I did think it was cool of Erika to leave with me. She didn't really know WHAT was going on with Jackie and I, but she was concerned about me. She thought my feelings might have been hurt. I adore Erika...she really has my back! For the record, my feelings were NOT hurt. I actually had plans with friends that night and had to leave regardless. The scenes with Doug were hard for me to watch this week especially when he was talking about how this would be his last birthday. It's as if he knew on some level he didn't have much longer. That kills me. Nobody knew he was sick at his party. He was so strong and put on such a brave face. I had no idea and it was jokes and laughter, as usual, with us.
I have known Doug for years since we both taught spin classes at the same place in LA. We had a very playful relationship. I always loved to shock him with my antics. I think he appreciated my openness around the more taboo subjects. He is more understated and shy and never has a bad word to say about anyone. Doug was a one of a kind, and watching him each week, along with the rest of you, makes me feel grateful that I got to know him and have him in my life. I think the show does a great job in capturing his beautiful spirit which I know...lives on.