Cast Blog: #RHOC

Some Serious Jerry Springer S--t

Tamra: Lizzie's Obsessed With Me

Shannon Settles the Score

Lizzie: Tamra Doesn't Fight Fair

Heather: Why Hate?

RHOC Reunion GIFs: The Gloves Come Off

Lizzie on That Kentucky Fried Nickname

Shannon on Heather's Double Standard

RHOC Reunion GIFs: Psychics, Opinions, and Shade

Heather Weighs in on the Dinner Party

The Difference Between Shannon and Heather

Lizzie Forgives Tamra

Vicki Wants the Best for Tamra

GIF Recap: RHOC Season 9 Finale

Vicki: I'm Tired of Tamra Causing Problems

Recap: 13 GIF-able Life Lessons from Bali

Tamra: Lizzie Is the Worst Kind of Person

Lizzie: Tamra Has it Out for Me

Shannon: There's No Hope Tamra and I

Tamra: Lizzie's Out for Blood

Heather: Can't Friends Disagree

Lizzie: What Tamra's Doing Isn't Right

GIF Recap: Kayaks, Crowns, and Elephants

Shannon Was Shocked Tamra Would Betray Her

Tamra: I Was a Fool to Defend Vicki

Heather: Newsflash It's Not All My Fault

Vicki's Warning to Lizzie

Shannon Isn't Putting Emotions onto Tamra

Lizzie: I Thought Tamra Was My Friend

GIF Recap: Lizzie's Lonely Birthday Dance

Tamra: I'm Going to Be a Tam-ma!

Vicki: This Episode Was Hard to Watch

Heather: I Did Owe Shannon an Apology

Shannon: Tamra Is Stirring the Pot

Lizzie: Tamra Is Stirring Up Sh--

GIF Recap: What Does Tamra Remember?

Vicki Is Trying to Stay Neutral

Shannon: Tamra's Lies Are Mind Boggling

GIF Recap: Lizzie's Dinner Party Disaster

Vicki Advises Shannon to Keep Communication Lines Open

Lizzie: "I Take Sun Kitten Swimwear Very Seriously"

Some Serious Jerry Springer S--t

Episode 1: Bravotv.com's Associate Editor ponders bottoms shaped like fruit, friendships, and crawfish.

Well welcome back Orange County fans! As we enter in our magical seventh season everything is different! Gretchen and Tamra are having lunch! Vicki is dating a Southerner. We have a brunette! Let's make sense of all these changes, shall we?

BFFS 4 EVA
After the bananas-town reunion last season, I was a little dubious to see how this would turn out. Hopefully, Gretchen chose a restaurant with tables bolted down, thin paper menus, and drinks with tops. Slade is also dubious, but he recommends a nice restaurant with furniture too heavy for Tamra to lift and she's on her way.

Once they arrive, the "dogs start sniffing each other's butts" (as Tamra so eloquently analogized), mojitos are served, and gals got to talking. Honestly, I'm overjoyed with how breezily this went. Both these ladies are a barrel of fun times, so it makes more sense that they are friends. They're putting that water under the bridge (even if its an ocean's worth). Then Tamra makes Gretchen a friendship bracelet that is either the key to the future or the lock to the security deposit of their past, tough to say. That's the thing about friendship bracelets based on metaphors, they are open to interpretation.

Big Fun
Well she's finally here. The latest lady to join our California dreamers -- Heather Dubrow. She seems like she has it all (at least according to Tamra) "She’s very tall, she’s very thin, she's very pretty and she's probably a b---h." She's ready to drop $4.9 million on a lot. She loves to text. And she's not afraid of the getting a little wine on her. We'll see how this goes, but if I had to make a Magic 8 Ball assessment of this I'd say "Outlook Good."

I personally loved Tamra explaining the intricacies of the other ladies to Heather. There was something so foreboding about her mentioning to steer clear of parities with red wine. 

 

The Banana Boat
It's nearly impossible for me to pick my favorite moments from Alexis' foray into live television. First, I adore that Alexis thought she could will a sleeping Jim into answering the phone by air kissing it. It's delightful that Alexis' alarm clock indiscretion resulted in a hooky day for the kids, so good for them. No school lunches or whisper games! Just a day of fun!

But then we get to the real fun -- Dr. Booty. Is he officially a doctor? Who knows, but he is at least qualified to teach you how to qualify your badonk as a fruit. Are you a cherry bottom, pear, banana, apple, lemon? My first question was does a banana bottom peel? My second question was is it possible that my butt is a star fruit? 

As Alexis "fired" during her banana exercise and discussed her career as budding "Katie Keurig," I smiled knowing that we'll have a season's worth of these exploits. Here's to hoping National Booty Awareness Month comes 12 times a year. 

The Ragin' Cajun
Meanwhile, in Vicki-land, after teaching Michael that an unmade duvet is one of the main reason people don't buy houses (true) and explaining that Donn is still living in the house but they haven't seen each other in two months (WHAT?!?). I guess she's been busy with her new Mississippi man, Brooks. Vicki seems very zen (perhaps it's the marathon sex sessions Tamra couldn't get her to confirm). 

So what better way to celebrate her new Southern beau than with a party. Just a simple affair with oysters, crawfish, and tension over the affections of Jim Bellino. . .

And when the ladies (all of them, including Gretchen's brunette bestie Sarah Winchester) arrive, things aren't exactly as jubilant as a good old fashioned crawfish boil (trust me, I know) particularly with Alexis and Peggy. 

Next week, the tensions at the shindig come to a head -- a crawfish head. Hopefully Vicki speaks in a Cajun accent and smooths things over. Then things even more dramatic when Vicki and Tamra head on vacation with their gents. What was your favorite part of the premiere? Leave your

Heather: Why Hate?

Heather wonders why you'd live in a place of resentment and tries to move on with the ladies.

We have put ourselves on a show where our every move is scrutinized. We are not perfect people. No one is perfect. We all do and say things we regret. Most of us do not do it in front of an international audience. You are all entitled to your opinions. It's what makes the show interesting, fun, and a "watercooler" conversation piece.

Regardless what you think about us, the show and/or what you believe truly happened this season -- I feel blessed and grateful.

My "reality" is an incredible husband who loves me and respects me, four healthy, amazing kids, a career that's been revived largely in part to the exposure of being on RHOC, and a group of friends that accepts my weaknesses and celebrates my strengths.

Truly, there is nothing more I could ever ask for. It's very easy to judge and hate -- but why? Does it make you feel better about your own life? Have you never done or said anything you regret? Can you imagine if it were captured for the world to see? I hope to keep growing and learning from my mistakes and my experiences. I hope you all do too. I hope you are all not judged too harshly and are forgiven when you are ready to make amends. Living in a space of hate and resentment is a bad place to exist. It's much better to love, forgive, and move on. I feel that's where I've come with all of the ladies at this point. Now we will see what the future holds. Thank you again for your support of our family and the show. . .

Until we meet again. . .

XX,
Heather

Remember to follow me on Instagram and Twitter (@heatherdubrow) for all of the latest on the Dubrow family!

The first six episodes of #SEQUESTERED are available for download at Crackle.com and the next six will be out in October! Thanks again for your continuing support!

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