While Kim Kardashian and Kanye West (sorry, that's “Ye” to us now) admit they fight like any normal couple, it’s hard to imagine how that would actually go. But Kim’s letting us in on their latest battle, in which Kanye wants to control what she posts on social media — and she’s not having any of it.
Here’s a little bit of the conversation she admitted the two had during a massive blowout about Band-Aids and Kim’s social media, which Kanye was trying to edit to his liking after a sexy photo shoot. It was all revealed on Sunday night's Keeping Up With The Kardashians, of course.
“I’m like it’s my Instagram, you’re not going to tell me what to post, that’s like the one thing, no one will tell me what to post,” she said, adding, “He wanted me to post six polaroids from that shoot…but I posted one from the beach,” she explained to Khloe. “He wanted them to all match up and be from the motel, that’s what the f*****g fight was…I’m like, ‘I like the beach one's and he’s like “no! You don’t understand, I see the vision.’”
The fight then turned to Band-Aids with Kim admitting, “We had a fight because I wouldn’t get him a Band-Aid.”
“There was a Band-Aid, and I put it on him, he didn’t like the color of the Band-Aid, so we went upstairs in the kids’ room and I go ‘oh look North has Jesus Band-Aids, put on one of those,’” she continued. “And he was like ‘I slaved around the world making clothes for you…and you let me go out wearing a Jesus Band-Aid,’ he said I should have got a skin-colored Band-Aid.”
Then she adds something interesting. Kanye has started acting out since the couple’s family grew to having three children, because he feel neglected.
“I think so many husbands feel neglected when you have kids and all their attention gets taken away,” Kim added.
Relationship expert April Masini tells Personal Space this is a common problem once a couple had children. She offers some advice:
Accept that you have to change your relationship structure when you have kids.
“What that means in plain English is that you have to change your priorities and create a new way to spend your time and energy, given your new responsibilities (your children). If you shift all of your energy towards your children, there may be fallout from a partner who feels left out. Not every partner will feel that way — some will be on board for making the kids number one (two and three), but most will feel left out. If you’re someone who has a partner who feels neglected, accept that things have to change and you have to start doing things differently.”
Create a system that gives your relationship energy and space to flourish, now that you have kids.
“If you just go with the flow, you’re probably going to run into problems. Instead of letting things play out, try to proactively create a system that hedges against relationship problems. This can be as simple as instituting a weekly date night, a monthly hotel weekend, stocking your lingerie drawer, trying to keep yourself attractive for a partner instead of just comfortable for kid-corralling, etc.”
Communicate and listen to your partner.
“Make sure they are doing the same. It’s great to accept change and rise up to meet it, but understand that you may have misjudged your partner’s feelings, or didn’t disclose your own feelings. Your partner may want something you haven’t discussed or didn’t know, or your partner may want your mother to stop coming over unannounced, or maybe your mother to come over more often to help out. And you may be clueless about this — so make sure you talk, listen, watch and show ... to stay flexible and open.”
It's possible to avoid a child-centered marriage, says Fran Greene, author of Dating Again With Courage and Confidence.
"Nurturing a close, loving relationship between you and your partner is the best gift you can give your children," Fran says. "You are setting the example of what a healthy relationship is and how you can be a loving parent and an adoring partner simultaneously. If you put your kids first all the time you are modeling for them that their needs always come first and they can come between you and your partner to get their needs met."
She says to make sure you spend time alone with your partner. "Adult time without the kids allows you to focus on each other in a way that’s not possible when you are changing diapers, making lunches, cleaning and cooking all at the same time."
Fran adds that sending loving texts, and saying "I love you," goes a long way. "Demonstrating that you care will keep the love alive," she says.
Dates, and a night spent alone in your own house with your partner without any interruptions, also help.
And remember, the kids leave someday. "Never forget that you and your partner will be together long after the kids leave the house. Never take each other for granted and treat each day as the most important day of your relationship."
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