Hi everyone!!! First of all Happy Love day! I am so sorry I missed blogging last week but I have been in New York since the 5th (still here btw) running around like a crazy lady working my butt off! So this blog will be a combo blog (AKA-supersized) Let me first start off by saying I am so excited and honored to be a part of a show that has such an amazing fan base! Can you believe we are in our seventh season? I believe that is solely due to amazing fans who continue to watch and find our crazy lives entertaining! I want to sincerely thank all of you for your support and love of the original franchise through all these seasons! With that said, I think this is going to be a great season! So many changes happen this season that I don't think you guys will be expecting.
Now let's talk about last week's episode and the question everyone keeps asking me about: Tamra and my new found relationship. . .Well we certainly weren't expecting it either! However I will explain the two things that happened to me that changed my thinking towards her.
First as I watched myself last season on the show I saw a woman that wasn't me. I saw a woman that was angry, resentful, and had become negative in some ways. I have always been an upbeat positive person and I realized that I no longer wanted to allow anyone to rob me of my own joy. No matter how bad the pain, no matter how harsh the accusations, I just realized I had to let it go in order for my own spirit to repair itself.
Secondly, literally an Act of God helped change my way of thinking. Now I am far from a bible beater however I am a Christian. I believe in what the Bible promises us, and I believe in what my Pastor Rick Warren delivers to us in his messages. I was attending church after the reunion show one weekend and the sermon was about forgiveness. He said "When we do not allow ourselves to forgive we only hurt ourselves." This resonated with me deeply. I said quietly in my chair to the big guy upstairs, "But God I don't want to have to forgive and I just want to stay mad." However I was so sick of feeling the way I had been feeling for months regarding this show. So then I asked, "How could I even begin to forgive when I have so much anger, hurt, and frustration towards someone?" That's when the healing began. I started receiving my daily devotionals from SaddleBack.com talking about this exact subject. It was as if God was sending me an email everyday letting me know how to work through the pain and hurt. It was a great lesson to learn because in that process it allowed the walls to break down. It also allowed me to see what I did wrong and to ask for forgiveness as well. Now we all have our own ways of healing and I am not claiming this is the best method for everyone. I am simply sharing what transpired in my own life in order to come to a place of peace with Tamra. I have received many tweets and messages (as I am sure Tamra has received as well) from people who are concerned, confused, and almost angry at me for being friends with her. Although this makes me appreciate you all even more knowing how much you truly do care about me, please rest assured that at this point it was a great decision and I am so grateful that Tamra and I could forgive one another and get to know one another all over again without any outside influences affecting us. Thus the reason you see me tell Slade that I am doing this for me and not to hurt him in any way. That doesn't mean Tamra and I don't hit some bumps along the road or question if we can really learn to trust one another again. However I value the new friendship we have found. Seriously it does sound like we are dating. . .doesn't it? LOL
Nice blog. Agree with V guests should be more adventurous. Agree also V is judgmental and hypocritical at times. It will be nice if she learns from it. Not a crazy Tamra fan but not against her either. Thinks she is fun and occasionally oversteps. I do think that you were just as responsible for what happened between you guys and that you tend to put most of blame on her. Also, it wasn't fun to be dragged into this mess by JP. I don't think you've always been the beacon of honesty, so... to put this all on Tamra is a little disingenuous. Reminds me of tequila party where you blamed your flirtatiousness on everyone but yourself.
Gretchen - I think you're fantastic. I also think you and Slade have a genuine, honest and loving relationship.
One thing I want you to be aware of regarding Tamra - who personally, I would trust about as far as I could throw her.
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. But after the third time, you are no longer a victim - you are a volunteer. Just be sure you don't volunteer for anymore of her backstabbing.
The way she called you out about your lips at Vicki's dinner party??? WTF was that??? She's one of those stupid people who says and does stupid sh!t when they get nervous or excited....or breathe.
Proceed with caution!
I swear that I have gained so much respect for you in these first few episodes. I used to love you and then last season I felt like you weren't being yourself anymore and had decided to be mean, but I'm really glad to see the fun, sweet Gretchen back!!
I wish you luck with your business but do you have to jump on the breast cancer awareness band wagon to do so. My sister suffers from breast cancer and nothing infuriates her more than people promoting themselves or their products disguised as real concern for people with breast cancer. To think that you stand to make a profit on your handbags by using this horrible disease disgusts me too!
Two points-1. You do not like pretentious people, then WHY do you hang with Alexis, probably one of the most pretentious people on your show. 2. Give the newcomer a chance before you look for insult in everything she says. When the viewer watches that what we glean from it is that you are very young and not very tolerant. Give Heather a chance before you start with the negativity. I am sure Pastor Warren would have a thing or two to say about that, right?
Oh Gretchen, you're so COM PLICATED, lol.
But as a fellow Scorpio (who's incidentally also Christian), meh- to heck with it, I gotta give ya a pass, lol.
So happy that sweet, fun-loving Gretchen is back - - I just adore you!!! Good for your for standing by Slade when everyone else was so nasty about him - - shows great character!!
U r right G, we don't understand why u would ever on earth give T, the time of day, now that she has deceided she want's 2 make up, and the only reason she want's 2 do that is because she cameoff looking like sh.., over the way she has treated u and Slade, I realy like u love watching your new line of handbag's and other thing's, but u say how much u love Slade, and then u turn right around and side with the enemy, shame on u, if I was Slade, I would walk off or did u not c or watch the reun, the way she stuck her noisenin his affair's and had no right. u should watch it, and u will c 4 yourself, how and why we all feel that way.
Gretchen, it seems as though everything is going on the right track for you. It is nice to see your eyes smiling, they didn't much last season. I truly admire the statements you made about the deadbeat dad stuff relating to Brooks. That's integrity. I can totally get Slade's anger and impatience with the whole thing. Honestly, he doesn't have to say a thing. A nice smug smile says it all.
Gretchen - Glad you are finding happiness after your sadness with Jeff's passing. Your photo shoot was beautiful! A great way to bring attention to breast cancer awareness. Any negative comments (VICKI???) are from pure jealousy that they don't have your terrific body and looks --- we should all be so lucky! I enjoy watching you...and you took the high road in making up with Tamra, even if it might not last. At least you are on a civil footing, even if you aren't meant to be best buddies. Curious, isn't it - that Tamra should be so worried about Vicki's reaction -- aren't you all grown women? Shows how controlling Vicki is. Also, I agree with you that having a party at the house she was still currently sharing with Donn was disrespectful. I have always thought Donn deserved so much more than he was getting from his marriage. I hope he finds a terrific woman out there who appreciates him for who he really is ---- and lets him wear the pants in the family!!
I think it's awesome you forgave Tamra. I can already see the positive affect it had on you. I look forward to watching you this season.
You are just too cool!!! I totally get you...Scorp as well. As for Slade, didn't like him in the beginning and thought you were too good for him but now I see the chemistry and the love. You two are really good together. Both intelligent and both can be goofballs. Looking forward to the rest of the season.
I think you're great, and I think you & Slade are great together!
Tamra?....I'd trust her about as far as I could throw her.
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me 3+ times...then you are no longer a victim, but a volunteer.
Proceed with caution with that girl...she likes to stir alot of crap.
I am glad to see your forgiving Tamara. Nothing can hurt you spirit more than bitterness towards someone. I have found that nothing is as great a feeling as forgiveness! Continued Prayer for direction in life is always a good thing, too. Glad to see you and your smiling face this year. You really have a position to be a good role model for other young women being on this Show..
Wow, you are so lively and refreshing!! I love you and Slade together and am so impressed with your desire to let the anger go and be friends with Tamra. Vicki could have definitely served something better than crawfish in a plastic bag, Seriously! I am a southern cajun and have never seen such a thing. Crawfish are served on a large platter with potatoes and corn. Or how about crawfish enchiladas or crawfish fettuccine?? I won't even peel my own sitting in my own home with jeans on!!
Gretchen, I like you and Slade, this season. It appears as though you are both really in love. I appreciate your contributions to the show.
First let me start out by saying "Gretchen I love you girlfriend!! I think you are a touch of "Great Class" to this group of women. I have been watching you since the beginning of OC Housewives and you are truly amazing. I am so happy to watch you grow and become a successful women. I think its also amazing how you love Slade with passion and caring that most women take for granted in their relationships. You did good girlfriend and Im a HUGE fan of yours...stay true to yourself always & god bless you. You make me proud to be a women. Gracey-Warwick,RI
I am happy you and Tamra are friends again. I have liked both of you guys all these past seasons. I actually watch the show not for the drama, but for the fun times and experiences you gals have. You and Tamra seem like a good time! I hope it lasts.
I love you on this show, your sense of humor is refreshing to the show... please stay the way your are!
Gretchen- You are and have been my favorite person to watch on this show because of your positive outlook on life. Even last season, while you may have seen a negative side of yourself coming out (which is good to try to rid yourself of), you were always the positive bubbly one! I loved it when your part would come on! Because with everyone else it was always drama drama drama. Then, it would be time for the Gretchen scene and you'd just be happily going along with a smile on your face! LOVE that! I am glad you are working toward self-improvement and I still love the Gretchen I see on this show. As for Heather- Your friend totally deflated when she made the comment about the ring. I think it was just unnecessary. She had been so happy and excited to talk about the engagement only to have somebody just squash it over a ring. I felt SO bad for her. I think Heather may have realized that and tried to save herself by sharing her non-romantic story of engagement, but it didn't help her at all. I look forward to see how things unfold this season but for some reason it already seems like there is less tension this season than there was last time.
Gretchen, You have held your own throughout each season. You work hard and so does Slade. i never thought much of him b4 last season, but he really encourages and supports your dreams. Im glad he is working again, times are tough now, so good for him for finding something. You will prob catch hell for the Breast Cancer pics, but jeez, you are a young beautiful woman, be proud. Im going to check out your website, the bags are gorgeous! I wish you all the luck w your endeavors. Your parents should be proud of you, You are a strong, successful woman. You have brought out the best in Slade w your unwavering support. You are the whole package! Yes, I DO get your humor, i think you are hilarious!
Good for you! You know you cannot change her. You cannot control her. You can only change yourself. Good luck this year.
I like you a bunch so far this season. I am so pleased that you shared what led you to take the steps toward forgiveness. It is very uplifting. I find myself struggling with it quite often. I am a very strong Christian, but it is hard to take the high road sometimes. I admire you. I am not sure if you have had any kind of "work" done, but you look prettier and prettier each season. You are beautiful and have an amazing figure. You are tiny, but you don't look anorexic or unhealthy. You look perfect!
Loved your blog Gretchen. I am so proud of you taking the time to meet with Tamra and forgiving her. It is so difficult when someone has wronged you so badly and hard to get passed that. I have learned in life that usually people who are deeply wounded tend to wound others so that they look good. Pray for Tamra that she gets healed where it is needed. You can now have more peace with yourself. So happy to hear that you are attending church and pray that the Lord minister to you. Check out Jentzen Franklin's church there. He's a great man of God. I think Alexis goes there. Just wanted to say I enjoyed your blog and pray that you have continual peace in your life.
You are cute Gretchen and not only men are allowed to call another woman cute...get over yourself. Also Slade owes all women in their 40's an apology. I'm in my 40's and a military wife and I have done more with my life then he ever will and I am a much stronger person then he will ever be. You need to stop making excuses for him by saying he's protecting you, he's not, he's just being a butt!! And you could do a lot better...
Gretchen! I absolutely love you! I'm so happy you were able to forgive Tamara :) I've always enjoyed you but when you became resentful & angry towards Tamara, it wasn't you. I totally agree with you, Rick Warren's devotionals have helped me. I'm happy for you! xoxoxo
well i guess it sounds like alot of other people have told you to watch your back.just remember if we are christians.we do not drop one friend to have another.alexis tryed to get you and tamra together so many times.she should get some credit.always stan for what is right.god bless you alexis vicki sarah and i think heather seems like a class act like alexis.more reserved with there language i should say.next week.
Vicki wasn't having a celebration of her new love party she specifically says its an end of the summer/moving out of her house soon party. The guy shes been dating is from the south and thats the kind of food shes been eating and tries to share it with the housewives. She clearly states all these things but maybe Gretchen was too busy making snide comments about the food to take notice. Granted the plastic bag full of food wasn't the most appetizing approach to exposing the ladies to new cuisine, I feel her heart was in the right place and that the women were still RUDE by how closed minded they were being.
Gretchen, you have grown so much over these past few years. I am in agreement with your thoughts on forgiveness and I have also been taught by my Christian parents that "how can you be forgiven if you are unwilling to forgive yourself"...and I was told that when I finally stand before Jesus and have come to Him with unforgiveness and asking for Him to forgive me for my countless mistakes, I will be judged in the same manner. It's great that you have a BIG heart. You are truly refreshing and we love you. Slade made a great comment as well (we too want to like him, but haven't been able to yet) Slade commented that Vicci is always FIRST to judge and make ridiculous accusations and apparently her new boyfriend has greater issues and that's horrible...but her judgment is not something she does well as you stated. When she entertains; sleeps in the same bed as her beau and continuous to brag about how he meets all HER needs (gross) and Don is there watching this, I find her to be the lowest form of scum regardless....And I pray to God she will stop with the signing of the cross continuously. That is a Catholic form of respect and she is null and void of those as far as our home is concerned. Checking on your new goodies, sure I will buy, thanks for entertaining us and not doing it at the sake of someone else. I hope your parents are proud, they should be. God Bless
Love Love Love you Gretchen! Great job for making amends with Tamra. Forgive but never forget. Life is too short to live your life always wanting to be right. We are all human and make mistakes (ie.. Whitney Houston)....looking forward to seeing your smiling face! :-)
Girl, I LOVE YOU! No, seriously, I am not a crazy person! But I watch the show religiously, and you are my favorite. You are so real, so down to earth, and honest. I love your statement, "Happiness is never apologizing for being me." That has been applied to my own life, as a strong willed, stand up, no nonsense girl. I think what you do and how you do it is done with grace and class, and a whole lot of humor. Keep being you. You are the truest bluest girl on the cast. And I love how you admit looking back that last season you were not yourself. That is all we as humans and woman can do. Instead of passing the buck and placing the blame, hold your self accountable and trust and believe that our own lives are what WE make it. You truly are rockin this life girl! Your by far my favorite and have been from day one. I love your spunk! Keep it up!
I think it was wonderful for you and Tamra to bury the hatchet. You are both fun woman and are fun to watch. BTW, you look so remarkable. Is your makeup line available for the public? I love your pastor. He came and filled in for my pastor before. ;) God bless.
Emai me back, I have much experieince and would be thrilled to help see you see your hard work be a success!! You are a dynamo and together we could get to the right people and use both of our talents and you can concentrate on your vision and branding.
To Gretchen...I think you are being the bigger person by accepting her in your life. I don't watch the show faithfully, but enough to see the jealousy in Tamra's eyes when she looks at you and talks to you. You have it all. A good personality, beauty, and a smart working woman. THat saying that goes" you can see a person's soul through their eyes"... is an execellent example of Tamra.. .When she has an upclose shot, of her face, and look at her eyes, I see no soul.... I see envy , spite, and manipulation. But towards you the most. She is so jealous of you and she has no clue, how transparent it is to everyone. If you feel , for the sake of the show, you had to reach down deep into your faith to make some sort of friendship with her , I understand that. For me, I stay away from people like that. And if it is a situation that can't be helped and that person IS in your life, remember boundaries. You can have boundaries and I am sure you know, that even after talking with her, you still wont be able to trust her. I hope that the entire show is not just an act , I would be extremely embarressed by writing this email.
I am so happy to read about how you came to forgive. I love that you are true to yourself! You are my fav and I see the love you and Slade have for each other! You rock!!! Stay real girlfriend:)
Gretchen! I love you! You're my favorite! My girlfriends and I love you so much, and enjoy watching you! I hope I can meet you one day, you're a role model! :) Keep being your fun, positive, beautiful self. XOXO
Glad that you also excepted responsibity for some of the rift between you and Tamara, you and your passive aggressive way of laughing while taking side jabs at people shows that you are just as mean spirited as Tamara, Vickie and even that dumb girl Alexis are. Be more authentic and not so phony and Shallow. You are not my fav housegirl because you appear very insecure and not know who you are yet, spend more time praying and maybe you will figure this out. Good luck with finding "You". BTW, stop calling slade "your Bitch" because you can't pull the humor off like Tamara is able to, just because YOU laugh does not mean its funny.
Good for you. I am glad to see you in a carefree place. Last season you were a badgirl and that just didn't seem to be natural for you. I became one of your fans on your first season because you were down to earth and natural. Now, hopefully you will get back to looking like a natural beauty instead of looking injected like the other woman. I don't know who is injecting these ladies but there is nothing wrong with aging, especially when it looks better than a stiff face. Get back to your natural self...that is the girl we all fell in love with!
Gretchen i think that it is awesome that you have forgiven and you and Tamara are better friends everything you said was true. Loved your shoot for the cause of Breast Cancer and the pic just fabulous!! Loved your pink track suit, is that from your collection? If so where can i get one ?
Hi Gretchen. Good to see you're back and doing well. Let me tell you something honey, before the dinner party on the very first episode of season 7. Instantly and I mean instantly I could tell Tamera has had a face-lift.Vicky has had one to. Absolutely it's obvious. Tamera had some nerve commenting OUT LOUD that you had your lips done.You don't need any tweaking done to your face.Leave your face and your hair alone. You don't need extensions either.You have beautiful hair.You're perfect from head to toe.
Ouch Gretchen!! I really hope that you are not going to be fooled by Tamra! She is obviously up to something with her "friendship bracelet" throw away the past act. You and Alexis are my favorites of the new group but if youa re going to let Tamara fool you into buying this sweet act you are not the strong independant intellegent woman that we all have come to love! She is a bleached viper in short skirts! Don't let her fool you!!!!
Whew!! So glad the RHOC ALL blogged, unlike the RHOA...ahem!! Gretchen, love your blog! I don't know, I totally get your sense of humor and well...I guess you have finally proven (not that you needed to) that your heart is in the right place with Slade! You're not perfect, unlike myself - ba! ha! ha! ha! - (KIDDING!). All I'm going to say is keep doing what you're doing! I really hope that you and Tamra are in a good place because the two of you are hysterical together! Alexis...well....I don't know. Looking forward to see how the season plays out! Take care!
Hi Gretchen... you are just being a bigger person (besides being sincere and honest), and i respect that about you. You have a great success ahead of you!!! Ps. Say hi to Carina ;)