Dinner at Vintage Steakhouse was hard for me to watch. I was in such a different place then, and all I can say is, "Boy does time heal all wounds."
It was a year and half into our relationship and I was still afraid to bring Eddie around the kids. I share custody with Simon. When Simon had the kids, I would see Eddie, and when I had the kids I didn't want to share my time with them. Sure he had met them before and he would come by for dinner once in a while, but that was about it. I was so afraid that my children would be uncomfortable and that Eddie would get annoyed and leave me.
I also had a hard time with fact that Simon had moved in with his girlfriend (who the kids love) and when he had the kids she would pick them up from school. Sharing custody is one of the many struggles of divorce. I want to be the one picking up my kids every single day from school. I want to tuck them in to bed every night. I just don't have that option anymore, and it took me a long time to get over the pain. . . I'm still struggling with it. I wasn't lashing out at Simon for being happy and moving on, and NO his girlfriend is not half his age -- just much younger. I just couldn't understand how it was so easy for him to move on and so hard for me. After all, I wanted this divorce. I often wonder, do the strong people stay in an unhappy marriages or is it the strong ones that leave?
Eddie is an amazing man and has helped me with my divorce every step of the way. He is so kind, considerate, and thoughtful. He makes an effort to make my children feel like they are loved by him every day. Eddie grew up without his father, and his mother bounced in and out of his life. He understands more than anyone what its like to come from a broken home. He told me today "Babe stop worrying, all these kids need is love and support. They will adapt to all the change." I just don't understand how I got so lucky.