After literally months of anticipation, over 1.2 million people livestreamed April the giraffe giving birth on April 15th. The calf—a boy—arrived happily and healthily, weighing in at 129 pounds and measuring 5’9” tall. And now comes the fun part: THE NAMING.
Proving that zoos and other animal organizations will never learn, Animal Adventure Park in Harpursville, New York—where April the giraffe and her brand-new son live—is asking the internet to help name the newborn calf. All you have to do is donate $5 and come up with a bunch of suggestions. (Votes are $1 each, with a minimum of 5 votes.) The funds will be split between giraffe conservation efforts in the wild and Ava’s Little Heroes, a campaign that supports local families with unexpected medical expenses.
“We want your help choosing the name of April’s new baby calf,” reads the Animal Adventure Park website. “For about 10 days you can vote on any name or names you choose for April's new calf. You even get to decide your own spelling. Come back and vote as many times as you'd like. After the end of the first part of the contest we will reveal the top ten names. Then you can come back and vote on any of those 10 names.”
While we appreciate the fundraising campaign, we all know that this isn’t going to go well. You may recall various other times organizations have asked the internet for its help—such as the time the Berlin Zoo asked for assistance naming its baby polar bear. The most popular suggestion was Poley McPoleface, forcing the zoo to pivot and put a committee in charge of the naming. (They ultimately landed on Fritz.)
So get out there and submit and vote. We look forward to choosing between Spotty McLongNeck, Necky O’Leafeater, and Giraffey de Giraffe Face.
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