I Am the Log. I Am the Ravine. I Am Scared.

It would have been interesting to see Clark Frasier speak up for himself.

Welcome back, my little banana yucca! Who knows what fabulous '90s film my recap title hails from? Leave your guesses in the comments below!

First, let me start by saying that I watched this episode about 5,000 times. Why?  Because this week we started our 11 p.m. interactive episodes. featuring behind-the-scenes tidbits, fun facts, and more -- so join us, won't you?

OK -- now on to the episode!

First, the Quickfire Challenge, and it's all about salad! I have to say salad is one of the most interesting dishes in the world because, well, you can do a lot of interest things with salad -- and frankly, they can be really unhealthy! Not to get all pretentious on you, but even Escoffier recognized the importance of salad and its dressings, listing five classic dressings and when to use them in his classic Guide Culinaire.

I've had some good salads in my day, but the one that I always come back to was created by former Top Chef Master Jonathan Waxman himself -- it's a farro salad he had on his Barbuto chef's table menu awhile back. Just delicious. But salads in general are a staple in most diets of those of working in Corporate America. Salads are all about the toppings for me -- I will literally eat every piece of lettuce so I can save my favorite toppings for last. Anyone else do that?So, the chefs got to work and came up with some pretty inventive stuff. And they were cooking for Athens Geogia's very own B-52s. Hugh Acheson lives in Athens, but we won't hold that against this legendary group. I love them. I also loved Brad Sherwood's dead-on impression of Fred Schneider on Whose Line is it Anyway? Who remembers that?!

Although the salads were all pretty inventive, a couple stood out. First, Lorena's. Art was worried about Lorena since she decided to grill cauliflower with only eight minutes. It was ballsy, but it worked because she won the challenge! Next, Kerry's. He decided to make a play on Salade Russe and everyone dug it. Finally, Thierry's. They didn't think they liked fruit in their salad, but they enjoyed his. And as I always say, the sign of a great chef -- to me --  is the ability to make people like foods they didn't think they did.

So, with her first Quickfire win under belt, Lorena and her fellow competitors move on to the Elimination Challenge at the Grand Canyon! In a lot of ways this episode reminded me of the Ellis Island episode of Top Chef. Like that challenge, the chefs were traveling to a place with a lot of history, but this time, that land was sacred and this time, they were cooking other people's history, not their own. uUt first, they had to make it to the area settled by the Hualipai tribe! And Takashi was afraid of heights. I love Takashi -- I just start giggling at everything he says because it's all so endearing. This time, I giggled when he forgot he was afraid of heights, but thankfully Chris Cosentino remembered for him! I appreciate that they know these types of things about each other -- they truly are friends.Thankfully, Takashi was OK and they made it to their destination, armed with indigenous ingredients and broken up into teams of two. Some of the teams seemed really organic like Patricia and Chris… Really, everyone but Kerry and Clark, who seemed to get off to a rocky start. As the chefs started cooking, they started getting rained on. Chris MacGyver'd that situation and created fire for his fellow chefs. It was almost a medieval moment.

And so, the chefs presented their humble dishes to their welcoming guests. It seemed that the team with the greatest chance of stumbling was in fact Kerry and Clark, even though they had the most ubiquitous ingredients. Unfortunately, their ingredients -- just like them -- couldn't marry together. And Clark paid the price for it. His elimination is a little bittersweet in that we can all take some sort of solace in the fact that he is going home to rejoin his partner in life and cooking, Mark. It would've been interesting to see what happened if Clark had spoken up, though.

Art and Lorena didn't let their overcooked quail get them down, and thankfully a delectable BBQ sauce may have saved them. No real complaints about Chris and Patricia's rabbit bits dish. But ultimately, Takashi and Thierry pulled out the win with a venison and banana yucca plate -- two ingredients near and dear to their diners' hearts.My favorite moment in this week's episode was one that a couple of the other judges mentioned in their blogs as well, and that was not only hearing the Hualapai talk about their food in a way they probably never thought they would, but also hearing them basically make fun of our judges for how they talk about food. Oh, the plight of the foodie. Tell me: what was your favorite moment?

Next week the chefs throw a pool party for none other than Ms. Holly Madison. I will admit that I was a regular The Girls Next Door viewer, so I'm kinda psyched. Until then, Have a Nosh!

Bryan Voltaggio: "I Thought I Won. I Know I Won."

Bryan compares his Top Chef Masters finale to his Top Chef Season 6 finale. How are you feeling going into the finale? Tired? Reinvigorated?
Bryan Voltaggio: Certainly not tired. This is something we do every day, day in and day out, cooking. Going into the finale, I am feeling excited and nervous -- I want to do a great job and win. What went through your mind when you found out Graeme won the last Battle of the Sous Chefs?
BV: I was very excited for Graeme because he finally had an opportunity to shine and he brought it all to the table. I felt a great sense of redemption for him because he got to win a challenge when it counted the most. I strongly believe that Graeme helped us get all the way tothe end-- he clinched it to get us to the finale. Can you elaborate on your menu planning? How did you decide which dish will go for which course?
BV: When it comes to the menu, and what I learned the first go round on Top Chef, you need to cook what you know. There are time limitations, surprises (planned and unplanned), so you need to do what you can to troubleshoot and get good results on the plate. You can't bring anything to the challenge that you've never done before. I go back to dishes we've created at VOLT, things that Graeme and I both know, things that I don't even have to speak to Graeme about. You had a little over 20 minutes less than you thought you would have to prep because of traffic. How nervous were you that you wouldn't get it done?
BV: Traffic was a big factor, but I knew the food, I knew the menu, and I knew I could get it all done. It was worth going to get the extra ingredients (the proteins), and it was worth it in the end. How do you feel each dish turned out? Was there anything you would have done differently?
BV: I was very proud of every plate I put forward. I thought that every dish was done flawlessly, and I achieved every goal I set out for. What made you include an element from Michael's repertoire in your dish (the seaweed mashed potatoes)?
BV: I wanted to put out some sort of element that represented Michael because he's not only family, but I also respect him very much as a chef. As the judges critiqued your food at Critics' Table, what did you think?
BV: I thought that I had nothing but positive comments -- there wasn't anything glaring that made me feel like I misstepped. I felt really good after Critics' After the heavy comment about your beef dish? Did you think you won?
BV: Yes, I thought I won. I know I won. What went through your mind once the critics told Doug he won? How did it differ from when Michael won?
BV: I thought for sure they were going to call my name because I felt confident about my food. Maybe they saw something in Doug's dishes that put it over the top. Compared to when Michael won, it wasn't a proud moment for me because I wasn't playing and rooting for both myself and my brother. I really wanted to win the money for my charity and it was an opportunity for redemption. If anything, I owed it to Michael to win because I wanted to compete again and go for the win. You are on a roll in our Viewers' Choice. Anything you'd like to say to your fans?
BV: I appreciate all the support, and the fans need to know that their efforts will go to feed many hungry children across the country. I encourage everyone to continue to reach out and support Share Our Strength. How's your relationship now with the other contestants?
BV: My relationship with everyone is great. We all got along, and I felt respected amongst the group. At first, they were nervous when I came in because I had competed before. That just goes to show that it was a tough competition, and we're all good at what we do. I still communicate with everyone from the group -- mostly David Burke. What was your favorite overall challenge?
BV: Favorite challenge was the last one. It is always best to cook the food you want to cook- that's where I've always put my best food forward. What was the hardest part of the competition for you?
BV: Being away. There are always two sides to it -- one of the greatest things when you are in a competition, all your focus is on that and not on outside influences. It's a break from the day-to-day restaurant life, but the other reality is that you want to be back home with your family and at your restaurant. Did anything funny happen behind the scenes that you can share?
BV: I had a lot of fun with the Face Juggler app behind the scenes. We were acting like children a lot of the times behind the scenes which kept the grueling schedule and challenges bearable. Anything else you'd like to add?
BV: I want to thank Graeme for everything and helping me along this journey. He is a big player in how we got all the way to the end, and I appreciate all his hard work day in and day out at VOLT.