Hugh Acheson

Hugh Acheson has found his soulmate.

on Sep 11, 2013

This sauce has reduced to Sang, David, Douglas, Jenn, and Bryan.

Daniel Handler is the guest Quickfire judge. He is also known as Lemony Snicket, and if you have kids aged 8-11, and I have two of them, you are well versed in his books. 

The QF is curated by the employer of the sous chef who won on Battle of the Sous Chefs. In this case it was Paul who won, and thus, Douglas is playing pantry raider. He knows that Sang admonishes people for loving America’s vegetable, ketchup, and thus, the ingredient is set. Catsup challenge it is. 

The chefs get moving and shaking on this condiment challenge. Sang is making BBQ sauce and playing hard to get as Douglas snaps a gym towel at him in the locker room. It’s nuanced, their love. David Burke is making something convoluted. Jenn is talking about growing up as she makes scallops. 

Douglas is the miso king. He talks about meeting the mustard miso master. I suddenly want some hot dog miso with a pretzel and a beer. 

Daniel Handler is a wonderfully loopy man who half of the world would think is just plain weird and off-putting, while the other half would regale in his eccentricity. Basically, I think I have found my twin, and what better twin to find than one who is a multi-millionaire best selling author. Call me, bro. 

Why Lemony has hid in anonymity we will never know. He’s hilarious and should have his own show. Curtis, representing the half of America confused by Lemony, has no idea how to react to him. Burke doesn’t either and is irritated by the “bizarreness of this gentleman.”

Douglas: Duck with ketchup miso and blood turnip

Sang: Fried Chicken with Japanese BBQ sauce 

Jenn: Scallop with ketchup and jicama

Bryan: Liquid Nitrogen with flavors of Sunday football

Burke: Pureed scallop sandwich and “that kind of stuff” 

Bottoms: Chef Burke, who has pulled Lemony into a netherworld of “karmic dread,” and Douglas with his angry condiment miso.

Tops: Blue Cheese Snow by Bryan and Scallops by Jenn. Jenn wins. Lemony leaves the kitchen. Call me, bro. 

The Elimination Challenge is wrestling Vaudeville themed. Obviously. Paul has gifted Douglas immunity. Sang and Jennifer’s sous chefs were bottoms, and Ted is still bitter. 

Wrestlers come parading in. I just listened to a NPR piece on Mexican Lucha where all the wrestlers are performers from the LGBT community. It was interesting. You should listen HERE.