Cast Blog: #WWHL

Default image

Bat Mitzvah

‘Tis the End of the Eighth Season

Ask, Believe, Receive A Kiss From Andy

Wish Upon a Giggy

Giving Thanks to WWHL

Weathering the Storm

Blue Cheese and Blunders

Pranks for the Memories

The Devil's Contraption

Jill Zarin Gets Fiesty on 'WWHL'

A Researcher's Dream!

To 300 More!

Watch What Happens Fire!

We're Back and Full of Surprises!

'Gossip Girl' Star Makes a Cameo on 'Watch What Happens Live'

The Weirder the Pair, The Better!

The Queen of Puns

Here Since the Beginning

The Housewife Wannabe

Bedazzled Legs, Anyone?

...And Nordstrom!

Why We Like Mike

When a Ginger Man Loves a Woman

The Locomotion!

The Body Roll

Take This Lollipop

Normal Office Conversation

From the Sky

Things I Need to Tell You

Happy Summer!

Andy's Career Advice

My Book!

How Did This Happen?

A Bravolebrity Bonanza

Viewer Mail: Andy Pleads the Fifth on Martha Stewart

Back from Vacation!

Pancakes!

Wednesday Morning

R.I.P.

Getting Myself in Gear

Viewer Mail: Andy's Most Difficult Guest

Bat Mitzvah

Andy Cohen wrestles barnacles and dead batteries in New Jersey.

By the end of last week, I'd spun myself into a white-hot state of exhaustion and hell. I was very "Calgon, take me away."

My salvation to running around like a freaking idiot didn't come from a massage or cocktail, but in the form of Molly Alter's Bat Mitzvah in Montclair, New Jersey. What better way to take a pause and collect than by watching a 13-year-old go deep and break it all down on a Saturday morning?

Like any Manhattanite faced with a trip off-island and the myriad of issues that poses, Mapquest and I grossly underestimated my travel time to New Jersey and I arrived v. early. I took great joy in snagging a great parking spot even though no one else was keeping score and there weren't any bad spots.

I've been friends with the Alters since I moved to NYC in 1990. Emily and I worked together at CBS News and now she's a producer at "The Colbert Report." Jonathan Alter sits at the top of the Newsweek masthead. He's also an author and pundit on every show with smart people, which begs the question why he's not been on a Bravo show of late. (Memo to self: book Alter on "Watch What Happens" to take viewer calls re: "Shear Genius" and Tabatha.)

Jon and Emily have 3 amazing chillins, Charlotte, Tommy, and the Bat Mitzvah girl Molly. The BM was at their house. That's what I call one stop shopping! Not only would there be no awkward transition from a Temple to a lunch to an I don't know what, but I wouldn't lose my golden parking spot.

Jews have been fleeing something forever, we were told, and they can create places to worship wherever and whenever they need. So the Montclair Jews (Jon and Emily) set up shop under a tent in the Alter's backyard. It seemed to this Jew like a reasonable place to throw on a yarmulke and go deep with a Haftorah.

Harry Smith and I surveyed the crowd pre-service. He's now CBS' elder statesman and, if you ask me, the man who should replace Katie Couric if they actually pull the trigger. (See today's New York Times biz section.) Looking around the group wistfully, Harry told me he wished he owned a piece of the blue blazer industry. I and everyone else had one on. Steven Colbert was there. (I think he had on a blue blazer too.)

At the beginning of the service the Lady Rabbi asked if anyone had never been to a BM and he raised his hand. It was funny. I believe this was unscripted. I love to sit back and listen to a Bat Mitzvah speech and Molly didn't disappoint. She intoned about her Torah portion and what Judaism means to her. She said Jews don't have to agree w/ everything God says and that everything is up for debate. I had never heard of the tradition of throwing candy at the Bat Mitzvee, but I went there.


Moments after the service was over I ran into a lady who Amy Sedaris would describe as a "Barnacle." Every party has a Barnacle. In her bestselling book about entertaining, Amy dubs Barnacle's "that one person in your life you can never get rid of.... for every barnacle there is a shipwreck they can attach themselves to." I vowed then and there not to be her shipwreck.

The barnacle corners me. "How are you getting back to The City?" She wants to know. The service JUST ENDED, rude lady! "I am driving," I tell the barnacle, terrified she's going to ask for a ride. "No but HOW are you getting BACK??" She wants to know. "What direction? What road." "I am going to reverse the directions. I am going to go the exact opposite of the way I came." I calmly tell the barnacle. "But I am not leaving for HOURS." I tell her this so she doesn't think she's going to get a ride home. I wanted to say: "I mean, it could be sundown before I leave this party! Or sun-up!" "Where did you GET your directions?" Barney wants to know.... "Mapquest," I tersely reply. "I would NEVER Mapquest!" She tells me. I actually REALLY DON'T CARE! And I let her know. "OK," I say as I walk away.

The day was fantastic. I never saw the barnacle again. I reconnected with lots of CBS pals and Alterphiles. I made Sony chief Michael Lynton talk to me about "The Young and Restless," a white-hot Sony property. (As hot as Spidey!)

I gracefully exited in the early afternoon to head to the set of "Tim Gunn's Guide to Style". (The barnacle was long gone.) I got in my car smiling only to discover that in my zeal about my platinum parking spot, I hadn't realized that the car's lights were blaring. My battery was dead. Panic. I'm stuck. In Jersey. Barnacle is probably at Scoop by now and I am suddenly drenched with sweat, totally helpless, calling roadside service for car jumping.

Why did I suddenly feel like a Jewish Homo with no Motor Skills leaving a Bat Mitzvah? Oh wait... But at least I'm not a barnacle. They said it'd be 90 minutes. As ungracefully as I'd exited 10 minutes earlier, I busted back into the party. I found Reid Collins, Jr. and asked him to help me. He asked if I had cables and I felt dumb telling him I didn't. His were in his other car. We were about to drive to a gas station when it occurred to me that perhaps I should LOOK to see if I had cables before assuming I didn't.

I opened my trunk and there they sat. Pristinely wrapped and shiny new. We jumped that car and I made it safely back into the city.

Want to reach Andy? E-mail him
Who's Andy? Read his bio

 

Ask, Believe, Receive A Kiss From Andy

WWHL’s Research PA dishes on one seriously unique work week.

Hey guys! My name is Laura and I’m a Research Production Assistant here at WWHL. For the first 3 seasons on this unbeweavable show, I was the permanently glittered hands crafting the crazy fun props and prizes gifted to the guests. You name it, I’ve bedazzled it! (No but seriously: pacifier, pickle, ‘fro pick, condoms, whip, hookah, mannequin leg...the list goes on!) This past season, I closed down my crafting corner and now I have the pleasure of helping Megan, Christie, and Lindsey with research and interactive. Every night, I get to read all of your amazing questions for our guests and help make sure that Andy’s got a stellar selection on his cards. But who cares about me?! On to this crazy week of shows!

Sunday: Kim and Reza did NOT disappoint.  They served up some wig wearin’, stache sportin’, truth tellin’ realness.  Kim rocked “The Farrah” like only she can, not to be outdone by Reza’s gloriously quaffed upper lip.  I swear that man’s mustache is the 8th wonder of the world...

There’s something so refreshing about two guests truly unafraid to tell it like it is and it makes for great TV.  Reza musta had Santa on the brain ‘cause he couldn’t keep from dropping those Ho, Ho, Hos! And say what you will about Kim, but that lady just wants to be home with her hot hubby and you can’t hate a ho for that!  

Monday: Let’s be real for a second: I’m 23 and I’m not even gonna PRETEND to be ashamed that I used to drink up every drama filled minute of Laguna Beach and The Hills. So of course I was LIVING for Kristin Cavallari’s confession that it was a big pile of producer induced drama. Shocking? Eh, not really. Exhilarating for the teen in me? Abso-freaking-lutely. There’s no shame in my game, hunny!




Taylor Armstrong was on her absolute A-game and she totally wins for my favorite one liner of the week: “The only thing uglier than a drunk woman is a drunk woman’s 40-yr-old ass flying through the air!” And please let us not forget the arm wrestling. Oh my word, the arm wrestling.  

Epic.  

Tuesday: Truly, there are no words for the amazingness that was the luscious lipped Lisa Rinna and Jeff Lewis and therefore I simply gift you with this kisstacular clip:




You’re welcome. 

Wednesday: I really think that one of the things that is so unique about WWHL is our unexpected guest combos. You never know who will end up in those chairs!  So when I saw ‘Carmen Electra and Billy Ray Cyrus’ on the calendar, my achy breaky heart skipped an achy breaky beat.

When Carmen slinked into the studio I couldn’t believe how amazing she looked. Does that woman age?! She was KILLIN’ it all night long complete with sex appeal and sock bun. I admit I was bummed when Billy Ray plead the fifth on the Miley Ex-BF question. I mean really, who wasn’t hoping for a little juice on a JoBro?! But fear not! Carmen saved the day (and all the imaginary swimmers) by teaching Andy and Billy to patrol the beach, slow mo style!

WWHL_Dec6_Laura_Baywatch.jpg

Thursday: Apparently agelessness is going around because Jane Fonda looks SPECTACULAR. She and Sandra paired up for the perfect storm of hilarity and the show ended with my favorite new holiday tradition: Secret Sandra! 

And may I just add that the legendary, Oscar winning, fitness flaunting Miss Fonda went home wearing a menorah hat? So yeah, my life is complete. 


WWHL_Dec6_Laura_Jane.jpg

Love and Light ;)
Laura