that you will always be on Tamra's side because she has never let you down. have you forgotten last season?? she talked about you and never defended you. what would you call that??? be as smart in your personal life as you are in your professional life. I feel bad for you and Don. there is always two sides to every story and no one is 100% guilty or not guilty but with the new love in your life, make different choices, learn from your mistakes.

I have been a fan of the OC Housewives from the beginning. I have always been a fan of yours and admire your success and business skills. As a widow I am now going to have to go back to work and wish I could have your business skill. I am sorry you and Donn didn't make it. I really think the show is going very trash tv mostly because of Tamara and I hope you don't follow her example after marriage break up. Stay classy and good luck.

You have been my favorite housewife since the first season. I love your fun loving attitude about life, but also how seriously you take your career and family. I have always felt like you were the only one of the women who wasn't interested in starting drama, even though you got blamed for it a lot. Like you, I have always been one to speak my mind and the truth, but sometimes people just can't take it. I am truly sorry to hear about your divorce, but wish you a future of happiness and love!

Vicky: I got what you wished for. Do not feel sorry for you!!

Hi Vicky, I love you on the show, I really think the other girls look up to you, its the men who feel threaten, you work hard, you have opinions you are youre "own" women. I look up to! and I love youre energy! I look forward to se you on the show. Hugs from Yvette Sweden

Vicki, I wish you the very best and I pray that things go well for you and your family. Keep your chin up & know that things will get better. You're a strong person, you will get through this.

Vicki, I love you ..You are my favorite housewife and you looked great at your fall party even though i heard your make-up had to be reapplied several times...i hope you and your family are able to get through this hard time and its a shame its on national television...you are in my prayers and hopefully you will still continue to be on the show next time around xoxo

Oh wow Vicki hay I spell my name with an i also! LOL hay Ive been through two divorces and thought the last one would last forever! So sorry to hear and finally see these episodes, hate to se you cry, but you cant help it,it like a water fountain that JUST Won't stop! We get it, and we are there for you spiritually-mentally-and in our hearts.Please don't go off the air though you are the last of the last of the mo-he-cans, so we need you to stay and lets us watch you grow in to some thing else, free from drama, no more punt words from Donn-dont get me wrong we all loved him too-but he was changing, not you-you are just a work-aholic-LOL,LOL see you next episode!Love ya lady

Dear Vicki,
I am so sorry that your marriage to Don has ended! He is a good man and cares a great deal for you! It is very visible on the show what he was on this season!!! You are an amazing woman! I think you that you lost site of your marriage as your career got going. Not there is anything wrong with that but you get out of something what you put in! I hope that if there is a chance for counseling maybe you take it! After the scare of the ulcers reevaluate life! It is very short. My husband served his country and has had cancer and it came back with a mission to kill him but he beat it! Stop and enjoy the fruits of your labor! It is okay to live! Don't miss out on living for your work! YOur kids are amazing! I think that you should surround yourself with true friends and not the other ladies especially now! I wish nothing but the best for you!
All of the ladies are toxic and will just add more stress to your life!!! Best wishes and I hope that Brianna is better too! Please keep us posted on her as well! She is a great woman!

Dearest Vicki You are so loved. Please know that,and take comfort and peace from it. There is love all around you, Ive seen it from wayyyy over here. Please take sometime for yourself. Let the grieving process work, mourn the loss of your marriage. Dont rush back to work, or try to be supermom to those grown children, take time for VICKI. Maybe you should do an Eat,Pray,Love thing of your own? lol MUCH LOVE AND MANY PRAYERS TO YOU AND YOURS!!!!

Vicki, i'm so sorry for what your're going through, you're strong and beautiful. You'll get throught your divorce, who knows maybe you and Don will reconcile, hopefully, you seem to be good for each other. Maybe just slowww dowwwn a bit, money can make you or break you but it's not everything. Best of Luck

I agree with brightwings comment. Im very sorry you are dealing with the sadness of a divorce but you contradicted yourself so much by saying you couldnt find the time to spend with Donn but you always seemed to find the time for "girl" days, nights, and trips without him. I wish you the best and hope Donn will find someone who appreciates him. A good man like that is hard to find. You will soon see this.

Vicki
I've always liked you, though I don't understand you much.. especially this season. Very disappointing to see that your friendship with Tamra has rubbed off on you. She's deceitful and mean-spirited and jealous, you don't need that kind of energy around you and affecting your other friendships & relationships. You should wise up about that one. My heart goes out to your kids and Donn. Wishing you peace.

I think you and Don would still be together if you hadn't been on the show. I think he's a good man. Hope you all will become friends again one day.

I just want to say that I'm sorry for you and Don. I think you both could have done something to fix it but that might just be that I really loved you as a couple. I wish both of you lots of love, happiness, and health!

Hi Vicki, I just started watching the show this season but you are truly my favorite. To me, you are the easiest to relate to out of all the other women. I love and respect your work ethic, you've done a lovely job raising your children, and I admire your strength and dedication in doing what you feel is right. I get your frustration towards other moms who don't work but yet have nannies to take care of and basically raise their children. I chose to leave my profession to raise my kids who are still very young and I take my role as a "stay at home mom" very seriously. I also understand your drive to "have it all" but it concerns me what the stress of trying to accomplish that can do to a person. Ones threshold for stress can only hold so much. My husband and I, not too long ago, did feel like we had it all. A beautiful home in the bay area, a vacation home in Tahoe and a flourishing business here in southern california. A year and a half ago my husband who has a very high threshold for stress finally reached his limit and cracked. He had a major psychotic break and never fully recovered. As a result, we lost everything...everything. I, myself am now going through divorce proceedings as the changes in my husband became to much to bear. I still struggle with the guilt of letting my children down,the failure, and all those questions of whether it's really the right thing to do. In the end and in my heart I know it's right. We, as women, struggle with putting ourselves first. It's just our nature. I wish you peace, balance and happiness Vicki...you're a good person.

Hope you are in good place now spiritually.

Vicki,
Like I said to Tamra, I am so happy that you two have each other to stick by one another. You both have a great strong friendship that will last forever. I admit that I've been and fan of yours since season one and have watched you and don together. I've personally met don myself at foxs on the Colorado river and honestly he wasn't to friendly so I could see how possibly your work became more important to you. As I continued to watch I noticed how strong but yet emotional perso you are. I can relate to that because me and you both come off to be big bad and strong (which is very positive) but when we hurt we hurt very hard as well as when we love we love hard. I am so sad to see how much pain you have been through this season. Micheal and Brianna will always be there with you and now that your reality has changed all you can do as you approach your golden years of life is to make yourself happy.
Best of luck and you are always in my prayers!!
With so much love,
Emma Schall (age :17)

Like everything Good and classy! Sometimes it's best to know when to stop.. You've given much of your best to this. I think it's taken a real toll on you and your whole family. God Bless

My heart goes out to you this season. You're a blessed woman with your great career and the two wonderful children you have brought up. I hope you can find happiness in your love life and don't settle for less :)

Hey Mz. Vicki
Sorry for what is happening in your world.. I know what u are going thru,due to the fact i have been in your shoes. I put work before my gf's and family. I had to make sure i was making money so i could have what I wanted and i could play very hard. If you step back some you will see Don was always there and you did make him second. I did the same and it took me losing great people in my life to know I hurt alot of people. We do keep moving forward but its a lonely trip. At 41 I had a beautiful son,and i had to slow down alot ..Was a stay home dad for 3yrs of his life but his mother and I are no longer a cpl due to i put work for her. I really hope you and Don can fix things, but if not please make sure you two remain friends and make sure the grown kids remember that Don has been their father and he always will be . Im 1800 miles from my son now due to work but i do see him 2-3 times a month. Keep your head up ,keep given us your beautiful but so sexy smile.
Love you WOO WOO

Bobby B.

YOU ARE THE GREATEST!!!!!!!!!! WOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOO TEAM VICKI TAMRA AND PEGGY!!!!!!!!!!

I love how you wanted to make sure your children were still in touch with Donn, and didn't pull the evil, "take sides" like most adults in divorce so childlishly make their kids/families do. Shows true class! I wish you the very best, the first hardworking housewife, and one who can look herself in the mirror and say she is being herself. I'm sorry for all of your sadness....looking forward to another WHOOO HOOO very soon!

I admire your drive. Before people judge they need to realize, this is an edited TV show, they show what will get ratings. Your personal life is just that... your personal life! Thank you for sharing what you have and showing woman that we too can be strong, with or without a man. We all hope to have a man that can handle a strong woman as well as support our careers. Sometimes in life that just doesn’t happen. I wish you the best, and Don as well! Thank you for another entertaining season!

Best of luck Vicki. Things are tough right now but will get better. I wish you and Don much happiness.

Dear Vicki Gunvalson,

I am unsure if you will ever read this post but just in case here goes: After 26 years of marriage my husband and I renewed our vows. It took a year to plan and many friends and close family member helped. What I found out after the fact is that in some cases men and women see this ceremony as a time to look at the current "marriage" and upgrade the future. What I am getting at is, it is not always a good thing to open the contract up ! My husband at the time began to compare the "old" me, 21 year old me. He began to find fault ( on our honeymoon cruise) with my weight, hair and how I talked. Nothing i did was right. It was the beginning of the end of our marriage. Its taken me 3+ years to get my "self" back and the divorce in the court. Just sharing..don't renew! Keep the old contract going and celebrate that!!!

God Bless you Vicki and your family. Sorry you had your drama at your party that should have been handled in private not at a party that took you months to plan and I am sure expensive. For your "friend" Tamara to disrupt it was totally immature. Keep your head up high and carry on.

Vicky-
I can only imagine the pain you are going through with your divorce. Have faith that God is watching over you and helping you get through this difficult time. Your a good woman, mother and wife. You will find happiness with someone who truely deserves you. Thank God for your kids, you did a great job raising them! You should be very proud!
Take Care and God Bless

Vicki ,
Im so sorry you are going through this. Ive been a fan since the show started, and just loved your fun spirit, work ethic and love for your children. During the seasons, I noticed a big change and really didn't like you for awhile. Now I know that you were in a struggle, and expectedly your actions and distance from the group reflected that. I applaud your decision and mourn your loss also. I know this wasn't an easy decision.

Tamra said one thing right, about having one shot at life. I know she is your true friend and that is great, and hopefully she is getting better to. I do feel though she has a tedneancy to need to apologize for alot. Which is usually void by her next action. She lives in a glass house throwing stones. I understand her being upset with Jeana, however, she talks about EVERYONE! What comes around goes around.

Prayers up and out for you and your family!

vicki you don't love donn the way it's necessary to have a marriage be successful. you and donn are BOTH to blame for your marriage not working.

Vickie, my heart broke for you last night. You are the very very best and the
classiest lady on the show. You are a wonderful
friend and you certainly are a wonderful Mother--You have achieved a lot and I
can tell you really care about your employees. You speak the truth and do not
stir up drama. I wish you the very very best--you make the show real
and I love what you bring to the show. Hold your head high--I know
great things are coming your way---You do have it all and you are a wonderful
Mother--Team Vicky

Hi Vicki,

I know it's hard dealing with all the media and side stories about your personal life. Just know that... "This too shall pass ". You are a hard working woman but it seems you are harder on yourself than anyone else. Take some time.. just relax, have a vacation or just sit and be still in the presence of God.

May God continue to bless you.

i hope things get better for you. i think you were too quick to take tamra's side and believe her version of the fight with jeana. i hope you reconsidered when you saw the episode. very clearly tamra started it all. throwing wine....really classy tamra. tamra doesn't have enuf heart to be anyone's friend. she is only into herself. you can do better.

Vicki,
First off, I would like to say how sorry I am for your divorce. They say that divorce is similar to having a loved one pass away. Having been through divorce myself, I would have to agree. Like you said, "I want it all". YOU DESERVE IT ALL! I would like to thank you for being so REAL on the show. I'm sure it's extremely challenging to have everyone commenting on your every move, but I think you've kept it classy. The one thing that I admire the most about you is your willingness to admit your faults publicly. It takes a lot of courage to say that you take responsibility for hurting your husband, and not being present in the marriage. Nobody else on the show has really been open like you have been. By doing so, you've touched many hearts out there, as these are some of the problems of the real housewives all around the country. You've made yourself more human to us, is what I'm trying to say, I think. I wish you nothing but happiness and love for your life. It will come without a doubt. You are a doer and not a watcher, for sure. I hope that both you and your daughter have the blessing of good health, as you've both gone through some issues. To me, you are of the most wealthy people alive, if you have your health. Also, thank you for sending the message to everyone about hard work making success. This has really gone to the dogs in this country. Very sad. Take care and much love. your fan rm

I'm sorry for the pain you must be going through. Your party was lovely, and I'm sorry that Tamra ruined it by behaving so badly with no regard at all as to how you were feeling. She didn't have your back last Season when Simon treated you the way he did, and obviously, she doesn't have your back this Season, either. I guess Tamra's concerns will always be first.

Vicky,
I can relate, you do deserve to be loved, successful, and have it all! I was in a marriage for 27 years that went by way of a divorce just recently. I am a successful business executive who has raised two amazing sons and although my husband was an amazing dad, with an incredible sense of humor and caring personality. It just wasn't working for us, because there was not much affection or passion in our marriage. Life is too short to not have that in your life. Go for it all. You are beautiful and full of life, I'm sure God has a great plan for you! Trust me Donn will be fine. My ex was engaged less than 6 months after we split and I'm OK with it. It's time to move on.

Sorry for your heavy heart at this time in your life. Remember, to look at all of the positive aspects of your life, and keep love in your heart. You are a strong woman!

I thought Tamra's choice for giving Jeanna the letter was tasteless. She should have had enough self-restraint to wait and give it to her at another time or paid a process server to deliver it. She chose to run her agenda rather than respect a party you were already struggling to orchestrate. Bad form for her.

Although I am very sad for your divorce it was good to see how much you really cared for Donn because I hadn't seen that side of you since the first season.

Vicki,
I also thought you and Donn made a good couple. Granted I only see what is shown, but do U see you two making it work? I can still see the love.
I'm out here Vicki...it ain't easy!!!!

PS. You can have it all, but you have to put it all on the table...Whoo-Hoo!

Hi Vicky!! My heart just breaks for you! I have been going through the exact same thing the past seven months. We too, had somewhat re-committed ourselves to the relationship to no avail. We just kept getting farther apart like you and Donn. We are also in the middle of a divorce...at first it was almost unbearable; but now the days are getting better. It's true what people say....it just takes time. It's a lot af "baby steps". Luckily for you, you are a very independent woman with many friends and very strong faith. You will get through this. I wish you much love, luck and happiness!!! Godspeed! xo

I really have grown to like you alot and I am sad to hear of your divorce. You have a beautiful family I saw the sadness in your children over the divorce news.

Hang in there!

As you move forward with your life, I wish you the best. However, please take some yoga, see a therapist, something to slow down from your work. The stress will kill you. Treasure and nuture the relationships with friends and family. I've been there and now my life now is so much more fulfilling and complete. Be in the moment and enjoy!! By the way, love your daughter Brianna!! She is a hoot. She really told it like it was at the fall party!!

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