Once upon a time, there was a magical workshop off in the farthest reaches of the North Pole where little elves toiled night and day making gifts for all the girls and boys. Presiding over this operation was one bearded old chap who went by the name Saint Nick — Santa for short. He was a kind and jolly fellow with a sweet tooth for gingerbread cookies who could always be counted on for a hearty laugh.
But increasingly, Santa was troubled. He noticed the elves seemed a little stressed out. Deadlines were being missed and toys were not being assembled properly. Then he got wind of whispers in the ranks. A feeling was taking hold that Christmas had just gotten too big. Sure, it was manageable when it encompassed little more than a small European winter solstice festival, but now Christmas was everywhere. Santa realized the elves were right, the pace of Christmas had grown too intense. Without some help, he worried the whole thing might come to a disastrous end, disappointing millions of children.
That’s when one special elf by the name of Jeff Bezos came to him with an idea: outsourcing. “Tell me more,” Santa said. So Jeff Bezos did, and once he got the nod from the man with the beard, he went about decorating the world with warehouses — warehouses stocked with every creation known to man! All Santa — or anyone who wanted anything — had to do was click a button, and before long a box with a smiley face would appear outside the door containing just that item. It was magic! Jeff Bezos had a name for it. He called it... Cadabra! But nobody liked that name, so he changed it to Amazon, and all was good. Santa and the elves were able to keep up with Christmas demand, boys and girls all over the world were able to have their wishes come true, and grown-ups everywhere were able celebrate the joys of the season while avoiding most of the stressors. The End.
Here are the best holiday gift ideas on Amazon.
Imagine everything you love about Echo Dot and add video — that's what you get with Echo Spot. Now you can see weather forecasts, song lyrics, to-do lists, and video chat with family and friends, all hands free.
Fire TV Stick with Alexa Voice Remote
If you’re not using Alexa to navigate to your favorite TV shows, we hate to break it to you: You’re doing it wrong. This is one little gift anyone would love.
Kindle Paperwhite E-Reader
An ideal gift for the bookworm in your life, the Kindle Paperwhite gives you access to millions of titles at super low prices. The adjustable light allows you to read day and night without glare and now it's waterproof, too.
Ancestry DNA Kit
A great gift for history buffs and that one uncle who’s sure he’s a descendant of George Washington — this kit lets you unlock the secrets of ancestry. It provides a breakdown of ethnicity and helps people discover shared DNA family members across the globe and throughout history.
Oculus Rift + Touch VR System
Have a geek in your life? Prepare to lose them forever to the Oculus Rift and its incredible immersive VR experience. It comes with six free titles and Oculus Touch controllers.
Smeg 1.7-Liter Kettle-Pastel Green
This cute-as-a-button Smeg kettle looks good on any countertop — and keeps water piping hot for up to 20 minutes. It's a tea-drinker’s esssential.
Fujifilm Instax Mini 9 Instant Camera
No matter how advanced smartphone cameras get, nothing compares to the joys of an instamatic, and this Fuji insta is just an all around fun gift. (Yes, a selfie mirror is included.)
iRobot Roomba 675 Robot Vacuum
This robot vacuum actually keeps floors clean while entertaining pets and maybe even giving the cat a little joyride.
A handsome and addictive accessory for any fitness buff, the Fitbit Alta tracks activity levels and calories burned and syncs with just about every device.
Razor Blue Skateboard
This skateboard-snowboard hybrid gives kids the thrill of surfing and snowboarding on dry land. Best of all, no batteries are required.
VicTsing Humidifier Ultrasonic Aroma Diffuser
A dream gift for the wellness fanatic, yoga enthusiast, dry climate dweller, or anyone who cares about indoor air quality, this humidifier by VicTsing infuses and purifies the air as it humidifies. Be sure to include essential oils for the full aromatic experience.
Philips Wake-up Light with Sunrise Simulation
Give the gift of sunshine and stave off Seasonal Affective Disorder during dark winter months with this stimulating alarm clock light. It gradually increases in brightness over a 30-minute period before wakeup time.
Epson Home Cinema Projector
One the whole family will enjoy, this projector system brings widescreen, hi-def viewing to the living room — at a really nice price. Plus, it connects to cable or satellite, disc players, gaming consoles or streaming devices.
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