Hugh Acheson

Hugh Acheson assesses how the chefs, especially Josie, deal with time constraints.

on Dec 19, 20120

Here we go yo. 

The Healthy Choice $150,000 is still mysteriously hidden in the freezer section of the Top Chef kitchen and none of the remaining chefs have noticed. 

Stephanie Izard is in the house. She is the winner of Season 4 and a very successful chef in Chicago. She has curly hair that makes mere mortals envious. Someday, it is ordained, she will take my brow and I her locks. Kind of like trading our signatures for a couple of weeks just to see what’s up. She has yet to be informed of this plan, but I am thinking she’ll be totally cool with it. 

Foiled again. Open up the food stuff and you have to use it. And you have to cook in it. The Bart Knight? He likes this. Stephanie plays up this angle stating that she loves foil. Tesar is totally flummoxed by a pineapple… “WHAT AM I going to do with a pineapple?” Obviously boiled beef with pineapple thingies comes to mind. Hmmm. 

Beautiful Kristen is channeling a sponge cake which ends up being one of those things that may taste good, but looks like it was, well, cooked in small bundles of angrily scrunched-up Reynolds Wrap. Meanwhile, Bart is making a foil helmet to channel his home planet. Tesar is contemplating that all Asian food is anchored with pineapple. I am lost in my own foil outfit, cause I like to play along at home. 

Micah would like you to know about his gift. His gift is that food ideas just come to him like an indescribable miracle. Most people would call that getting paid to be a… wait for it… chef? “I am a tax accountant and I have a gift, a miracle blessing among mankind, 'a super power’ if you will, to do your taxes.” I keep expecting to look over and have Bart making a life-sized Noah’s Ark with two of each animal, all made out of FOIL.

14 comments
franci
franci

Wondering if you were not a stand up comic in a previous life

beverlyhillsaddiction
beverlyhillsaddiction

you have the most personality of the top chef judges.  best remarks- subtle but witty.  

corydon
corydon

Does anyone else think Danyele has anxiety? I know Top Chef is stressful but your nerves are holding you back Danyele.

lindaberglund
lindaberglund

Chef Hugh, your dry caustic wit is a hoot..Thanks for the entertainment.. This is better than the tortilla soup I just made!

girlwiredin
girlwiredin

"Kristen giggles and the innuendo between them continues like a pesky form of herpes."  Simply, awesomely hilarious Hugh!!  These two kids are so cute, its making me sick!  LOL

jelliebean
jelliebean

Wow you are a great writer and very entertaining. Now I am going to spend an afternoon reading all your blogs when I really should be out doing last minute Christmas shopping. Dang you Chef! 

Boack9ay8c
Boack9ay8c

Great episode, but what the fruitcake is going on with Stefan and Kristen?

 

rnkat
rnkat

To many laugh-out-loud moments to count.  Home run, sir.

TondalayoSchwartz
TondalayoSchwartz

 @jelliebean I did that last year when I discovered this treasure-trove of wit.  How had we missed it.  Where is the Top Chef publicist?  Give this man a book deal.  If half of the  Bravo housewives have book deals...Hugh certainly should.  Combination recipes and blog?  I want credit for the idea.

 

TondalayoSchwartz
TondalayoSchwartz

 @randypenn Stefan is acting inappropriately. He's done this before.  Kristen is a beautiful young woman trying to win a competition and not make him an enemy.  She is being harassed.  Not good.   I think her giggle was a nervous one, not one of amusement.