Y'all -- I gots lots to discuss.
Let me start with moi's tres controversial "See you later, decorator" catchphrase. One night, as my bloke and I were playing ping pong (a nightly ritual which always devolves into us just smacking the ball at each other), we concocted some options for my signature kissoff: "Swatch off." "You're banned from the D&D building forever." "You're an Elsie de Wolfe in sheep's clothing." "You suck. Good luck." Then, I blurted out "See ya later, decorator." Memorable, silly, fun -- done! It seems that some people aren't feeling my catchphrase and the blogosphere is on fire with suggested alternatives. Oh well. At the end of the day, it's got to be something, so to everyone who thinks it's the worst thing since Foam destroyed the restaurant world -- y'all can kiss my swatch. For reals.
The word "Decorator" is quite controversial. My brethren are funny about being called decorators - they're worried about being characterized as fluffy dilettantes with bags of swatches. They prefer the term "Designer" which, in their minds, connotes professionalism and gravitas. Decorator/designer, manicurist/beauty consultant, sex-worker/prostitute, whatever. The whole euphemism thing is especially comical chez nous. My bloke, Simon Doonan, is a window dresser and I am a potter. Two more reviled professions are hard to imagine. The word potter conjures an image of a crunchy Vermonter, years out of date, sequestered in a garret listening to Joni Mitchell and never shaving anything. Window dresser is even worse. Be honest -- the window dresser in your mind's eye makes Rip Taylor look like Tom Selleck. But Simon and I don't insist on being called a "ceramicist" and a "visual display merchandiser". We embrace everything about our professions including people's tendencies to mock them. We don't care what anybody calls us and neither should you! On to the episode. How cute were the 10-year-old kids? I thought their excitement about design was very very sweet and I particularly loved the little girl who wanted more glitter. She was really on to something -- we all need a bit more glitter.
Designing kids' rooms is one of my favorite aspects of interior design. Kids' rooms can be over the top and themey. They're not about being sensible. Sometimes designing adult bedrooms can feel like having to eat all of your vegetables, while kids' rooms are like a big delicious bowl of Froot Loops. Eric embraced the challenge, liberated himself from the shackles of good taste and designed a room that his client loved. Eric's ability to decorate, to "whomp" and "zsoosh" in that short time was truly impressive. He's a very talented fella who gives decorators a good name. He truly deserved to win.
There was a real range of stuff in this episode. Goil's design was very fun and I appreciated the fact that he didn't care where his bed would go once it slid into the wall. This is tv, it's fantasy, and I'd rather be transported into Goil's alternate universe in which beds can disappear than bogged down with pedestrian problems like the sliding bed wreaking havoc in the room next door.
I kinda' feel bad about how we treated Michael. Yes, his room was funereal, but his client liked it. Michael redeemed himself nicely from the previous episode -- he actually painted this time. I think he's sweeter than he might come across. Carisa's room was very fun and Matt's Hollywood glamour rocked -- using those cheapo clip lights as sconces was very inventive.
And then there's John. You know, I don't know if it came through on TV, but his room was completely unfinished, and we had no choice but to send him packing. I totally respect him for the way he revealed his HIV status and thought he was a true gentleman. I have a lot of friends in the design community who struggle with HIV and my heart goes out to John. I think it was brave of him to do so on the show, I think he's a talented guy, and I wish him all the best.
Now, back to "See ya Later, Decorator." Once you accept the majesty of the See ya later, blank-blank-ator lifestyle, you'll find squillions of opportunities to use it. "See ya later, attitudinal waiter". For your Valentine, there's always "See Ya later, sweet potater" or it could go a bit blue with "See ya later, stimulator". If I run into my pal Lady Bunny I can always say "See ya later, female impersonator." "See ya later, Christian Slater" would work if you should happen to encounter the oft-arrested celeb. The possibilities are endless. Lately I've been using one particular iteration more and more -- for some reason I keep finding myself saying "See ya later, catchphrase hater". Next week... Art: hate it or love it? Till then, see ya later!