Troy has opened my eyes to a whole new kind of love that I couldn't have imagined. I want to be the best mom that I can be for him, and with every decision I make, I have him in mind. I want him to be proud of me and know how much I love him.
I want to have a strong marriage with Ryan and continue to build on our relationship to give Troy a good, stable household filled with love. Having Troy has allowed me to feel more empathetic for my mom and how amazing she is as a mother. Throughout my life she has always put my brother and myself first and was always focused on our happiness. If I'm half as good of a mom as she is, then I'll have done something right.
The decision to move into my mom's house was not an easy one to make. While I was pregnant, Ryan and I were house hunting and put a few offers on homes nearby and came very close to purchasing a home for our family. Ryan got orders to move to another base almost three hours away, so we cancelled our house hunt and started brainstorming on our options. At that time, Donn was still living with my mom and getting ready to move out, which was going to leave my mom physically, emotionally, and financially alone in the large house.
Rumors began to fly at Ryan's work of an upcoming deployment and he received unofficial word that he would be deployed October 14, and my due date for the baby to arrive was October 10! Ryan and I sat down with my mom and the three of us came to an agreement that seemed to solve all problems, we would move into my mom's house so we could help my mom financially and I would have support from my mom while Ryan was in Afghanistan. My only concern with moving back home with my mom was that I didn't want whomever my mom was dating to be coming in and out of the house with the baby and I living there because I want a stable, positive environment for Troy.
You should look back at your behavior at the reunion show. It's disgusting. I think your behavior and anger also stems from the fact that your first longtime boyfriend who was also on this show left you cold when he went to college, your mom's divorces and I don't know what else. This is why you can't see the true ryan and afraid he's gonna leave you too. That is prob why you had to rush and get married and have 'his' child. You have issues with guys leaving and has made you insecure. Open your eyes. It's ok to say your husband is wrong sometimes. It doesn't mean you love him any less. Just don't be so blind and stupid. Did you look at how ugly you came off on the reunion?! So angry. Now that's not healthy for your baby and I thought you wanted to provide a good environment for baby troy. And while you're staying home, why don't you lose some weight? Look at yourself at the reunion. Esp when you were so angry and all that fat on your neck was all bulging out. Put energy into looking good for your angry hubby and baby troy.
These reality shows are so comical most of the time... but the situation you're in is NOT funny. Ryan's behavior is serious, and NOT to be ignored. It appears to be more than just an anger problem: he seems to need power, likes to be in control, and appears very aggressive (blurting out he's the owner of the house, then catching himself and saying he lives there). When confronted about what happened, he lies. Just flat out lies, blaming others for the onset of the problem. It's always someone else. This is a personality trait... people like Ryan are drawn to powerful events and serving in the Military.
Brianna, I completely agree with your opinion on Brooks and understand why you are protecting your mother. However, I cannot seem to understand how you can tell your mother "to stop making excuses for" Brooks when you continue to make excuses for Ryan. Do you not see the similarities between the situations? I know that we have not gotten the whole story on Brooks but comparing the 2 isolates situations both drunk men made threats to women. Ryan threatened to throw an elderly woman (who hardly knew)'s ass out and Brooks threatened to beat up Vicki! We did not see the video of Brooks, but the viewers did see the rage in Ryan's eyes. You also do not need to make excuses for Ryan. If you expect Vicki and Brooks to acknowledge his poor behavior then also acknowlegde your husband's. Otherwise, you're sticking your head in the sand just like your mother!
As a military wife of 21 yrs, the excuse for Briana keeps using for Ryan's behavior is BS! Being deployed and the military ARE NOT the reason he acted that way. Acting that way is a personality trait NOT a Military trait!!! The Military community that I live around is appalled by his actions. Completely APPALLED!!! Everyone I know in the military has said if they were there that night they would have come to Lydia's mother's defense. Shame on them for blaming the military. If the military is making him this way then he needs to get out and stop making our Honorable men and women look bad.
I can't believe that after you saw the show of your mom's winter wonderland party that you still make excuses for Ryan. Give me a break. You were full of excuses and very rude to Lydia! I loved the excuse of how Ryan had been around your mom for a month or so and just took on her personality when it came to feet on the furniture. There was no excuse for his behavior, he could of asked Lydia's mom to take off her shoes or even got a towel to put under her shoes. There was no excuse for his behavior and your behavior on the Reunion part 3 with Lydia. You can clearly hear Ryan cursing at her for no reason.
Briana - I've actually never posted on any Housewife (or any Bravo, for that matter) Blog before. No offense...not really my thing.
That said - I have a husband who is a veteran. I watched/heard the scene at the Winter Wonderland Party, and recognized so much of what my family has been through.
First of all (as I know you know), your husband's reaction was, by all accounts and purposes, totally inappropriate. But it hit close to home. Anger, quick temper and anxiety - all common among our Nation's veterans and current military.
I was fortunate that when my husband was deployed, I lived on a military base surrounded by those who understood. I feel awful that you are in the OC - I'm guessing not too many "get it".
Please read up on PTSD. Please get yourself the knowledge necessary to deal with what may be coming home to you.
And please know you aren't alone.
Amen and amen. He has anger issues and you will soon be the recipient of his outbursts if you haven't been already.
Briana; you are a bully. I've never posted before but watching you today made me sick and compelled to post. You are no better than your insecure husband and a disrespectful ......... I would be embarrassed to be you. And quit using Afghanistan as a reason that no one can talk about you but you can sure dish it. Bully!
I think you are amazing, beautiful, strong and intelligent. You have always been a class act on the show as well as very honest and REAL. I wish you love and a beautiful life. You deserve only the best. I bless you that your husband comes home alive and well. Stay true to who you are. You are one in a million and don't forget that.
You don't want men in out and out the house.. what about a film crew? Oh, you make money on that.
You say you are protective and "picky" about who your mom dates; what if she did the same thing to you at this point in your life? Doubt if Ryan would make the cut....
i understand taking up for your Husband, however, after seeing the tape, how could you? he was blatantly Wrong and verbally abusive. i hope that you can see that, and see the signs of his behavior. the bottom line is, its not your home. no matter how much you pay, he is not the "man" of the house. It seems Ryan has some archaic and obviously strange views on life and living with someone. not very modern or professional as a service member either. I hope you can enlighten Ryan to his actions instead of just making excuses. Guests in ANY home should be treated with respect, not threatened and verbally abused. shame on you Ryan. i hope you're a better father and husband than you are a son in law because that was a Mess!!
Your mom will figure it out, no need to be a major intrusion between her and Brooks. I think Ryan is a ticking time bomb and your clouded by all your fists, first marriage, first baby, etc
It must have been so hard to keep all this bottled up. I am glad the recording got leaked and it forced that guy to own up to it and your mother too. It is never easy when our closest loved ones just don't want to see the truth.
God bless your husband, your son, and your family. I hope your Mom breaks the pattern and knows you love her and are fighting for her to have better than what she thinks she deserves.
Dear Briana, your mother is so lucky she has you.
I was very young when in my house appeared a "sleazy fish" like Brooks . Nothing I can do, nobody listen to what I have to say. At the and my mother sold our apartment and give all the money to this man. We're an up homeless. If I could find this man now, I would gladly brake some parts of his body. You have all rights to keep a distance and voice your concerns. Please do not take to heart the negative comments. - I suspect that majority it is Brooks under false pretense. The rest probably never had a similar experience, when you see that your dear mother being cheated. Out of her time, money atc.
Briana, I have 4 sons and one of them has irked his life for our country just like Ryan has or will. These guys are our unsigned heros and the stress they are under is often not appreciated or acknowledged. Knowing Ryan's coming deployment is imminent would cause anyone stress. I'm sure he's not proud of his outburst, but people should give him some slack. His heart was in the right place I'm sure. He wants to protect you, his son and Vicky. The 64yr-old woman should have just apologized and taken her stupid feet off the couch. I'm sure with his stress level at the time, the self-indulged, rich, spoiled and self proclaimed Fairy Dust Lady who just ignored his efforts to keep his mother-in-law's furniture nice pulled at his last nerve. Give the guy a break.
Briana, you need to open your eyes. I understand that as a wife you need to defend your spouse. However when your spouse is acting out like a lunatic you also have the right to put him in his place. Your husband thinks as the man of the house he has the right to boss your mom around, and kick old women out of the house. I am 32 years old and I was always taught to respect my Elders and that men should respect women. There is so much violence around the world toward women. Your husband doesn't need to contribute to that with his abusive and threatening behavior! Your mother has been through more things in her life than you will every know. You need to respect that! If I were you, I would worry more about how your own husband behaves rather than Brooks seeing your mother. I had to learn this same thing when my mom was dating. There were plenty of men that I did not approve of, and a lot were jerks. No matter what I said she still had to learn it for herself, and I was always there for her no matter what decision she made. Your mother is an intelligent, strong, and independent woman who deserves to be happy in her life. She has worked hard to get there. I am married and have been married for 11 years this December. I love my husband and he his perfect for me, but one thing I have learned is that as a spouse my voice deserves to be heard and given validation. Don't always go a long with your husband because he is so overpowering that you cannot get a word in edgewise. Just because he is so adamant that he may be right in ALL decisions made doesn't mean he is and it doesn't mean that you have to agree. You need to watch the episode where Ryan blew up, you need to see the situation for how it really is no matter how much it may be embarrassing or hurtful. You need to put your foot down, unless it is that you support abusive behavior toward women. If more than one person is telling you that your husband has issues that he needs to address, then maybe, just maybe you aren't seeing what is really going on because you are too close to the situation. Take a step back, watch this episode, think back to other situations that were similar to this one and even speak to your mom. She has the best advice because believe it or not, she has probably been in the same situation sometime before as well. You don't know everything, you don't need to parent your mother, you need to love her, accept her, and support her and listen to the advice she has for you. She loves you so much, she loves your son more than the entire world, she would give anything to you and do anything for you. But, she hasn't asked you to be her parent, nor has she asked your husband to be the ruler or leader of the house. She has looked over your husbands behavior and demands before, because she didn't want to hurt you or lose your love. But you both have made demands over demands to your mother, it seems you don't appreciate any of the things she has done for you. I hope she kicks you both out of the house. I only hope that you both do not punish her by denying her to see her grandbaby.
Ryan's behavior was flat out verbally abusive on this last episode. Up until now you had support on the whole Brooks situation, but after watching your husband disrespect your mother, her house and her guests, you don't anymore! You need to move on and grow up. You've got a family - you've made your bed- go lie in it. But watch that husband of yours....Brooks is nothing compared to what is raging in Ryan. I think that's we he's made such a deal out of Brooks - to deflect attention from him and onto someone else, so the true Ryan isn't seen on tv.
Seriously? You feel that your mom having someone visit her in her home could possibly be any more unstable than Ryan's behavior? The fact that he has cameras monitoring ya'll while he's overseas doesn't offer you any additional protection. It's his only means to control you from there. I'm left to wonder what goes on that we don't see on camera. I couldn't help but notice that when your husband shouted at your mother "NOT TO PUT HER ARM AROUND JUDY" that she jerked it away immediately as if she was frightened. Wonder what his reaction will be when the baby spills a drink on the furniture (and he will) in the future?
I know as a nurse you have been thought about abusive and controlling people. I am sure you also learned about battered women and how women stay in abusive relationships because they feel they can't find anyone better or what happens to their kids if they didn't. You also have learned that they don't act like this all the time and especially not at the beginning and that most of the times you start to notice this behavior of theirs with others around and then you. I hope that this opened your eyes to stop making excuses for his sorry behavior and see him for who he really is. I hate to hear excuses such as he is fighting for our country. A man who treats women the way he did has no honor. The bottom line is that he is a jerk and a loser. He probably started dating you because of your mother's fame and money. As you heard him clearly, he thinks he owns your mother's house. It is funny how he has been projecting his own thoughts on to brooks and has been saying that he has been with your mom to take advantage while all along he has been the same. Shame on him for treating a sweet woman and a guest of your mother the way he did and shame on him for lying about how it happened to try to cover his track, and shame on you if you excuse his behavior and supporting him! And especially shame on you to talk so judgmentally about your mother and her choices in man while obviously even when you know so much better you end up with worse choices anyways!
Never really cared for your and Ryan's approach to the Brooks situation, though he does make me want to throw up, but your husband's behavior was truly shocking. There is quite simply no excuse. He was controlling, aggressive and threatening, and you had that sheepish look on your face and in your voice that says you've seen it all before. YOU need to get some help, and get some help for him. Of all the "drama" on the Housewives shows, this was really and truly shocking and scary.
Compared to Ryan, Brooks is a SAINT. Neither you nor your pathetic husband have room to say a bad word about him ever again!!! And it doesn't matter that Ryan is saying it was edited to make him look bad----the parts we did see of him speaks volumes. Plus, he's already proven he's a liar on national tv, so he's lying about this too. And he didn't look drunk to me. He's just a disgusting sorry excuse of a man.
Brianna, you ought to be ashamed of yourself. How dare you opine on your mother's choice of a man, when yours is a complete lunatic? You played your mom like a fiddle. You said you were afraid that Brooks was using her, but look at Ryan!! He even slipped and said he owned the house. This is NOT your house, and it CERTAINLY isn't his. You two are holding this "threat" of moving out of your mother's house if she sees Brooks. Why don't you two live like NORMAL human beings, ON YOUR OWN!!!
I hope your eyes are opened now!!! That was so scary! I hope you apologize to Lydia after seeing what truly happened and how out of control your husband was! Seriously, you may want to get your husband some help. I fear for you and your baby if you ever make him mad. He was so out of control, I know you must be embarrassed by his behavior. I doubt he is embarrassed he is spinning it as if it was just bad editing. He must know viewers aren't that stupid to believe it. Get him some help or get yourself a good divorce lawyer.
Wow! Your husband is a nut case!. What a ugly face he has put on our military. He has scary anger management issues. To think he is going to Afghanistan and hold a gun makes me cringe.
It seems to me you have enough issues with that nut job husband of yours that you don't need to be spending your time trying to control your mothers life as well. While your at it, stop holding your baby over her head to manipulate her. It's childish, mean, and just plain wrong.
Awful,atrocious behavior. Scary. I suspect you've seen that side of him before. No excuse in the world,nothing that can explain that away.Shocking. Not normal. You seem mature,intelligent and kind. Please for yourself and your child honestly evaluate your situation.
Ryan is a psycho I hope Vicki gets him out of the house! Vicki and Briana were both making ridiculous excuses for him, thank god they can watch this episode and see what really happened. Briana I'm so sorry if you don't think you deserve better than that. Lydia's mom was a guest in your home, is there a huge list of rules that say don't put your feet up? You should have been sticking up for your mom when Ryan was yelling at her but instead u justified everything he did.
Ryan needs to focus on defending our country from terrorists and such! Not defending a couch from a sweet woman!
Ryan is disgusting. He will be talking to you like that next... if he hasn't already. You could probably learn alot from his ex wife whoever she is. He absolutely made himself look like a little bitch. Actually it was sad. Dont care if she was 20 or 64.. she is a woman!!!! And you are acting like a total brat when your mom says she's gonna date Brooks. You need to move out on your own and grow up!
I truly hope Ryan will be apologizing for his disgusting behavior. I literally felt sick for Lydia's mom watching that scene and then it just kept getting worse with the anger, rude behavior and lies. Ryan is SO disrespectful! and he needs help for that temper... ? I hope you all recognize and acknowledge!
Your husband is a lying scumbag who LIED about what a old woman said. He is not a man but a child.
Watching last nights episode was tough and maybe you should watch it to see who said what to whom! Your husband looks like he is a loose cannon. I pray he comes home every time he leaves home, but I think the guy has some serious anger issues, that showed on the episode. He acts like he owns YOUR MOTHER'S HOME. I think you should go pay rent somewhere else and let your mother live her life.
wow! Total red flag by Ryan. I hope Brianna wises up and realizes he has a real and serious problem and makes him get help. I'm sure she does not want Troy growing up around someone who goes off like this. Best thing I ever did was divorce my husband because of his explosive behavior. To this day my son is eternally grateful that I took steps when he was just a baby and he did not have to deal with it growing up. He turned out to be a wonderful young man. It would be terrible if Troy grows up around this kind of behavior and then turns out to be the same. Please get Ryan help immediately or this will only escalate.
Wow, Ryan isn't honest or stable. Maybe he shouldn't have a gun, or be in the Marines where his lack of control could cause problems.
Your husband is scary, your defending him is scarier. Who talks to women like that? I already couldn't stand either one of you over your holding troy over your mom's head in order to control her. Threatening to move out if she dates brooks is sick. You two are a piece of work. I hope she throws you two out, but she won't because you will punish her by not letting her see Troy. Ryan's scary behavior is a huge red flag. WHO expect a controlling abusive a-hole behaves like that. There is no excuse for it. He wasn't "defending the house and family", he was abusing someone who he knows he can intimidate and bully. SICK!
Get your husband some help. If he is attacking a woman like he did Lydia's mother, then I hope you can see the red flags everywhere! A couch?! Seriously. If he had an issue with it, he could have approached the situation much differently. He seems to have major ego issues. If you're going to call out your mom for dating Brooks then I hope you can see your own situation with the same kind of clarity. The dude has issues. No excuse for that.
sugarcoatnsmoke I just saw that preview and I agree. He has major issues and he scares me. Briana is a self righteous hypocrite for the way she behaves towards her mom and her defense of Ryan.
Like mother like daughter... I always thought Brianna was different but she is just like Vicki -- self righteous hypocritical idiots!!!
Brianna I want to thank you for the sacrifices you two are making for our country. I think you, Ryan and baby Troy are adorable. Keep positive and continue to stay above the Frey.
ok this is obviously an old post! I doubt any of us think Ryan is a good Marine at this point! He needs some serious help!
I thank Ryan for his service and really think about the spouses left to hold down the fort while their soldiers are away. I am the Mother of a service member and if you haven't had a loved one deployed you can't even imagine the daily stress. I can't imagine going through it as a new first time Mom and one with their own medical issues. You have to take care of yourself and your family and keep outside stress to as much a minimum as possible.
Sponging off mom, holding the baby over her head, telling her how to live her life..hating Brooks for no good concrete reason, even your husband telling Vicki what she can and can't do in her own home, gawd you people make me sick!
No, she should just be a "YES" person, and accept the passive aggressive, manipulator Brook's as her new step dad. Please, she is Vickie's daughter and has all good intentions when it comes to her mother as well as her own child. I wouldn't want my child around that guy either. Briana is smart, and so is her wonderful and cute husband!
In fact, my favorite part of this show are the segments with Briana, her hubby and the baby! They are the cherry on top!
I have to disagree. I don't think Brianna is sponging off or taking advantage of her mother. She has said time and time again that she will move out if Brooks is in the home. How is that sponging? Obviously if she wanted to be advantageous she would 'demand' Brooks stay away and not ever offer to move out. I don't understand why this point is lost. Besides, Brianna is a nurse and very capable of taking care of her child financially, plus she is married to a man with guaranteed income and medical benefits for his wife and child. Military housing is also available to them so they wouldn't be homeless and out on the street. They have options and they know it. If the living situation is not comfortable for them with someone they are uncomfortable with, they have clearly stated that they would move out. I don't see how that is sponging. Besides, I don't think I've ever heard Brianna say she 'hates' brooks and she may not have a reason written in stone to distrust or dislike him, but maybe her gut instinct is telling her something is not right and as women we are told not to ignore that gut instinct, especially being a new mommy, those instincts are screaming right now and good on her husband for backing his wife on that.
They aren't sponging off of anyone. They both have secure jobs and have proven they are responsible. The only way for family to live together in an adult way is to have clear expectations and boundaries. They all have done that and if the expectations can't be met they are both willing to change the agreement. Sounds healthy and mature to me.
Everyone complains about Brooks. I don't know much about him. I do remember the wonderful Don you have on such a pedestal. On one episode he called you mother a bitch....on camera and in a crowd of people on a boat. That told me that he was pretty much garbage. Who does that? If he was upset with her, he should have waited till they were alone. She had done NOTHING to cause him to do it. It was pretty much out of the blue. I guess he forgot about the cameras and his squeaky clean image. So, is that the man you wanted your mom to suffer more years with?
Kids are hard complain all you want. Hopefully you can get a nanny some time being a mom doesn't mean you can't have help or free time if you can afford it. Brooke's is so creepy and I only see him on the show. I can't imagine in person. I'd keep my mom away from a creep like that too. I also see you love and respect your mom. She should respect you and Ryan it doesn't matter that you guys are staying with her in the house. I wouldn't want Brooke's around my kids either.
Is there something wrong with going outside? Going to a park? Using a baby stroller? What has happened to you? Where are your friends, former co workers? Anyone other than your mother to hang with. You've gone from young professional to stout mid aged matron in a matter of months. Soon we'll be asking what it's like to live in the prison of dependency on others.
I am tired of the complaining. You will get use to getting up with your baby and then everything will be fine or instead of complaining all the time why aren't you napping with the baby??
Best of luck yo you and your family!!