The Giant Red Finger from tonight’s finale said it best: Rosie is Number 1.
The problem is that she spends so much time worrying about other people’s needs that she sometimes forgets to look out for Number 1. This became increasingly evident as we got closer to the delivery date. As Rosie poured her heart and soul into helping other women, she seemed to be neglecting her own needs.
As it relates to newborn preparation, Rosie and I have developed a system over the years. She buys the nursery furniture, and I assemble the nursery furniture. She buys the baby clothes, and I tell her that she purchased the cutest baby clothes. It’s all rather simple. So where was the nursery furniture? Where were all the pink baby clothes? I’ve never been strong in psychology. So I’d be lying if I told you that I was clear on the exact issue. However, I knew enough to know that something was wrong. And like any of her clients, Rosie needed help.
As you likely gathered, it’s never easy to perform an “intervention” on the interventionist. I knew that the weather forecast would call for resistance…lots of resistance. However, the difficult (and somewhat awkward) process was absolutely worth it. Rosie was forced to confront issues that had plagued her for years. I knew the “intervention” would be a learning experience for both of us. However, I’m not sure I was prepared for exactly what came out. Rosie -- the Number 1 Super-Mom --was terrified of having a girl. Total shock: One moment we were sitting on an NYC rooftop, completely ecstatic, celebrating the upcoming birth of our first daughter. The next moment we were sitting in JR’s room discussing Rosie’s deep trepidation about having a girl. I was completely shocked. It was really hard, because I didn’t want her to feel anything other than the joy that I’ve seen her experience leading up to having a baby. Further complicating matters was that I was so excited to have our first girl, beyond words.
As a perennial optimist, I typically search for anything positive, magnify it when necessary and try to develop a positive outcome. This was different. I couldn’t will Rosie to forget about her past struggles with her mother. I couldn’t will her to believe that her struggles with her mother were completely independent of the birth of our daughter. But I could be there for her in every way possible -- to listen to her, to comfort her and to gently push her towards speaking with a professional. Once she agreed to speak with her therapist, I knew the healing process was about to begin.
Rosie is always Number 1.