Brian Malarkey

Brian Malarkey calls it like he sees it and has a special message for Leah.

on Feb 5, 2009

I had such high hopes for this season in NYC and all of the endless possibilities; finally Top Chef delivers with Eric Ripert as the host judge.

I missed last week’s blog because I was in Vegas doing a demo with Richard Blais at the NAPTE convention. I really didn’t have much to say about the “NYC All-Star Challenge” except I was really happy the current season won. That was a far cry from being the best that Top Chef has produced or highlighted out of NYC. Without Hung and Harold in the mix we had just a bunch of early elimination characters, great characters that we will always enjoy but still not the all-stars that should have been represented. The fact that Carla won or at least I think she won was like the Detroit Lions getting a really easy season against a bunch of Pop Warner rejects. 

This challenge highlighted cuisine that is of the highest echelon of our country's dining scene.  I of course have a hard time with Chef Eric Ripert because he’s the one that sent me packing my knives in the mountain of Aspen with the cowboy challenge, but I will and will always have the greatest respect for someone like him with such (stealing Hung’s line) Style, Grace, and Elegance ….

Breaking it down like the cheftestants in the Quickfire Challenge: It's impossible to reproduce one of Eric Ripert's dishes that he has worked on for years in two hours after having only tasted it moments earlier. One more thing from my eyes-only: I swear that Padma has the biggest crush on Eric Ripert. I saw it in Aspen and I saw it again on this episode.

The Malarkey Power Ranking:
1. Stefan - Wins the Quickfire and the Elimination only solidifies him as the “Top Chef” of Season Five. This guy is fierce with his lobster and asparagus reproduction. He refers to skinning an eel like riding a bike. Awesome display of confidence. Such a hard-edge competitor. I heard a very accurate rumor that he spends his time in nail salons as a means of relaxation. This self-described pretty boy with the shiny dome will be traveling with Eric Ripert this summer. Should be able to buy everyone cold beers with his $100K in pocket. 

2. Hosea : “The Seafood Guy” - I am really good friends with the guys who own the rights to “Who’s your Daddy” and they want your address to collect their copyright violation dinero. I was the seafood guy from my season and I had no idea that you are supposed to let Monkfish rest before slicing it. I always do medallions. Obviously it's going down to Germany vs. USA in the World Cup of Top Chef and I am beginning to think USA might actually have a chance.