What would be the best present a single mama could give herself this Mother’s Day? How about a new love?
Navigating the dating game can be hard, especially when you have little ones to care for. But if you’re serious about finding it, “you should be like NIKE and ‘Just Do It,’” says celebrity matchmaker and dating strategist Jasmine Diaz, founder of Superhero School: Online School for Daters. “You’ll never find the right day, time or opportunity to start dating again, so if you’re waiting for something magical to spark or a window to open, I’m afraid it will never happen.”
Jasmine shares that it’s not only important to get back in the dating pool pronto, but to make sure your dating skills are up-to-date.
“Even two years of being out of the dating game can put you at a significant disadvantage,” she explains. That means maintaining your dating profiles, try new dating apps and actually engaging with users who show interest.
Need a few tips on how to getting started (again!)? Jasmine has three:
1. Prioritize dating
“As a parent, it’s hard to prioritize anything other than your child. Getting an hour to yourself is usually very difficult to come by, but if you’re serious about being in a relationship, you must commit.” Jasmine suggests breaking up your search into hours instead of days. “If it’s just one hour a week, take that hour and maximize your efforts.” Engage in dating apps or websites for the hour, or use that hour to engage in a social networking event after work. “Whatever time you have to dedicate to dating, make finding love your new priority.”
2. Date with intention
“When you’re a single parent trying to make the best of your time, it’s important that you don’t waste it with people who don’t line up with what you need or want,” declares Jasmine, who advises not to confuse the two. “What you need is what you require to be happy in a relationship” – not superficial things like height and body type, which fall into the want category. When you take too much time focusing on people who meet your wants while ignoring your needs, it can lead you to the wrong people, Jasmine explains. “If you intend to get married, don’t waste your time with a guy who doesn’t.”
3. Hire help
Maybe you bring in people to help take care of your children – why not hire help for your dating life! “Moms never wear less than 10 hats … but the reality of being a parent is realizing that you don’t have all the answers.” Jasmine says that matchmakers, dating coaches and other dating services can be instrumental to your love life.
Don’t have time to invest in answering all your online inquiries? Consider hiring someone to manage your virtual dating life. You delegate chores to your kids – now delegate your love life!
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