Bad Mood

Andy Cohen reveals what ruined his day.

I woke up in a foul mood this morning that was compounded by the front page of the New York Post. I am going to kick and scream until I figure out the exact moment that Jessica Simpson changing her gross, stupid hair became front-page news. I refuse to accept it. It is not a coincidence that she's on the cover with her stupid brown hair on the same night ABC is airing their bird flu movie. Something foul is in the air.

Did anyone watch David Blaine NOT set the world record for holding his breath last night? I saw bits and pieces and it was so weird and gross and apocalyptic in it's own right that it was worth a glance.

Liza Persky and I spoke several times during the show and she was transfixed. As we spoke, she realized she'd seen his last two "illusions" or whatever live. "I saw him frozen in ice in Times Square but that was only for like 36 hours or something. Then I saw him buried alive near those Trump Buildings on the far West Side. But was he sneaking out of those at night? There was something fishy about that trick.

And then I walked over to Lincoln Center and saw him in the ball," she confessed. "I really never meant to -- they were all near my apartment!" That Liza is a classic.   She and I couldn't get over the commentary, that it was produced like a news event. Was the Berlin Wall coming down or was some guy in a ball in Lincoln Center?

The promos for "Good Morning America" with that constipated ABC News announcer were soundtracked by a "heartbeat" and heralded Blaine making his first stop at GMA in the morning. Right, because it's in his contract with ABC, did they mention that? I couldn't watch the whole setting-the-record breath-hold part.

Here's what I don't like to see on TV: Tarantulas, Lucy when she's about to get caught, anything in an ER, or somebody holding his breath. So Liza called to say that he didn't set the record. The whole thing was a bust. I still don't get if he did set the record for being in that ball for a week or if that related to the holding the breath or what. Sometimes it is nice to NOT know all the details of something like this and to NOT watch GMA to find out. I am happy that he set the record for being a complete raisin-like ass. That's nice.

OK, I am going back to my crappy mood to enjoy the day. Thanks for letting me share.

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