Anthony Bourdain

Anthony Bourdain thought this episode would suck, but as he admits, he was wrong.

on Dec 21, 2010

As the tension mounted, The Artist Formerly Known as Angry Dale doubted Carla's spicy peanut soup. But she persisted. Then she neatly whacked off half her fingernail. Let me tell you, I've had the same injury on any number of occasions. And that f---ing HURTS. But Carla, unlike the previous patient, tells the medic to shove off, wraps her finger up and soldiers on -- referring to her wound as "an inconvenience." I need not pursue this subject, I think. Res Ipsa Loquitor. The thing Speaks For Itself. Carla? Rottweiler. Jamie? Malingerer.

First match-up and suddenly, Jamie refuses to even go in the tank for her team. Her chickpeas aren't cooked. As anticipated, she has nothing to serve. According to Spike's master plan, she was supposed to take a dive, but now, she doesn't even manage to make it into the ring to take one for the team. It doesn't matter. Fabio triumphantly beats Casey with his gnocchi -- taking what looks like a victory leap over the net. Nice to see Fabio so unabashedly happy for a change.

Tiffany F. whupps No-Longer-Angry Dale by a mile.

Marcel, dutifully doing the producer's bidding by jacking up the drama quotient in confessional, describes walking out on the tennis court by saying he "felt like a gladiator entering an arena." To which I'd suggest, "Not in that jacket."

Angelo, whose mackerel has gone mysteriously slimy, tries to beg some salmon off of Tre, who wisely rebuffs him. He then edges Marcel with some borrowed tuna -- possibly because Marcel has chosen to put cream in his tuna dish.... Other than vitello tonnato, I'm having a hard time thinking of a tuna preparation that is improved by the addition of cream. But I guess anything is possible.

Tiffany Derry falls to Antonia -- who I like more than ever since her remark early in the show that her chosen sport in high school was "smoking a lot of pot."