I had no desire to do this photoshoot for many, many reasons, but let's just cover the basics first. My day was a continuation from the day before because I had barely gotten any sleep with the thoughts of this Jax and Kristen scandal playing over and over in my head all night. The photoshoot pics all end up on SUR t-shirts, the SUR website, and a coffee table book that I can't even got a copy of (which I've repeatedly asked for). I've modeled for 15 years and have done countless campaigns, billboards, and magazines. So unless you're calling my agent and offering a day rate, I'm going to show up whenever I damn well feel. And you better be happy that I even showed up at all, considering that the only way I'm going to see any of these pics is on SUR merchandising. It's a waste of my time since I don't need more modeling pictures. I feel like I've done enough charity work to promote SUR. This also takes me away from time I could be spending on my projects and things I need to get done.
The last time I saw the classless Stassi and Jax, they had orchestrated the ultimate ambush, when they decided it was in good taste to divulge catastrophic information to me in front of a room full of friends and co-workers. It's seems like they felt it was their duty to make sure everybody Kristen and I work with and even complete strangers know my personal information.
Whether true or not, I can't think of a more horribly inconsiderate way to handle revealing extremely personal information about someone's relationship. So now I get to be around people who, before this information came out, cut Kristen off, and who have their heads halfway up Stassi's ass. What? So I can waste my time taking pictures I don’t need? So I can get their jaded opinions of what I should do with my life and my relationship? Oh and let's not forget I get to hang around and take pictures with my good ole buddy Jax (who suddenly has been transformed into a "good guy"). And now that I have a FULL grasp of what's happened, Here's my friend who I have done SO much for and helped who I have starkly realized has monumentally f---ed me over. So as you can see, it's a little tough to be happy, smile, and look good. The very presence of some of these people makes my stomach turn. Part of me wants to just leave SUR behind, head to Mexico, and escape this whole mess.