Tamra Barney

Tamra sheds some light on why and Vicki were so at odds in Malibu and shares what she really thinks of Alexis and Lydia.

on May 14, 20130

Sorry I have been MIA for the past few weeks. Between kids, CUT Fitness (Cutfitoc.com), Wines by Wives, and wedding planning I have been extremely busy. I hope you have been enjoying the season thus far. So much has happened since I last did my blog I don't even know where to start?

As you can see Lydia is a great addition to our group. She is sweet and caring and has little issues with anyone. . .YET!

Alexis and I are polar opposites and we find it hard to find common ground. I know kicking her out of my party was not nice. But after all it was MY party and I honestly had a hard time with her being there in the first place. So I asked a honest question: "Why do you want to be here?" I felt it was her opportunity to tell everyone that she wanted to move forward and everyone would have agreed with her. When the whole group is upset with you, its time to think about what you're are doing and fix it or stay away.

My friendship with Vicki has been strained for the past year. I love her like a sister and things do get better. Our fight last year has really taken a toll on both of us, and it became very hard to work with each other. Vicki is a hard worker and I could not understand why she wasn't taking a interest in WBW? As the season goes on you will see why.

1051 comments
pstar
pstar

Don't you get it Vicki is lonely she wants a special man in her life. All of you fail to see this .She wants love like 900 million other women . Yet none of you can understand this.

pstar
pstar

Tamara is the one you shouldn't trust she is deceiving and waitsto take a stab at anyone I TRULY BELIEVE SHE ENJOYS THE DRAMA

Beckyy
Beckyy

Tamara, pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease stop whining.  It is soooooooooooooo nerve-racking.  I would have left you ladies too.  You and Gretchen were the ones who decided to go to the bathroom and then go sit and sulk have the night.  It was suppose to be a party for you !

LadyDamselfly
LadyDamselfly

Tamra, stay away from Vicky.  She's a very insecure, nasty, selfish and narcissistic woman, she does not have your best interest at heart, it's always about HER.  Gretchen is a much better friend.  She cares about you as a woman and friend.  Tell Vicky to go kick rocks, PLEASE!  As your fans, we can all see it clearly...  Big Love to ya, can't wait to see your new show (congrats, by the way) and watch you marry the most wonderful man any woman in OC could end up with.  HUGS :)

bravogirl313
bravogirl313

Please stop running to everyone crying!!!!!!!!!!! I understand you wanting to share but now it just looks like you are using your issues to get someone to feel sorry for you. It also appears that you try to make everything about you, maybe to get that spinoff show.......Why Alexis would even consider meeting you is crazy when you act like a clown with everyone laughing at you and no one laughing with you and not to have them laugh to hide some supposed inner feelings  but to laugh at you bc your absurd. You used to have class on the show ...What happened?

Cherrie49
Cherrie49

All I can say is tamra really knows when to turn on the tears,

Barbarajean
Barbarajean

Please don't trust Vicki. She has an ulterior motive. She wants to ruin your relationship with Gretchen. She can't seem to be content with sharing you with anyone. She is going to be mean and vindictive so be careful. She ruined your marriage to Simon so watch how she handles Eddie. BE CAREFUL.

tricia.l.edwards.1
tricia.l.edwards.1

Congratulations to you Tamra for finally starting to grow as a woman and as a human being!  It has been sad but wonderful to see you "owning" it!  Good luck on all of your ventures!

Maine49
Maine49

I hope you really try to mend things with Alexis, just like anyone she wants to be liked. Gretchen really doesn't like to share does she. Mexico was about you not her or her issues with Vicki. Who knows who her new bff will be next. congrats on you wedding.

bravogirl313
bravogirl313

hope you spend more time with Vicki bc everything about you has gone down hill since you been friends with Gretchen......

piperbeau
piperbeau

Gretchen totally ruined that weekend get away!! Can you blame Vicki for wanting to get the hell away from Gretchen??!!

cbennett1
cbennett1

For what it's worth, it was good to see you, Vicki and Lydia having a great time together for a change.  It was like watching you and Vicki from the old days when you had a great friendship. That was good to see, I miss that.  The other ladies did not want you to have a good time.  I hate to say this but they are boring.

Goochgirls3
Goochgirls3

Dear Tamra I wish you all the best in all of your business adventures. I love you on the show, you are my favorite.I understand completely when you talked about not knowing how to handle a situation like when you called Vicki the b word.i do the same exact thing an it drives me crazy! Through the little bit of therapy I have had I discovered it is partially due to our similarities growing up and not really having stability an having father issues. I would love to see you in a movie.i think you have what it takes.....definetely! Well for my fist post I think I have said enough for now. One of your biggest fans Peggy

Bellamomma
Bellamomma

I'm so glad that You, Vicki and Lydia went off to have some REAL fun. I, and everyone else I know, HATE the BFF relationship between you and Gretchen. It doesn't seem real. You and Vicki were REAL, and if you look back on the past episodes, you'll see that you seem to have so much more fun with Vicki. I think it's killing Vicki that you're not BFFs anymore, and that her place was taken by a fake phony biotch, but at this point, I feel that she's willing to share you, just to be close to you again. Now THAT is real friendship. Gretchen was more mad that you were with Vicki, than the fact that you left, and had real fun. Lets face it, what she planned was boring and lame, so you went out and FOUND your fun. It was YOUR party, so why wouldn't you want to get plastered, and wear lit up bows, lol. I also commend you for making peace with Alexis. I truly love her, and I think we all have our own inner demons we have to deal with. I can't wait to see how Gretchen treats Alexis now that her puppet master has called a truce. I don't mean that in an insulting way, but Gretchen will do whatever it takes not to be on your bad side. She's been there, and frankly, I think she's afraid of you. She knows she has no win with you if you two were to have a falling out. Anyway, I really just wanted to say, I'm proud of you for being so cordial to Alexis, and I really DO hope you two can even become real friends. Life is too short. Don't allow yourself to have regrets. Be yourself, love who you want to love, be friendly to everyone who is nice to you, and keep your eyes open for people who use you as a stepping stool to try and climb above you. I think I can really love the new SWEET Tamra.

Justme3000
Justme3000

Why the friendship with Gretchen? Help me understand? 

petras
petras

it's your party not Gretchen's  love the mickey ears !!!!!

southernfried
southernfried

It's so rare that you say ANYTHING remotely worth listening to.  But when you commented about your boring bachelorette party, "What's next, a yeast infection?", I laughed out loud.

JenTeamTre
JenTeamTre

You could help people like you if you came out against Lauri and what she did to Vicki!!! 

McCourt
McCourt

Did we see some of the old fun Tamara tonight? I say yes and hope she stays for awhile. It was nice to see Gretchen taken down a peg sitting in that limo. I actually felt a little bad for heather because I think if she was told you were going out she just simply would have gone back to the hotel - no big deal. Gretchen would have complained and started drama. Great idea to cross promote your businesses....stay out of the drama and keep focused.

Pearl21
Pearl21

I'm 16 year old girl and I've had serious depression. I used to love this show it actually made me happy. Now? I think you are a liar and a bad example for girls. You make me lose hope in overcoming depression because all you do now is scream at people. You are so hateful and you know it. You are smart an you realize this. Deep down you know you are a fraud, a liar, a disappointment to your fans and most importantly your children. Deep down you know you will wake up one day alone, unhappy, old, and you wasted your life hiding yourself and the monster inside you. You know your fears are real and your years have past and those tears are all a lie. You know you had to become friends with Gretchen because you are a decaying old woman and would become irrelevant without the younger girls. You know you are jealous of Alexis, you admitted the first season she joined when she was sitting at your pool playing with her kids and bikini. You know you are not loved. Why haven't you been the center of hate on the rhooc? First you hated Gretchen then Alexis then Vickie. You are an old wrinkly Regina George and I can't wait for the tables to turn on you. Be afraid of your future.

Dimondgirl
Dimondgirl

I agree with Nene, except I would take it one step further, look for a new location, maybe San Diego or San Francisco.  I am bored with Orange County and the current crop of housewives.  It is the same old, same old, we need new people with fresh stories.  I have also noticed that there are fewer internet bloggers blogging about the episodes, guess they are bored with the whole lot of them too.  Anyway, if I want to know what they are doing, I can always log on here to read how the viewers feel.

LiveLife
LiveLife

Tamra complains that her mother didn't tell her she loved her every day or that she never told her she loved her?  I find this is a very weak excuse for Tamras behavior many decades after she left home. What bothers me the most is there are many mothers out there that don't tell their kids they love them every day and there are mothers and fathers who never told their kids they loved them verbally.  There are many ways a mother and father expresses their love for their children maybe not verbally but in actions.  Every time they bought you clothing, fed you, kept a roof over your head, and fulfilled all your needs that is all a part of parenting.  Tamra herself says she was spoiled by her mother so why doesn't Tamra get that is how her mother showed her how much she loved her and just maybe too much if she was considered spoiled growing up.  Sorry but the pity train stops here and trying to lay this pathetic excuse for your behavior doesn't wash with me and from the sounds of it, many others agree.

OCMK
OCMK

I totally agree with Thor! You are such a mean girl! And now, you want us all to believe that it's because of your bad childhood that you are how you are? Get REAL! A lot of people have had a crummy childhood (myself included), But, there comes a time when you have to overcome that and become a better person for that. I can't feel sorry for you, Tamra. You really do have a lot of problems. You also really like to gossip. I cannot believe that you spoke with Heather about the way Gretchen was acting during Heather's debut. Maybe Gretchen was out of line with Slade but she is supposed to be your BEST friend! You shouldn't have even brought it up to Heather-- unless of couse you're into gossip. You have anger issues and you need to tame those. I'm glad I'm not one of your "friends" and I'd be scared to get on your bad side.

ijustkeepwatchin
ijustkeepwatchin

Tamra you are just crazy, and not in a good way.  How would you like it if one of your children was ever spoken to the way you have spoken to Alexis or any of the other wives in prior seasons?  I bet you would know how much that would hurt them, and not wish it for anything.  You leave a destructive, hurtful path behind you.

chaitanya
chaitanya

Reading these comments is really interesting. I wonder about why you haven't blogged about the last episode. Is it the negative feedback your getting? Well I am happy you have a man to love and love you back and I agree that you need some deep inner reflecting about your behavior towards people. Hate and rage expressed or not is very unhealthy. Becoming angry when someone harms you can be understandable.  What you display on t.v. is some very inappropriate hateful behavior. Maybe your giving a speech truly was a healing avenue for you. God bless you and yours and may you find inner calm and peace.

Marjenchr4
Marjenchr4

Tamara Was I the only one NOT moved by your speech??? I felt the timing was so convenient after everyone is seeing you for your true colors you do this speech hoping to enlightin us all and excuse you for your mean girl behavior. What a bunch of BS. I couldn't stand you before n now it's even worst you and your fake crying needs to just go away!!!!

Thor
Thor

Really? You are just figuring out now at age 45 that you have a problem with communicating? This never ever crossed your mind years ago? Oh I don't know maybe when you were having problems with all the other girls that have crossed your path that you have verbally gone after as well as Simon. You never once thought that you might be the problem? Of course not... It is always the other person that is problem. I don't think you are fooling anyone with your speech about your childhood and all the other crap that came out of your mouth. One thing that you are correct on is that you are VERY insecure. You acted like a little kid getting up on stage with your nervous laughter, not a strong woman that you think you are. I bet Eddie's relatives can't wait for you to join the family.

erica8123
erica8123

It's been over 2 weeks!  Can we get a new blog? 

I understand that life gets people busy but even just a paragraph would be appreciated

Bee-Bee
Bee-Bee

Tamra I was so moved by your speech on the last episode of the Housewives and I was crying too, I can only Imagine what you went through all these years and I wish and hope that you can finally put everything behind you and start being Happy, but I also would like to see you get help for your Emotions, it would be good for you and other people around you.

I like you and other ones on the show, the only one I do not like anymore is Vicky it is so sad that she changed so badly in one year, she was always so funny and concerned and now its all about Brooks and as we all know ....He is no good for her at all.....15 minutes of fame and he is so fake when he is with Vicky, I do not understand why she can't see through him at all, he is a smooth talker and he is a user and it is so obvious and I think Vicky is so blinded by Lust and afraid to be alone and not Happy without a Man....It is sad to see your guys friendship just flying out the window like this. I hope that both of you can sit down and talk it out and maybe or maybe not you can be friends again....Best of Luck Tamra :)

anibritt
anibritt

As someone who grew up in domestic abuse it can be too easy for us to be verbally and emotinally abusive to others.  We can only hope that we catch ourselves and can apologize appropriately.  Sometimes we try so hard to never let anyone else ever treat us that way that we overcompensate.

 

Unfortunately, I feel that as annoying as Alexis can be with some of her comments, it just doesn't justify how you, Gretchn and Heather have been treating her.  Everyone wants to be heard but no one is listening.

 

Mean behavior is never attractive, appropriate or acceptable.

 

I wish you the best of luck and hope you take a long look at each of your friendships.  Friends don't fuel a situation and unfortunately, I feel Gretchen is just joining in.  Maybe she is just happy that someone else is now the target of negativity.  I'm not stating that Alexis doesn't need a frank discussion but how you and your friends are going about it is overly aggressive.

piperbeau
piperbeau

Tamra I would think after such a serious topic / episode you would have written a blog?!

latoyaholmes1221
latoyaholmes1221

 @Barbarajean

 I Don't know, the way Gretchen was acting on the next episode it seem like she doesn't want Tamra being friends with ANYONE!

tlanderson354
tlanderson354

 @Maine49 Ditching somebody is not cool.  I would be upset too.  They should have waited until the other ladies finish using the rest room, then ask them if they want to go along.  

DrTruth
DrTruth

 @bravogirl313 I hope Tamra, Lydia, Alexis and

Gretchen spend more time together.  I see a positive

energy bubble forming with that group.

Take a close look at Vicky.

She is a divider.

Lydia is a uniter. - Positive Energy -

 

tlanderson354
tlanderson354

 @petras I know it was Tamra's party.  But the other ladies planned it for her and put a lot of effort to make it happen.  Saying it was her party is just to self-centered.

Fayeth
Fayeth

That statement may have been prophetic.  Have you seen the clip of next week's episode with the strippers?

southernfried
southernfried

Thank God for Vicki, right?  She saved the whole dang party from a fate worse than death.

LiveLife
LiveLife

 @Pearl21

 Pearl I agree with what you said about Tamra but if you have had or are having depression please go immediately to someone you trust so you can get professional help for your depression.  Don't let Tamra's choices make you give up.  What she has done with her life is HER choice but don't let that affect YOUR choices.  Get help now because it will make everything in your future different and more positive if you take action now.  Maybe if Tamra had gotten professional help for her issues many years ago she might be a better person today.  Since she didn't she has been on a roller coaster with hating and attacking people all her life.  Please get help now because if you do you will have a much better chance on a brighter future.

ilcntrygrl
ilcntrygrl

 @OCMK

 Just proof that Tamra has not changed.  She is just turning on someone new.

ilcntrygrl
ilcntrygrl

 @Marjenchr4

 I so agree!!!!   She is not a child, to blame her actions on her mother is reprehensible.

 

WilliamSue
WilliamSue

 @Thor I didn't fall for her speech either.  Excuses, excuses, excuses.  Are we supposed to suddenly forgive Tamra for her bad behavior?  Sorry, the viewers are not idiots!  I'm so tired of Tamra - she brings new meaning to the term, "Trailer trash."

TulaneMom
TulaneMom

 @erica8123 She (along with Bravo) doesn't want  to hear (or  care) what the viewers have to say .

If Bravo listened to the viewers,  she would have been terminated instead of being rewarded with a 'wedding' spinoff.

 

softtail06
softtail06

erica8123 I'm sure Tamra ia waiting for next weeks episode to air so we'll all see how wonderful she is when she talks to Alexis. Her timing is really bad. What she's doing is really self serving. I am finding it amusing how she's turning on Gretchen. Gretchen talks about how awful Vicki was to her and Slade. She needs to go back and watch the reunion shows and see how awful Tamra was.  I also find it interesting to watch Tamra's mother before, during and after the "speech". It all looks like news to her (you know "love" being a 4 letter word) and she's just going along with it. For a woman who has been in bad relatioships most of her life, I wouldn't be jumping into another one so quickly. Whatever happened to just being single? I find Eddie controlling some times. I think Tamra likes it that way.

indyswim
indyswim

 @erica8123 I think that will be her excuse. She's too busy stirring the pot between the entire group. 

bravvofan
bravvofan

 @DrTruth  @bravogirl313

 I totally agree with your comment here. I also think it is possible that Tamra might have thought the girls were up to something when Vicki encouraged her and Lydia to go on without the two organizers, like some bachelorette surprise or something. That is what I was wondering at first, until I saw the two in the limo. But NOOOO, it was just Vicki being Vicki. But, alas, there was ALOT of alcohol and no such confession from Tamra, so?????  LOTS of lessons to be taken there.

 

Vicki seems like a pretty good narcissist to me, unfortunately.

DrTruth
DrTruth

 @LiveLife  @Pearl21 Yes, well  said.

Tamra is still growing as a person and so can Pearl.

The only thing holding Pearl back is herself.

I wish her well.

CrazyKoolaid
CrazyKoolaid

 @LiveLife  @Pearl21

 Pearl,     Girlfriend.....if this reality(?) show educates you to find a more positive path, then follow that gut.  Take care of yourself FIRST.   The word "Hope" which you wrote is positive, GO WITH!    Leave  behind the other word "Lose" as it's not connected to Hope. Find comfort!

LiveLife - Positive comment! 

piperbeau
piperbeau

 @Happening  I kind of agree!! I guarantee she is going to write a book strong is the new skinny!!  She is trying way to hard to be Bethenny!!!!!!

FlutterBy
FlutterBy

@piperbeau @Happening Then she better stay both...