The exercise in therapy was an interesting one – Jackie had them bring in a childhood photograph of themselves so they could connect with the vulnerability of childhood. Not surprisingly, the pictures evoked childhood patterns about food and weight. Joe's love of cheeseburgers may be less about cheeseburgers and more about dad. A photo of little Stacy recalled the cruel criticisms of a grandmother. Nikki's self-loathing was revealed in her characterization of her childhood self as the "little fat girl." When we see our own childhood pictures, we see someone who may be "pre-pain," who hasn't yet experienced hurts we know will come, who hasn't developed harmful habits.
Jackie and I keep trying to move these clients into the present – to be present when they exercise and when they eat. All of us have the freedom of choice, but we can only exercise that freedom if we acknowledge our past. At some level, losing weight means letting go of the past. The best way to let go of the past is not to deny it, but to invite it in, and see that it does not rule us.
Time for you to weigh in: Will the escalating tension between Joe and Shay come to an explosive head? Will Nikki's willingness to delve into her past pain help to extinguish her self-destructive patterns such as showing up late and treating alcohol as a food group? At this point – who do you think is going to lose the most weight?
What about you? What life lessons would you want to impart to the " 6 year old you?" When you look back at childhood, what lessons about food did you learn that you wish you could undo?
And I couldn't let the rice pudding thing pass. Figures that a client in a weight loss therapy group likened the psychologist to food (by the way – he's not that far off – I smell like vanilla and cinnamon). Until next week...
It looks like it was a hard week for everyone. I guess you really do have to be broken down before you can be built up. Hopefully as they begin to change their behavior toward themselves, they will improve the way they relate to each other.
So if the inappropriate "eye rolling" (and laughter) didn't go unnoticed, then WHY didn't it get addressed right there in therapy? It was disrespectful and HOW are people supposed to comfortably open up to each other? Now I understand why Jeanna is very closed off, for this reason of people's innappriate reactions...
Why didn't you control this behavior and situation?
How can you (or anyone else for that matter) sit silent when Jackie is verbally brow beating the weight loss contestants? Losing 1, 2 or 3 pounds is better than losing nothing. Most physicians advise a slower weight loss program. They didn't put the pounds on overnight, they shouldn't be expected to take it off that quickly. How can that be healthy? Her exercise program is brutal. I'm surprised someone hasn't had a heart attack or dropped dead. How many people have used her program with success and kept the weight off? We don't see contestants from past seasons. Most overweight folks suffer from low self esteem. Why doesn't she encourage them with praise?
Only Dr. RAMANI can get through Nikki!!! Without Dr. Ramani's group therapy, Nikki would not be broken down like that and showed her vulnerability and painful past. I have a friend just like Nikki, she's so obnoxious and rude, but sure enough, she had a painful past, too.
Now it is so clear that Nikki's inappropriateness, rude behaviors and alcohol abuse are all functioned as a mask to cover up her emotional pain. If you watch the bonus clip and next week's preview, it is obvious that Jackie and Dr. Ramani are getting through Nikki, slowly than we'd like, but surely, through both physical and psychological push. What they need is a push out of an authentic love and care, not inauthentic praise "oh, you are doing great," "you are not that fat," that only hold them back even more. You can see in the bonus clip even the group dynamic has been changing.
Let's give credit where credit is due. Dr. Ramani is awesome!! Sooooo frustrating that we can't get to see the entire process of her group therapy!! Can't get enough of you, Dr. Ramani.
Dr. Ramani deserves more air time. I would love to see more of the therapy sessions, because obviously her input is making a change with the people on the show. For those that make negative comments, you must remember that these hour sessions are being edited to only show a few minute snapshot. I think this show would be much more fun to watch if the therapeutic part of the weight loss process was being shared more and a little less "infomercial" for Jacki was being portrayed.