Tamra Barney

Tamara shares some secrets of her wedding and discusses Lauri's allegations and where she differes from Gretchen.

on Jun 18, 20130

Slade making fun of Lydia being too skinny was not nice. He seems to have a pattern of making fun of women -- not a nice characteristic in a man. Even if he was joking the part that annoyed me was his passive aggressive/reverse psychology. When he was caught he should have said, "I am sorry I was not trying to hurt your feelings." Instead he said things like, "We're all fat and shouldn't eat cheeseburgers, but you should." When she said you should make fun of women he again made a statement like, "You're a much better person than me." That kind of behavior drives me nuts. Take ownership for what you are saying and stop blowing smoke up her ass.

When I met Alexis for lunch I told her that we should keep things between us for a while because I didn't want any outside influences. I wanted to get to know Alexis and try and bond on things that we DO have in common and not dwell on the things that we DO NOT have in common. It was hard for me to tell Gretchen that I made peace with Alexis, and she really made me feel horrible when she heard I invited her.

436 comments
tiger111
tiger111

you use to be like that.so people in glass houses shouldn't cast stones.

rubydiamond
rubydiamond

Tamara,

I liked watching the show with you and Gretchen as friends.  You look like true friends.  I can't stand yours and Vicki's friendship.  I hope you and Gretchen patch it up.

SimplyBeautifulDM
SimplyBeautifulDM

Hi tamra, well I am totally loving your new attitude and moving on from the mean girl character, but you need to learn to stop letting Vicky take control of you, She is so strong minded that she over powers you, If she trully wants to be your loyal friend then as a friend  respect the choices you make in other friends, I trully did not see Gretchen be a bad friend to you, her actions are out of feeling left out, you were weak enough to walk away at your batchelorette get away and leave her behind as you and vicky and that new instigater Lilly went off to party!!! Was that you being a friend? you let Vicky take over and you become a mini Vicky attacking Gretchen think about it, you amend things with Alexis and you become a mean girl again with Gretchen, if she made mistakes thats being human but you are not her judge!! Vicky makes so many evil mistakes attacking who she can in order to be superior... Live and learn Vicky is not a true friend!!! 

irenesidley
irenesidley

tamra, you are the source of the problem between gretchen and vicki. you play them off against each other because you love the attention you get from them. GROW UP! you are a dishonest and disloyal person to both vicki and gretchen. one of these days they will figure it out and DUMP YOU!

irisheyes185
irisheyes185

Tamra,

Since you have not been so close to Gretchen,  I have totally changed my mind regarding the negative comments I made about you in the past.   You are " seeing the Light' and not afraid to say so.  It is a good thing that you have made amends with Alexis.   Gretchen is a bad influence and Slade is a pig. 

momo159
momo159

Congratulations on your marriage. Glad to see you've resolved past issues with Vicki and Alexis.

Susan19514
Susan19514

It should never be hard to tell a friend that you're friends with another person. That is such a clear indication that you were dealing with a controlling person. They love putting fear into people and making you feel guilty for doing what you want. I'm glad you didn't give in to her peer pressure. :o)

Jazz326
Jazz326

Malibu Country: I looked up the cast and I did not see Heather. So what gives are you two-faced or what. Vickie couldn't wait to jump on the band wagon. So is it each season the cast find someone to throw under the bus.

Nicole428
Nicole428

Tamra you are, and will always be, my favorite housewife!

badkitty13x
badkitty13x

Why are you always so nasty when you're hanging around with Icky?   She definitely brings out the worst in you, which, by the way, is very unattractive.   So now you're going to turn everyone against Gretchen again?     I think it's time the posse ganged up on you to see how much fun it is.  I was actually starting to like you, now you're back to your old self.  Very sad.

mmcruz5
mmcruz5

Congratulations on your wedding.

erstevens33
erstevens33

Tamra you're coming off two-face. You want Gretchen to forgive and forget but every chance you can stick it the Slade you do. It wasn't that serious and you know it. If someone male or female called you skinny you would grin from ear to ear. It seem like you're befriending Gretchen to stick a knife in her back. Where is your loyalty.

mommaxine
mommaxine

I'm surprised anyone is friends with Tamra after watching week after week all the crap she says on the show about others. And Vicki is desperate, she bad mouths Gretchen because she is jealous, jealous of anyone liking her and her beauty.  

krricha
krricha

Tamara....I love the "real" you.  You are a beautiful girl and have a good heart and I am so happy you are FINALLY owning who you really are.  I once again am a fan of yours.

texasgal78
texasgal78

I am amazed and dismayed by the level of venom and vitriol you, Tamra, have been receiving from the viewers. I have watched you from the very beginning and have nothing but the utmost respect for you. Extricating yourself from your marriage to Simon was painful for the viewers to watch but unimaginable for you and your young children. I watched the speech you delivered and saw the raw emotion, pain, and strength you conveyed. It couldn't have been easy. I love the motto " Strong is the new skinny." While I have not always agreed with the way you have handled disagreements with the other housewives it has been encouraging to see you extend olive branches to, first, Gretchen, and now, Alexis. Finding love with Eddie was nice to watch and congratulations on your marriage. As for people who accuse you of "trying to hurt Gretchen" by inviting Alexis, I saw it as a positive step in the right direction and it was and is "a day about you and celebrating the love you and Eddie have for each other - not one about Gretchen." I found it appalling and disturbing that Gretchen, in a committed relationship with Slade, would have the unmitigated gall to wear her deceased fiance's ring - what a slap in the face to Slade and a calculated way to turn attention to her rather than you. I also found it interesting that when Lauri chose to expose certain "truths" about Vicki she selected Gretchen who has a big mouth and a vested interest in hurting Vicki. You would have called BS on her statements. You are headed in the right direction and I wish you nothing but happiness in your marriage to Eddie.

Nicole1
Nicole1

Tamra,

 

I really don't have a problem with you and congrats on your marriage.  However I will say that you always feel the need to have one of the other ladies as the outcast of the group.  It's like you get bored easily and you need drama in your life.  I am seriously starting to think you get turned on whenever you have an argument with one of the ladies. 

scorcher
scorcher

You deserve to be happy. You have suffered significant trauma and need to address it. I was surprised and amazed when you revealed that you didn't know how to change. You seem to be moving towards a change. That's great. I hope you will see that Vicki is really symbolic of all the negative things in your life. She represents and replays for you, all the negative people you have had in your life. She is toxic. Move away fro m her and form positive relationships with people who raise you up not drag you down to their level.

bravogirl313
bravogirl313

when you stop putting yourself in the middle of the drama and stirring the pot you look like a confident beautiful women, but when you instigate and constantly seek attention you just look like an insecure old women using everything but her mind to keep a younger guy.

midnighttulip
midnighttulip

Why do you persist in trying to hurt Gretchen? Do you have any idea of the crap you put her thru? Not only are you a lousy friend, you are a lousy person. Borderline evil.

Fil007
Fil007

No Tamra,

 

The difference between you and Gretchen is that you assault people emotionally and verbally, leave them to bleed and move on because you've made you point, truthful or otherwise.  From the show, it doesn't seem like you really forget or move on with anyone you don't like.  Instead, like a lot abusers you move on and forget, because remembering would trigger guilt and true change and who needs that?  But, it makes for "trainwreck" reality show viewing so carry on.  Oh, and Eddie thought Gretchen possibly not going to you wedding dress outing if Alexis was there was, "just childish."  What did he think of how you treated Alexis your gym dinner party?  Now THAT was, among other things,  childish!

 

 

charnorm
charnorm

Tamara, you backstabbed Gretchen. She has been the only woman on the show who has accepted Tamara for who she is. Vicki, interferred with your other marriage and tried to control you and now you are letting her back in. Something is wrong with you Tamara. You are no ones friend. Gretchen needs to take a long look at your actions, because she used you to get back at Vicki and to make Vicki jealous. You really want to be friends with that loud mouth, mean spirited Vicki. You deserve what you get!  Run Gretchen and Heather, Tamara is no ones friend. She only likes kissing Vicki ass. Gretchen should have been in your wedding and not Vicki. Period. Your an idio!

charnorm
charnorm

Tamara, you still are a fool. Vicki influenced your other marriage and now Eddie has warned you about Vicki and you still let her back in. What is with you? Vicki likes to control you and you listen to her. The past show had you standing on your own and standing up to Vicki, but now that you have had her as your bridesmaid you have let the evil in again. Gretchen has been what a friend is supposed to be, and not Vicki. When Vicki starts interferring in your marriage with Eddie, don't forget he warned you. Your standing out has been enjoyable, but now you have let the Evil Witch in again. Do you have a Lon your forehead or do you have a V on your ass. What you allowed Vicki to do to Gretchen and Heather was low class, and you went along with it. She sat on Heathers bed and laughed because she had accomplished what she had intended to do and that was to mess up the shower Gretchen had planned and worked hard on for you. YOU LET VICKI CONTROL YOU AGAIN! GAY MARRIAGE IS LEGAL IN CALIFORNIA NOW, YOU SHOULD MARRY BIG VICK!  We are all going to sit back and watch her sabotage your new marriage, and you deserve it.

TargaryenDany
TargaryenDany

I love you Tamra!!! Don't listen to the haters most of them don't even know how to spell your name correctly.  Idiots.

catz1
catz1

Those of you who are rewarding Tamra with all your love, well wishes and admiration after years of horrific behavior on her part must be delusional to think she has really changed. Wake up! She needs customers for her new business as well as viewers for her nuptials airing in September. Tamra hasn't made it through a single season without being an instigator of extreme cruelty, and that won't change. Do any of you really think she would be your friend?

southernfried
southernfried

No, ma'am!  You are lying when you say that Heather is all that Alexis wants to be.  Heather is everything that YOU want to be.  YOU want to be like Heather.   You are a sad individual, making Heather out to be your god.  Ugh.

cc72704
cc72704

Congratulations!!! It is so nice to see you happy, relieved of stress & making peace all around. Since I started watching, I saw a likeness with myself & you, still do! Love how we both seemed to have found happiness and some sense of peace around the same time. Go us :)

I have to admit, I come onto these blogs when I cannot sleep, just to read what the viewers say. Some get a tad bit into this whole tv show; lighten up. We all have each of the characters in ourselves, whether great or not so great. That's ok, that's life. We learn together, fail together, laugh together and get on with life together. I believe that's what makes this show so great.

I still get teary eyed with the speech you had done at the Women's Leadership Conference, and you made me see some issues I also hadn't worked on or saw prior. Thank you for that, it truly makes me a better mother, person and friend to others.

Good luck with everything, Tamra, I'm rooting for you all the way! :)

Wanttosay
Wanttosay

Tamra, again I'm very happy for you, your husband and family, congratulations and I wish you all the happiness you deserve. However, I can't believe your pattern of having a friend, talk behind their back, make enemies with them, then somehow make up and ask them not to tell anyone. Which is exactly what you did to Gretchen - you guys vowed to be BFFs and gave each other a friendship bracelet and now you're trashing her while she's trying to protect you from Alexis, and yet you didn't bother to let her know that you made peace with her. You all just want to belong and don't want to be left out of the loop and wantto enjoy the wonderful things your husbands or partners afford you so you can have the great lifestyle you have ( yes, we know Vicki makes her own money) Wow, I'm so disappointed with you - and how catty you are when you are upset with anyone of the ladies... This show is just so full of haters and drama. Too bad,you waste so much valuable friendship time and what good you can learn, grow and share. Really? As you would say?

lynnwhitlock
lynnwhitlock

Tamra,

In watching the 100th episode you can see how far you have come from being a woman domineered by Simon to  one having a supportive partner in Eddie.  You have grown, gotten your life together and become a good example for your children.  Congratulations!  

tara.rodefferreuillard
tara.rodefferreuillard

I've had times where I'm so against you tamra but I'm liking you again! Be true to yourself, you're not so bad! Please dump Gretchen, she's a snake

ZeeB@424
ZeeB@424

Congrats Tamra and Eddie - M/M Judge!  So happy for you. Tamra, Eddie is a much better match for you than overbearing-dictatorial Simon. You are clearly yourself with Eddie- able to speak your mind, give your opinions (sometimes a little too strongly :>) and not be afraid of the ramifications. Eddie is not afraid to show his passion and love for you (nice trait in Hispanic men). Proud of you for leaving the past behind (toxic marriage issues) and start fresh. Stay focused on your new blessed union with Eddie; your chldren; and all your new business ventures. Take time for yourself whenever you can. And when time allows it,  re-evalute the toxic friendships with the other wives.  If you've played any part in hurt feelings or damaged emotions- be the first to take ownership and move on. I think the friendship with Vicki needs a serious autopsy. Her 'me first at all costs' mindset is exhausting and draining. She actually took credit for 'birthing the RHOC concept/show'- WOW!!! Did anyone correct her? Did Andy Cohen protest? Anyway, I plan to try your wines when my budget allows it.  Notice I said YOUR wines- just sayin.... Felicidades a Tamra y a Eddie!

hannah79
hannah79

I like this Tamra Judge.  I was not a fan of yours but you are slowly changing and evolving.

Congradulations.

SimplyBeautifulDM
SimplyBeautifulDM

 @badkitty13x I totally agree with you! I became pro Tamra as she was changing , and understood that she was against Brooks to protect Vicky, and this season she became that mini Vicky again!!! Shows how weak she trully is! A loyal friend is a friend to all her friends no matter what!!!

munstermom
munstermom

I totally agree!  Its too bad because I think Tamra is funny and can be a very good person at times but Vicki def brings out the worst in Tamra.  I think Tamra is the classic "mean girl".  She is way too old to behave this way.

roysgirl78
roysgirl78

 @badkitty13x

 KARMA is a b**** and I'm so glad that it's coming around to bite ICKY in the ass. LONG OVER DUE!

Uwishtoo58
Uwishtoo58

 @texasgal78 How is wearing a gorgeous piece of jewelry disrespecting anyone?  I am sure that Slade is mature enough to respect that Gretchen had a life before him

saleneb
saleneb

 @texasgal78 I agree with all your statements with regards to Tamra growing, however, i do think it is a step backwards with Gretchen...yes, she acted jealous and childish as it relates to Alexis but Gretchen/Tamra has worked hard to gain each others trust and.  Tamra seems to be practising old unserving behaviors in pushing meaningful relationships away with Gretchen and so easily influenced my toxic individuals.  I hope that she see's her part in how the once resiprical sisterly relationship that demonstrates all good relationships take hard work, was worth fighting for.  Good time friends are just that!

jaygreen06
jaygreen06

 @texasgal78 Don't comment when you obviously haven't been watching this silly show. And thank goodness it's silly and not real life.

piperbeau
piperbeau

 @charnorm Tamra didn't back stab anyone!! Well maybe Vicki a little bit... Gretchen is a cry baby!!  And if you want to talk about backstabbing what the f did Alexis ever do to Gretchen for her to turn like that?!! 

NakNak66
NakNak66

I agree she has grown so  much and has finally found her authentic self

Missydeb65
Missydeb65

Wanttosay I agree with ya, on everything. What I find so absurd and almost annoying is how Tamra wrote in her most recent blog saying "Biggest difference between me and Gretchen is I forgive, forget and move on. I do not hold a grudge."If the viewers have watched Tamra over the past seasons they have watched her go from being friends with Vicki and hating Gretchen, to hating Vicki and being "BFF'S" with Gretchen. She moves on alright ....She bounces back and forth like a damned ping-pong ball with ALL these ladies, and each time she nearly comes full circle from hating them, and then back to liking them, or visa versa. She has to claim to keep it moving because if she didn't, she wouldn't have a single friend in the whole damn world.

I see Tamra getting soft in front of the cameras now. She's got to keep it moving, forgive & forget (as stated in her blog) because as a viewer above named catz1 said - she needs customers for her new fitness center, also has the upcoming 'wedding nuptials' in September. If we can all be like Tamra and forgive, forget and keep it moving maybe we will all watch the new show in Sept. & go to her gym!! And as for Miss Laurie & her re-entry on to this season to destroy Vicki, "WOW Laurie, you are coming at Vicki hard core. I would love to see you get that fake ass, BOTOX SPRUNG smile wiped off your face!" If anyone deserves a smackdown, it'll DEAFNITELY be you!

angel22
angel22

@belleLA Eddie has been around long enough to know what he is getting into. I am not a big Tamara fan but I wish them the best. She can invite whomever she wants to dress shop and a TRUE friend would NOT react as Gretchen did

ZeeB@424
ZeeB@424

It's nice to see Tamra so happy and fulfilled on so many levels. Eddie seems to be more relaxed and secure than Simon the grouch. I love the fact that Tamra is able to be herself with Eddie and not afraid to speak her mind when he needs a 'spot check' - I hope they have a long and happy life together and that Tamra has time to re-evaluate her friendship with Vicki. Did anyone notice on the reunion special how Vicki claimed to have 'given birth to the RHOC show'? Yes, she actually took credit for creating the show- whaaaat!?! Another example of VG's attempt to steal the spotlight like only a narcissist can do. Ugh! Please  Vicki, leave the show- your time has come and long gone!

roysgirl78
roysgirl78

 @NakNak66

 If this is her "authentic self" then she has SERIOUS problems! SMH

Cox54R
Cox54R

 @angel22  @belleLA I feel that Gretchen was a bit confused on why Tamra invited Alexis  for wedding dress shopping. Did Tamra explain to Gretchen that she had a talk with Alexis? No, so all of a sudden Gretchen sees Tamra asking her to go that day and Gretchen was like what the hell? I think I would have felt the same way.

Gretchen  did show up so hopefully all ended well that day.