Your Partner Cheated, Now Your Family Hates Them ... What Can You Do?

Your Partner Cheated, Now Your Family Hates Them ... What Can You Do?

Khloe Kardashian is currently in Los Angeles with Tristan Thompson. Uh oh.

By Marianne Garvey

Khloe Kardashian will reportedly address her boyfriend Tristan Thompson’s cheating scandal  on the upcoming season of Keeping Up With the Kardashians — and we can’t wait to see it.

“They always discuss real life things on the show. They’ve never ignored a topic,” a source tells US Weekly. “It will definitely be brought up, but they don’t know how much. They can film hours about it, but in the end, Khloe is one of the executive producers and will have final say on what actually makes air…He doesn’t understand why it has to be addressed, but Khloe has said if it’s not dealt with on the show, questions will continue to linger. No one has heard from Khloe directly about what she felt or what she has gone through, and she pointed out to Tristan that she won’t do anything to hurt him by briefly discussing the cheating. She has moved on from it.”

Maybe she has, but what about her family? They’re famous for sticking by each other through drama and scandal, and are so fiercely devoted to one another they all eventually stopped talking to Caitlyn Jenner after she bashed their mom in her book.

On this past season of Vanderpump Rules, Jax Taylor was forced to apologize to Brittany Cartwright’s mom after he cheated on her. Brittany’s mom forgave him, and the two eventually got engaged, but it was still awkward to watch.

What happens when you’ve been cheated on, but stay together? You may be over it, but your family now has a problem with your significant other.

Relationship expert and author of Cheat On Your Husband (With Your Husband), Andrea Syrtash tells Personal Space that if you are really close with your family, they may not warm up so fast to the idea of your partner still being in your life.

"It depends how much your family was involved in the drama,” she says. “If you relied on them for support, don't expect them to warm up to the idea of you being together right away. Best to prepare them first by sharing why you're back together and why it's important to you to try to be respectful. Let them ask you questions or share their feelings…The person who cheated should be prepared that he/she may get an icier reception. The hope is with time, communication, respect, everyone can get back on track.”

If there is a kid or kids involved, “all parties have to hold the drama and discussion about the cheating until the child(ren) are asleep or not present.”

“It's essential to regulate your feelings around a kid, who is generally sensitive to adults who are fighting,” Syrtash says.

Everyone has to learn to trust again—that includes family members.

"When it comes to cheating, expect that it may take everyone a while to re-adjust and trust again. Don't expect everyone to be on the same page, just because you feel okay now. It'll take work to repair trust - and that's okay.”

April Masini, a relationship advice expert, says to create a peace treaty, setting a family-wide agreement that the family won’t bring up the cheating, in order to give everyone a chance to heal.

“If Khloe and Tristan are worried that this issue may be brought up by a family member every time they get together, it’s gong to be like walking a relationship minefield for them,” Masini says. “This is especially important if there is a child involved. The child needs to have positive experiences with the family — both nuclear and extended — and having the “peace treaty” — even if it’s conditioned on a time period or on there being private talks about the cheating. Children (even babies) pick up negative energy. They’re super tuned in to moods and emotions, if not words. So creating some peaceful and pleasant experiences for the child’s sake is important and this peace treaty notion is a great tool to do that.”

Family shouldn’t stay mad either, as everything in a relationship isn’t black and white.

“It’s super easy to point fingers and create villains,” Masini says. “Someone who cheats on a partner may be a fabulous parent or a fabulous business person. The reality is that Tristan was not big on being faithful from the get go, and Khloe, who is an intelligent woman, made decisions based on romance, not practicality — and this isn’t her first time at the rodeo.”

Therapist Jason Eric Ross says family should consider taking the high road.

“Allow yourself to have your feelings and decide an effective way to deal with them,” he says. “The person who should be most upset is you…And you decide how this goes if you are mindful; because you will likely be calmer. If you want to be angry you can. Everyone in your family will likely pile on, too. Let us know how that works out…However, if this is done properly, everyone should either follow your lead, and someone needs to shows emotional intelligence. Hopefully you are the one. Just being angry isn't responding. It's reacting.”

Ultimately, family should respect your decision if you’ve decided to stay with your partner.

That is a personal choice people should respect,” Ross says.

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