The First 'Wives Club

Episode 1:'s Associate Editor ponders bottoms shaped like fruit, friendships, and crawfish.

Feb 7, 2012

The Banana Boat
It's nearly impossible for me to pick my favorite moments from Alexis' foray into live television. First, I adore that Alexis thought she could will a sleeping Jim into answering the phone by air kissing it. It's delightful that Alexis' alarm clock indiscretion resulted in a hooky day for the kids, so good for them. No school lunches or whisper games! Just a day of fun!

But then we get to the real fun -- Dr. Booty. Is he officially a doctor? Who knows, but he is at least qualified to teach you how to qualify your badonk as a fruit. Are you a cherry bottom, pear, banana, apple, lemon? My first question was does a banana bottom peel? My second question was is it possible that my butt is a star fruit? 

As Alexis "fired" during her banana exercise and discussed her career as budding "Katie Keurig," I smiled knowing that we'll have a season's worth of these exploits. Here's to hoping National Booty Awareness Month comes 12 times a year.