Who says there is a rule book when it comes to relationships, especially when it comes to the living situation between those involved in it? It might seem obvious that first comes love, then comes marriage, and then comes co-living together inside of a home, but not anymore.
The Real Housewives of New Jersey's Jackie Goldschneider dished on the After Show about how her parents love each other but they just don't enjoy living together, "It's f---ked up but it works for them."
Jackie explains, "When my sister had a baby ... her first baby 18 years ago, my mom was like 'be right back just gonna go help her out for a little bit.' She packed a bag and she never came home."
Take celebrities, like Gwyneth Paltrow and Brad Falchuk, who recently got married but have yet to move in together. In their case, it's because they both are parents with Paltrow even admitting she’s never been a stepmother before and truly doesn’t know where to start. “We are still doing it in our own way,” Paltrow explained. "With teenage kids, you’ve got to tread lightly... It’s pretty intense, the teenage thing.”
Other famous couples move apart when considering a split or for convenience, and, while some find they're happier to continue living near their partners (like Chrissy Teigen's parents), others end up moving back in together after all (like Married to Medicine's Dr. Simone and Cecil Whitmore).
It begs the question: how can two people be happily married and live miles, states, or even countries apart? Read on to find out the reasons why some couples are keeping their distance, all in the name of love.
They Have Big Living Differences
It’s true that you can be madly in love with someone and marry them, but still have things about them that you just can’t stand.
Dr. Margaret Paul, a bestselling author, relationship expert, and co-creator of the powerful InnerBonding® self-healing process, says that some couples, though they love each other, have conflict over specific issues and find it easier living apart.
“Issues like one person is messy and the other is neat, one is healthy and the other one eats junk food, or they have different religions or politics, it can be easier to just live apart,” says Dr. Paul.
The Bigger the Family ... the More Separate the Houses?
When both people come to the marriage with kids of their own, often times those blended families might opt to live separately.
“Both partners have children who don’t get along with each other or both partners have children who need to stay in their same schools might be a reason for living separate,” says Dr. Paul. “Also, if they have different parenting styles that may be another reason too.”
The Trust Is Already There
If the relationship is going well and both couples need a little space to help it make it for many years to come, having two homes, away from each other, might not be a bad idea.
“Sometime the heart grows fonder when you don't live together day in and day out,” says Vikki Ziegler, a divorce attorney.“ This is a special type of couple that needs to be 100 percent trusting of each other and be able to live apart but still give each other the attention they need to thrive in a long-term healthy marriage.”
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