Alexis' and Vicki's Contradictions
Gretchen explains why she won't be friends with Aleixs and wonders why the advice Vicki gave to Heather doesn't apply to Vicki.
Hi everyone! I hope everyone had a great Mother's Day! I am so beyond blessed to have the best parents in the world and the most loving, strong, and amazing Mother! She has taught me so many important lessons about life and how to deal with it. In regards to this show, she always reminds me that all I can do is be true to myself, because what really matters are the people that know my true heart, like my closest friends and family. I'm very blessed with some of the most amazing people in my life and some fabulous fans!
The winery and hotel were actually so beautiful, and overall it was a very nice weekend with all the girls! Not a lot of drama thankfully.
Tamra had voiced to me several times how frustrated she was with Vicki and her non-participation in the wine club, which once I was up in the wine country with them I got to see it firsthand. I actually felt bad for Tamra because I know she was putting a lot of energy into this company and her "business partner" was not pulling her weight. I know intimately how much work getting a new business off the ground is and how much time, energy, sweat, and tears it takes. However I was sad to see this business get in the way of a possible reconciliation between them. I have experienced this firsthand with friends and it's not fun. It all seems like a great idea in the beginning until one person feels like they are working more and then it just goes downhill from there.
One thing I do find ironic though about this situation is that last year Vicki said that she thought it was a bad idea for Heather to go into business with friends and start a restaurant; however she doesn't listen to her own advice. This is why this woman constantly confuses me, she always has an opinion about everyone else's live but when she does it, the rules change.
When Lydia brought up Alexis at the table and said she missed me the most, there was a part of me that wanted to believe that was true. But her actions towards me have shown none of that. Here's a little insight to why I questioned that: I remember when Peggy and Alexis were not talking and fighting and Alexis reached out and texted Peggy when she heard that her daughter had broken her arm and said something like "I know things are strained between us but I just want you to know I'm thinking about your daughter." So in the spirit of Alexis always claiming she is that type of person no matter what, I guess I was hopeful that when she found out that Grayson was in critical condition she would reach out to us as well. But I was disappointed. I thought for sure if she reached out to Peggy over a broken arm she would reach out to us about Gray's condition. But instead she tweeted about it, which needless to say I was even more offended about. This gesture made me felt like it was more about her looking good to the rest of the world rather than reaching out to the people that mattered; which was Slade and I.
Unfortunately this was my experience with the friendship at times, and part of the reason I pulled back. There were contradictions between the way she was claiming she was living her life as a Christian and the way she was actually living it. I've had friendships like that in the past, and it just got to be too draining trying to understand what was real and what wasn't. Her stories and actions just weren't adding up, and I don't like questioning my friends. So, instead, I just decided to remove myself from it.
It was hard for me to watch the fight between Heather and Terry because I have never seen them like this. I mean, of course, they have banter with each other like every other couple, but this seemed to be a breaking point for Heather (which we all have, especially with our partners). However, I am so proud of them for sharing not only just the happy and perfect moments in their marriage. It takes a very secure couple to let you see into the hard times as well as the good times. Because we spend time with them, Slade and I know how much the truly love each other. They sincerely have a very loving, respectful, and great marriage. Terry is a major jokester and I just think in this moment Heather really didn't want him to joke. She really needed to know he had her back and was there to show her he was going to hold the fort down while she went and pursued her career again. That is understandable and an issue I think a lot of couples face. I think it was relatable and honest and I admire them for it.
I thought it was beyond thoughtful of Lydia to bring Slade and I a card from her and the boys regarding Grayson. Up to this point, I hadn't spent any time with Lydia and I thought it was a very sweet gesture and made me feel good that she was thinking about us during such a difficult time. I sincerely am sad I didn't get to know her more this season because of the junk we had going on in our lives. But hopefully I will get to spend more time with her and see if we click more.
One more thing I would like to address since it seems to be a question I keep getting. People ask why I was willing to forgive Tamra and not Alexis. First and foremost, I have forgiven Alexis because I had to in order to move on. However, the main difference between Tamra and Alexis is that Tamra apologized for the things that were said and the hurt that was caused, which is something that has never happened from Alexis. Tamra and I both said we were sorry for what went down between us and that we really wanted to move forward -- and we did just that.
I actually apologized to Alexis the very next day on the beach in Costa Rica for hurting her feelings, as that was never my intention. Alexis is actually the one that has never let it go, and even chose to make it worse by making the ridiculous accusation that I bullied her. She found it easier to blame me for being honest with her than to face the truth as to why she was being alienated from the group; which is OK, because it has become apparent that is the way she deals with things in her life.
Even Lydia tried to explain some things to her, but she was in complete denial and said it was almost impossible to get through to her. So it has nothing to do with not forgiving Alexis versus Tamra, it has everything to do with her actions since that day and how she continues to handle it all. Unfortunately, I just lost respect for her and her perpetual victim act. Honestly, forgiveness is the easy part, but going back to being friends with someone that questions your intentions as a friend, calls you a bully, never apologizes for it, then even after you apologize continues to not let it go, is the hard part. I can still wish a person well and choose not to have that person as a close friend anymore, they are two are very different things.
Lastly because some seem to be confused on this, one thing I want to make beyond clear is that my friendship failed with Alexis because of our issues, it had absolutely nothing to do with Tamra and our friendship. My friendships with all the woman are separate and work or don't work because of my experience with that individual in particular.
It's so fun conversing with you guys every week on my social media outlets! It helps me grow as a person and see things that maybe I need to work on. I truly adore my fans, (My G-Force as one fan called it, which I love!) You guys really do inspire me every day to be the best I can! Please visit my website GretchenChrsitine.com for updates of everything new and exciting that I have going on or to get my fashion and make-up looks you see on RHOC!
Love you guys and many blessings,