The drive from OC to LA has been a killer for me. An hour and a half in the car leaves me dragging, and the days are all starting to run together. I usually get home and go right to bed. You can tell that I am quiet and tired the first few weeks. That's if you can spot me. Most of the time I would just duck my head and workout, even my family had trouble finding me in the gym.
But by the third week of Thintervention things start to get a little easier for me. My body is starting to be able to do 30 minutes of cardio without quitting. I feel so much stronger and healthier already. Eating the correct portions and following Jackie's book, "This Is Why You're Fat," has really helped me. My energy level is really picking up!
I think next week when they all drive down to the OC to work out you will see a different Jeana. The days that my friend, Allan, can drive me and I can catch a nap in the back makes it so much easier. I get a lot of criticism about my friend and his role in all this. It is hard to make huge changes in your life on camera, and I admire him for taking the steps to get out of his own abusive relationship, and thankful that he can steer me through my own. I'm dating a few different guys and none of them are really right for me. They each do have something to offer, although Bryan's comment about my having rich men is laughable. My men may be rich in personality and looks, but no one supports me but me. Since I'm not able to continue dating three guys, I'll just wipe the slate clean and start over. I'm not willing to settle at this point in my life; I want it all. I am the supporting person in most of my relationships but I want it to be 50/50. I don't want to do all the relationship work anymore. Driving to LA for a date -- not happening.
Thanks go to Dr. Ramani for her help in my getting the strength to stand up for myself. It does seem, though, that dear Dr. Ramani knows just the things to make me cry. I am going to have to bring my A-game to therapy.
This week when Nikki was late (she only lived 5 minutes from the gym,) I assumed she was really ill. To show up drunk or hung over made me really sad. She really needs Thintervention. I don't mind that she gets a lot of Jackie's time, because she needs it. The rest of us just do our thing, the best we can, some with a little resentment (Joe) and hope we can escape the wrath of Jackie. The thing is, I can relate to Nikki losing it, being a mother of three rascals myself, and I just let it slide off me and keep working.
I stress again, it's hard to open up and talk about your life when you know you are going to see it replayed 1000 times.
Mandy and I are becoming a little closer, she is a special girl, and I am really enjoying our time together. Craig and I are also having a fun time together; we do after-hours one-on-ones to help him get in shape. I love his up-beat personality.
Next week's show is going to be bittersweet for me. One of the firemen, Jim Owens, died this week at 56, doing the same drills we do on our show. It is sad to lose someone so young. Heart diseases, heart attacks all can be prevented if you know your family history. I just went and had a CT scan of my heart to be sure everything is okay. I highly recommend it to everyone over 40. That and checking your insurance policies, health and life, yearly; put it on the calendar. When kids graduate, policies need to be updated. For me, Shane's change from baseball to college needed to be updated. Had a scare with Kara this week, went to the ER for extreme headache and back pain. She had a CT scan, and spinal, scary stuff. Thank God, she is fine.