So much has happened over the past year. A lot of friendships have ended and mended. I personally don't think Stassi and I will ever be good friends again. When I needed her the most she wasn't there for me and that's something I've forgiven her for but will never forget. Friends grow apart and not all friendships are meant to last forever. We had a good run, but she's not someone I can be friends with anymore. She's just too selfish and it's her way or no way. That's not my style, sorry.
As if dealing with Stassi wasn't enough, I'm now in the middle of Kristen and Ariana. It's such a tough position for me to be in because I have a lot of love for both of them and we all have history together. Kristen and I were friends for 3 years before I worked at SUR, before the show, and before I even met Ariana. You didn't see much of that, but if you watch the very first episode of Vanderpump Rules you see she had my back with Stassi and was SO supportive of me at the Roxy. We WERE friends and are again. We had a falling out. She was a total bitch to me, but she's really never been a bad friend TO ME. This puts me in an extremely awkward position because Ariana is one of my absolute best friends and now she's dating Tom. Seeing Kristen constantly hate on Ariana is beyond annoying and it pisses me off -- but I can't control what Kristen does. She's an adult and she makes her own choices. I can give her my opinion, but I can't tell her what to do and what not to.
Moving on to a lighter side of the reunion I absolutely LOVE watching Tom's impressions of me. The fact that he can dance that good as me makes me wonder. . .Maybe he's in the wrong profession? I'm sure he could go up the street to The Abbey and get hired as a go-go dancer in a heartbeat. I'm like seriously, how many times did you watch my performance to get those moves down?
I can't even begin to describe how absolutely over Brandi and this situation I am. Literally, the Eddie thing was almost eight years ago!!! Why are we still talking about this? It's so annoying. I get it -- to her I will always be the other woman. Cool. I've apologized. I've moved on. I am happy and engaged. I don't want to constantly talk about this fling I had with a piece of s--- actor almost a decade ago. I didn't cheat on anyone. I don't owe Brandi anything. I've already apologized. Move on and go attack one of his other many flings. I'm sure he had and is still having. I've heard the stories. I don't even acknowledge Brandi anymore when I see her. I don't care to associate myself with her or waste my time being nice and kissing her ass by giving her fake complements. I'm over it. And yes, I said fake.
Going back to SUR. . .The whole Jax and Kristen thing was just wrong. It was just sex. No emotions, just sex. I agree with Stassi that it wouldn't have been as bad if they oddly fell in love with each other. You can't help who you fall for. You CAN help who you sleep with. If there was some emotional aspect to it, I think both Stassi and Tom may have been a little more forgiving.
We are a family. A dysfunctional one at times but a family. As Kristen calls it, a "framily." So when someone does something like this, it is like betraying not only your friends but you family. Working in any restaurant for as long as we have all worked together, you get extremely close. Some cross the lines -- but regardless we are a close group and even Lisa sees that. There wouldn't have been so many tears at the reunion if we all didn't love and care for each other at one point in time. A lot of people got hurt this past year and some are wounds that will never be healed.
OK -- I will say I enjoyed watching Tom yelling at Stassi. Someone needed to completely call her out and I'm glad it was Tom. I don't think he was out-of-line at all. Just as I don't think Stassi was out-of-line for handling the Kristen confrontation in the way she did. The only reason Tom and Kristen even showed up was because they thought it was an engagement celebration for Shay and I. I felt terrible blind-siding Tom, but we knew if we gave him a heads up there was a chance he would tell her and she wouldn't come. This needed to come out, and, yeah, maybe it shouldn't have been in a room full of people -- but Kristen kept lying over and over and we all agreed she needed to be called out.
I get why Kristen didn't try harder to make up with Stassi and I go back and forth with whether that was the right choice or not. I mean really an apology wouldn't have been enough, nothing would have been. She knew that. She knew what she did was unforgivable and there was no way she could make an excuse for it. She did feel absolutely terrible over it though unlike Jax. It came off as if he had no remorse and I truly think that was his way of blocking out what he did. He knows it was wrong but same as with Kristen he knew an apology wasn't going to be enough. I think it was easier for Jax to pretend like he didn't care, then for him to actually open up emotionally and say how bad he felt for hurting Tom. In the last several months I've hung out with Jax a lot and I do think he's trying be a better person.