Cast Blog: #RHOC

Vicki's Hindsight

Vicki wishes she and Tamra's friendship had gone differently -- even if Tamra's still lying about her to Eddie.

All I can say is: "OMG -- Bad hair day" at Heather's party! And what the heck was I doing filming right after surgery? I really looked rough! Ugh that was hard to see now that it's almost six months ago.

The continuation of Heather's clambake was this week's episode. I think Heather put Tamra and I across from each other in hopes that we would take the time to at least break the ice and talk to each other. It had been nine months since I had seen or spoken to Tamra, and, although I knew it would be uncomfortable, it was time we finally talked. I missed Tamra and really feel awful on how we ended our friendship at the end of last year. It was good talking to her in the wine cellar and I'm hopeful it's the start of healing and mending the hurt that happened to both of us.

It's definitely been a really rough year for me, and that I can't deny. I tried to not burden anyone with my problems, and it's hard to hear some of them talk so nasty about me. If I did share everything I was going through, it would have fallen on deaf ears or they would hold it against me and so my thought was to just keep it inside and not "go there."  I wasn't looking for any attention by having my surgery, I was looking for an improvement. My doctor actually said that no matter who you are, we all could use a little "tweak" here at there. I was at the point in my life, where I figured "What the heck. . .why not?"

One of the ladies had said that I had my surgery done for sympathy or attention. It was actually done for ME. It was done nothing more than to try and improve my looks -- no different than renovating anything else. People do it all the time. But, unfortunately, mine was done too close to the show starting, and I was very swollen. In hindsight, I shouldn't have done it so close to our start of the season. I don't like the way I looked in the first several months of filming and am quite embarrassed about it.

So. . .if you have anything negative to say about it -- please do me a favor and refrain. I agree with you that I looked BAD! The fortunate part is now that it's been six months since the surgery, I have full movement of my face and mouth and most people say that I look just "refreshed," and can't really tell that anything was done surgically. Phew! Thank God.

The "Radio Slade" segment was a joke. Slade's sole purpose of being on the radio was to bash the Housewives and, for that matter, anyone else he felt compelled. He thought it was funny.I thought it was disgusting. For him even to comment on my looks at the party was very wrong. He wasn't even there, and it's obvious Gretchen came home and told him I had surgery. I guess Slade isn't happy unless he's making fun of a person's looks. Since when did he become so perfect? Stay tuned for more of Slade's wonderful comments on the other women as well. It's not just me. He simply thinks that by making fun of women is a "normal" thing to do. I, on the other hand, find it classless and rude. 

I don't know of anyone that can deny the fact that when life is tough it's tough. You try and put a "poker face" on to show your friends everything is fine -- however they can usually see right through it. For the past year or so, Brooks and I have had a ton of outside pressures that simply we didn't know how to handle and we went through times where we were not seeing each other or talking one another. That didn't mean we didn't care for each other, we just decided it would be best to cool it for awhile. What that meant was we were not in communication daily and I didn't bring him around the group. I was focused on getting myself healed from the inside out. I was taking time for myself and he was taking time for himself. I'm sorry if people didn't understand it, it was what we felt needed to be done. The truth of the matter is I cared for him a lot, loved him but we both were tired of all the negativity. I was tired of everyone telling me what I should do instead of me making the decision myself. Brooks is an amazing man, a caring man, and he became my best friend. We realized if we had ANY chance at all of making our relationship work, we needed to not only take a break, but also to be private and not to discuss our relationship with anyone.

I don't know if any of you have been in that place before, but it's really tough. I am 51 years old, and I know what's good for me and what isn't. I don't need anyone watching out for me. I will be the one who makes the final decision on my future. . .and God.

Having Troy, Briana and Ryan at the house prior to Ryan deploying was a huge blessing for all of us. I have been able to help them out so they can have their "date nights" and I've also been able to see Troy on a daily basis. I cherish those moments when we all are together in the house because I know that when Ryan returns from being deployed they will most likely be relocated.

Briana said it correctly -- the divorce, the elopement, the birth of Troy, my dating life, the house renovation and the daily pressures of Coto Insurance & Financial Services made my life really stressful. I wasn’t asking for sympathy, just understanding from my friends. I know with life there are good seasons and bad seasons, and unfortunately this past year was a rough season. I know that this was just a "season," and it would pass, but for my friends to speak so nasty about me that I was faking it or wanted attention was just awful to hear. I was damned if I told them everything and damned if I didn't.

Hearing Eddie say those nasty things about me in his kitchen was extremely hurtful. He obviously forgot the hurt that I went through with Tamra last year and it wasn't entirely my fault. I will take blame for yelling at her, but it was months and months of un-comfortableness between us, and it just reached a boiling point. When Tamra told Eddie about our conversation in the wine cellar, she did not share with him the truth. Instead she lied and said completely the opposite of what transpired. I thought we were breaking some walls down, however she didn't relay that to him, which was wrong in my opinion. Eddie heard only negative comments about our conversation from Tamra, instead of what actually was discussed. I just wish she had told him the sincerity of the moment. Instead she glossed over it and made it non-emotional.

I did everything I could with my friendship with Tamra to support her and her decisions when it came to divorcing Simon and dating Eddie right away. But when roles were reversed, she didn't support me at all. She really hurt my feelings, but if I could take back that night at Heather's house last year I would. In hindsight, I should have walked away and called her the next day, versus getting so upset with her in front of everyone. I am growing and learning to be better in how I handle conflict each and every day. Isn’t that what life is about?

I hope you all have a nice week, and please don’t forget to email me at info@cotoinsurance.com if you would like us to send you our free prescription discount card. Some of our recipients have been emailing us telling me they have saved up to 75 percent off their prescriptions. Please email us your name and address and we will send out the cards to you the same day.

Again, don’t forget to visit my website at CotoInsurance.com if you are in the need of any information on 401K rollovers, life insurance and for CA residents health, auto, home and business insurance.

Read more about:

Lizzie: Tamra Doesn't Fight Fair

Lizzie thinks Tamra's comments about her children were meant to deflect from her own problems.

Happy Labor Day!!! I am going to make this blog short and sweet. It’s a holiday and I am going to be spending the day with family in Newport wearing a Sun Kitten and a smile. I hope you all are having a great holiday weekend.

To be honest, the second half of the Reunion was hard to watch. I think it got too ugly. I am not going to insult any of your intelligence in explaining this episode. We all know that misery loves company, and "projection" is as easy to spot as a $2 dollar bill. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see that everything miserable that comes out of Tamra's mouth is a direct reflection of what is going on in her life. In my opinion, children are off limits. It's quite apparent that Tamra does not fight fair and when all else fails she will throw your kids, marriage, and even your body under the bus in an attempt to hurt you. We filmed the reunion for over 10 hours and after listening to so much ugliness my heart just couldn't take it anymore.

I do not regret telling Shannon all the things that Tamra said about her. Everything I shared with Shannon was something that happened and was said on camera. I didn't take anything and create unnecessary drama. I would do it again in a heartbeat and I would think my friends would do the same for me. I simply did not know the truth about Tamra. Danielle told me all the things Tamra said about me. That is why after my birthday I was so hurt by her. It's hard for viewers to understand because these things weren't in the show. She could have called me and said she wasn't coming. I called her after sitting on the bus for over an hour. The next day she made fun of me to Danielle, in addition to asking plenty of questions looking for negative details regarding my party.

On that one-year free membership to Cut Fitness: Let's delve into this shall we? I was the one that contacted Tamra days after my party. She did not contact me to give me present. I had invited Tamra, Eddie, Danielle, Joe, Heather, and Terry to the Kentucky Derby and Tamra was the only person that had not sent in the RSVP. It was past the deadline and it was getting borderline rude at this point. Tamra, in fact, was making fun of the Kentucky Derby and the charity event that would be hosting us to Danielle. So, I reached out to Tamra regarding the Kentucky Derby and she texted me back saying, "I want to give you a free membership to CUT for your birthday." Tamra knows I am already a member to a sports club and that was the last I heard of this "free membership." I never received any kind of certificate or card for membership. I suppose she thought I would have the gall to show up and say, "I got a text message from Tamra for a free membership!" It's almost laughable. Needless to say, I don't go to her gym and she didn't attend the Kentucky Derby with me.

There is nothing else to say regarding the Shag, Marry, Kill game that I haven't already discussed in great length in any of my previous blogs. I said the word "marry" and that's that. Tamra even glared at me on the way out of the Valentine's Party and repeated it. "Marry you?" Tamra has said multiple times she couldn't even remember because she drank too much and there are even text messages where she says it too. Her story changes continually, like the words that come out both sides of her mouth.

During the Reunion, Tamra said many more hurtful things that you didn't see. She went on to talk about my son Preston and my marriage. We all remember the episode in the park where Preston hit me on the head with his elephant. He was asleep in the car and he had a mini temper tantrum. He was three -- it happens. I would assume most mothers have had it happen at some point. In addition, my husband and I got in a fight on my birthday. I feel awful about it, yet it made us closer. I just wanted what every woman wants -- to feel special because of her man. I am a big time believer in learning from your mistakes and that won't ever happen again. However none of those incidents had anything to do with Tamra. But on her quest to hurt everyone, she managed to drag in some irrelevant topics. I know it's all to deflect from what's going on in her life and to make someone else look bad. . .but it does hurt nonetheless. My babies and my marriage are my life so I guess her goal was to attack the things closest to my heart because she can't fight fair.

I hope you enjoyed this season and I hope you had a fabulous summer!!! The fall is my absolute favorite time of year, so I say bring on football and cooler weather.

Follow Sun Kitten Swimwear on Instagram and Facebook (@sunkittenswimwear) and Twitter @sunkittenswim

Follow me on InstagramTwitter, and Facebook (@LizzieRovsek)!

Read more about: