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King Hosea

Brian Malarkey tells it like it is about the finale.

By Brian Malarkey

I really thought Stefan would bring the title of Top Chef home to California but the man from the Rocky Mountains of Colorado skips the sweets and wins with venison and the magic of the Sorcerer Richard Blais. Casey crashes Carla and Marcel and Stefan looked like water and oil.  After reviewing the menus of the bald boys I am still a little confused by the judges' decision on the relativity of dessert. Hung won my season with an '80s inspired dessert garnished with the random raspberry and Dale lost with duck fat poached lamb that was out of this world. For future contestants and viewers know this about Top Chef and the judging: “Nothing is ever consistent.” 

I’ve had a great time ranking the contestants of Season 5 TC NYC and I want to thank all of you for your insight and insults. They always say if you dish it out you better be able to take it.  To all of you of you 61% of voters who picked Carla as the Top Chef in the voting I humbly apologize to you and Carla not giving her the respect you feel she deserved. She made it farther then I did and will probably be one of the most successful contestants ever to appear on Top Chef. The trophy is not the title or the 100K — it’s the notoriety and endorsements that come with playing a good game and she certainly achieved those beyond my wildest imagination. Her hootie-hoos and sound bites were in the end the most enduring part of this season. The Wizard of OZ that was this season: Carla the cowardly lion found her courage, the tin man Stefan found his heart by comforting Carla in the end and Hosea the scare crow used his brain and stayed away from the desserts and pick the best sous-chef to take home the gold down the yellow brick road. For fun let's call Tom the Oz and I can’t imagine a better Dorothy than Gail Simmons. Sorry Padma but that leaves you as the wicked witch of Top Chef for sending everyone home.   

The best part of the dinner was Gail rolling her eyes at Rocco for his confession that he was “tired of eating foie gras” and Branford Marsalis laughing at him.  

Another great season of Top Chef with a lot of great characters and chefs bringing us endless hours of entertainment, lets see what Andy can dig up in the reunion next week. Until then let's reflect on TC5 NYC with our favorite memories or moments of the season. Mine was Fabio saying, “This is not Top Scallop, this is Top Chef”!  Awesome! And that is why Fabio has my vote for Fan Favorite but I think it’s going to be a tight race between Carla and the Italian stallion! 

One more thing Hosea: Call me and I can give you Richards address so that you can send him a little present, maybe 10K, just a thought…..

Cheers!

How to Watch

Watch Top Chef Season 21 Wednesdays at 9/8c on Bravo and next day on Peacock.

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