Pack Your Whisk And Go

Andy Cohen on Gordon Ramsey, Ted Haggard, and Top Chef.

There's nothing like waking up in Los Angeles on a clear, sunny "winter" morning, sipping some tea in your hotel terry and seeing what the LA TIMES is serving up. Oh look, a great profile of Liam Neeson. And here's a great review of that Ted Haggard documentary I can't wait to see! Oh and here's a story about "Hell's Kitchen" grump Gordon Ramsay, who accuses "Top Chef" of...

Wait a minute.. What!?

"Now if only 'Top Chef' would stop stealing our ideas." That's the button on the article.

I'm racking my brain wondering what specifically Ramsay thinks we're ripping off from his show. I haven't seen it, but I know he screams a lot and the chefs aren't too great. Hmmm.

Oh WAIT, I've got it, and I hate to say he's kinda right. Last week Padma did try to plunger that poor Quickfire loser with a whisk.. and I guess we stole THAT. But that was TEENY. A Moment. And he DESERVED IT. And, I mean, we heard it worked so well on the other show...

And I know that that time Tom emulsified Spike's tongue was considered mean, and people thought we were dipping into the "Hell's Kitchen" bag o' tricks, but it was A HOMAGE! And he TOTALLY DESERVED IT FOR SCREWING UP THE coq au van!

OK. Fair enough. I guess I see what he's talking about. We'll try to stop ripping you off, Ramsay. Thanks for the warning, and if this is about fishing for an invite to be a guest judge, we'd love it! All you have to do is ASK, no need for smoke signals in the paper.

Speaking of "Top Chef", what'd you think of the episode last night? I know the ending was a bit of a shocker, but so was the whole show. The Top Chef Bowl was a fun idea and I could not BELIEVE that Andrea beat Stefan. Wow. THAT was a moment. (And there was no yelling involved, Gordo.)

So now I'm in Los Angeles and I hate to be a broken record, and I know I've said this before, but Here's what: people don't know how to COVER THEIR MOUTHS. I spent six hours crossing the country yesterday being serenaded by my seatmate's sneezejuice. Blech. There's not enough Goldenseal to protect me from the germs of my countrymen.

By the time I got to my hotel everyone was talking about Ted Haggard on Oprah.  I watched clips of the show on HuffPo, stat. What a sad man. I guess his therapist calls him a "heterosexual with homosexual attachments". Here's a little newsflash, I think that means gay but your therapist made up another word for it. (Oprah said she didn't know what that meant, too.)

Then the wife comes on and talks about what an amazing sex life they have.

Oh hey, ya wanna know what I think of Teddy Haggard? I think he is creepy. And he gives a bad name to people like me who are heterosexual with homosexual attachments.

I'm going to watch that tape of Padma with her whisk.

 

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