Hugh Acheson

Hugh Acheson weighs in on the team dynamics in the Salt Lick BBQ challenge.

on Jan 4, 2012

This looks exhausting. Tom drops by to check on the teams. Everyone seems pretty wiped out. Grayson says its going to be like “sex in the mouth.” Really. She did. Tom announces that the winning team gets $15,000 and Edward is splitting that $7,500 for, him $7,499 for Ty-Lor, and $1 for Sarah.

Medic time. They are calling the 911. Edward thinks that sick people should just try harder to be better and healthier. They are now a two-man team and will be cutting this meat in advance and then packing it up. Edward decides that the most efficient way to set up is to throw shit around like you’re four years old. These people are tired and cranky from lack of sleep, but really Edward... "What’s really hood"? (I had to look it up in the Urban Dictionary the first time too.)

Chris Jones is wearing an, “I EAT VEGANS” shirt. I am hoping this helps because he is on the Bad News Bears. 

Blue Team gets judges first and the murmurs are that the chicken is delicious, the ribs are great, and the brisket is underseasoned/phenomenal. Opinions opinions. 

White Team gets good marks on their “roast” chicken, beans are undercooked, ribs are salty, and their brisket is juicy yet underdone. The watermelon agua fresca could use some gin (for Gail) or tequila (for Salt Lick owner). Nathan, who has taken one too many Miracle Berry tablets from the basement stash, cackles, “Bite your tongue Canadian.” Gail and I will not take such mockery of our native land. 

Sarah is back in the land of the living, but Edward doesn’t let her back in the gang. This is brutal. To say that they are not getting along is a vast understatement. Ty-Lor is showing true compassion and well Edward is poo poo-ing all the way to the end. Sarah is going to drink some guilt-free water. The judges think their chicken is great. The flavor of the ribs is good, but the ribs are chewy. Ed’s brisket has the best flavor, but was sliced way too early. It lost its beauty along the way. Stoney LaRue plays us out to the Judges' Table.