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After the chaos of the early morning in which the Parsifal III ran aground while Tom was on anchor watch, the deckhand hoped to put all of that behind him and enjoy some time off with the crew, including Ashley Marti, whom he hooked up with earlier this season. But when Ashley started turning her attention toward Gary King, whom she had also previously expressed an interest in, Tom became incredibly upset — and he let Ashley know it.
"OK, so we've got a massive s--t sandwich going on, and then just to top it off, when you don't think anything can get quite worse," Tom recalled of that night in an exclusive interview with Bravo Insider last month prior to the episode airing. "Fifty percent my fault for going and getting drunk. I should have gone to bed that night. I should not have been drinking, you know? I was really upset. Like, really upset. And then I just got drunk."
And so, Tom said that he actually doesn't have the best memory of the events of the crew's time off. "I don't even remember that night. I don't remember doing anything. I'll have to watch it the same as everyone else to see what happened 'cause I've heard about bits of what happened, but definitely don't know what happened to the full extent," he said. "I just know that, like, after everything that had happened with me and her, and then everything that happened back home and then with the boat running aground and then she wants to just go and mug me off again, it just tipped me over the boiling point."
After being filled in on his drama with Ashley, Tom told Bravo Insider that he believes they both bear some responsibility for what transpired that night. "I'm sure whatever I said, no one should say those things. And I definitely have apologized for that. But at the same time, she should have been more sensitive to my situation. Like, she knew what was going on. And she just went and, you know, she put the final nail in the coffin, I think. It was just a very un-sensitive thing to do. I wouldn't treat someone like that if someone was going through a rough time and they just messed up and whatever," Tom said. "I didn't think it was very nice."
Tom said that he does regret what he said to Ashley. "I wish I never said those things. Though, I actually should have just gone to bed. I shouldn't have even been out drinking," he shared. "So, you know, [I'm] obviously gonna be horrified by what I say to her."
The morning after their argument, Ashley expressed to Tom how disappointed she was in his behavior the night before. "I don't know what was going through your mind when you did that, but I have never in my life been disrespected like that before," she told the deckhand. "Whether you agree with me or not, I did absolutely nothing to deserve that."
When Tom told Ashley, "It's not me. I didn't mean any of that," she called "bulls--t" on his explanation.
Still, Tom continued to express his remorse to Ashley over the incident. "I apologize. You don't have to accept it right now. I'm not asking for you to do that. I'm absolutely mortified. Like, that is not f--king OK. That is not me. And I'm not gonna blame it on the booze. You can do whatever you like," he said. "I was just a drunk, jealous loser. I'm just really, really sorry."
The conversation between Ashley and Tom ended calmly but with things visibly cool between them. No matter what the result was going to be, Tom told Bravo Insider that it was important for him to apologize to the stew. "I'm always the first person to apologize, you know, when you really know it's you and you've messed up. Like, I will be the first person to say I'm sorry," he said. "I definitely don't want to speak to women like that or speak to anyone like that. The first thing that I knew I had to do, I think, was, you know, to just say sorry for some of the nasty things I said."
However, Tom said that he thinks he deserves an apology from Ashley as well. "I do remember this, I was waiting for an apology from her, like, 'cause she did owe me one. She owed me something. Like, she sparked that. She did that. And she didn't even apologize," he said. "She just thought she'd done nothing, which just shocks me, still. Still to this day, I've never had an apology from her — but I'm good friends with her."
You read that right. After all of that, Tom and Ashley were able to get back on good terms. "Me and Ashley get along really well now," Tom said. "We're really good friends. We talk every day."
Tom said that he was happy to leave any tension with Ashley on the boat. "I don't think afterwards the drama needs to continue. You know, we can all forgive, forget, and be in the experience together," he said. "People are way meaner to each other. Like, there's married couples out there that are horrible to each other, but they're still together. So why should me and Ashley not be friends, you know? Now looking back, I've got nothing against her."
In fact, when Tom said goodbye to Ashley as he departed the Parsifal III crew in the April 4 episode of Below Deck Sailing Yacht, she told him, "We're good." Ashley even added, "I am gonna miss you."
The two now seem to have a good sense of humor about their brief boatmance, as you can see in their Instagram posts sharing memories from this season of Below Deck Sailing Yacht. Ashley even joked about Tom's age (as she had spoken about wanting to date older men on the show) in one post with the deckhand from March 7: "He’s actually my favorite 24 year old."
Want more Below Deck Sailing Yacht? New episodes air every Monday at 8/7c.
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