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Dayna Kathan Explains Why She Got "Flustered and Upset" Over Scheana Shay's Psychic Gift
The Vanderpump Rules newcomer said "nothing is more sacred" to her than her late mom's memory.
Just as Scheana Shay and Dayna Kathan appeared to be moving forward in their friendship, they seemed to take two steps back in the April 21 episode of Vanderpump Rules.
After connecting with her late grandmother during a psychic reading, Scheana thought she would give Dayna the same opportunity to communicate with her late mother. So, Scheana thought she would surprise Dayna for her birthday and hire a psychic to do a reading with her fellow SURver at her apartment.
However, Dayna was caught off-guard by the gesture and respectfully declined Scheana's offer. But when Dayna realized that Scheana may not have been exactly telling the truth about the psychic already being at her apartment, she let her new friend know that she was not OK with her seeming dishonesty.
Dayna later explained her response to Scheana's gift in a lengthy note on Twitter on April 21. "I want to be really clear about something from tonight's episode. It wasn't lost on me that the thought of [Scheana]'s gift was incredibly sweet and I know her heart was in the right place," Dayna wrote. "I have reached out to at least three mediums since my mom died and I have backed out every single time because I am afraid of how I would feel if she did come through, and I am afraid of how I would feel if she didn't. That is something deeply personal, that I would not want to do on camera, or without my sister present."
She added, "It was clear Scheana's intentions were good but I felt flustered and upset that something so scary and intimate to me was happening with cameras present."
Dayna also clarified what she meant when she told Scheana that "you have not lost a parent. "When I said to her that she hadn't lost a parent I was just trying to help her understand how that reading might be different than others that she had personally had. It was not meant to be hostile, I'm happy she hasn't experienced that. But I know if you haven't, it can be hard to comprehend," she tweeted. "Everyone is different, maybe some people who lost the most important person in their life would want to have a reading, maybe they wouldn't mind doing it publicly. But that isn't the case for me."
Dayna concluded her note by saying that being so open with her entire life on Vanderpump Rules can sometimes have its challenges. "I know she wasn't being malicious, it was just a tough situation. I was just doing my best in a moment of feeling really vulnerable," she shared. "I know by participating in the show I put my life out there to be criticized, and I feel lucky that I can share pieces of my mom because I want people to know how incredible she was but it's a double edged sword because nothing is more sacred to me than her memory."
Scheana said that she "completely understood" why Dayna wasn't responsive to her gift during the Vanderpump Rules Season 8 After Show, above. "I thought it was a good surprise. I would have told you ahead of time if I thought it would have been bad," she explained, adding that she spoke to her mom and several of her friends about it beforehand. "Everyone thought like, 'Oh my god, this is so amazing. How thoughtful of you.' I was like, 'Right? This is a good idea. She's gonna love this.' Every person I asked was, 'Abso-f--king-lutely, I would love that.'"
However, Dayna claimed that she spoke to some of Scheana's friends who she supposedly consulted about the gift idea, and they said they told her not to move forward with it. "Scheana likes to ask people that will give her the response that she wants," Dayna said in the After Show. "Those are the type of people that Scheana likes to ask questions to, not people who will necessarily hold up a mirror."
Still, Scheana said that she really was just trying to do something nice for Dayna. "I meant this, it was like one of the most sincere gifts I've ever tried to do for someone. I was racking my brain for a month. I knew her birthday was coming up, and I'm like, 'I want to do something really special,'" she said. "And so for that to just bite me in the ass, I just felt so dumb, but it was coming from the bottom of my heart, and anyone who doesn't see that, I don't give a f--k because I had the best intentions."
Unfortunately, Dayna said that the whole thing "felt really icky" to her. "I think that she was trying to come off like a good person, like trying to have this good moment with me when she wasn't really thinking like, 'What would that be like for you? You still talk about your mom constantly. Her death has very much affected every part of your life,'" Dayna said. "Anyone who's spoken to me for two seconds knows that, so to just bring that to my house and not give me any time to prepare or not even tell me. Why didn't you call me?"
But Danica Dow came to Scheana's defense. "I mean, she wasn't trying to look like a good person; she was trying to be a good person at that time because I know she was super down all the time. I know that she felt super bad about the way that she had treated you because she voiced that to me all the time," Danica told Dayna during the After Show. "I feel like when she knows that she f--ked up or she knows that she did something wrong, she really internalizes it and is like, 'Oh my god, what can I do to make this better?' And sometimes her being so excited about an idea or eager to do something, she's blocking out harsh reality of what could actually backlash by doing this thing. And I think that's what happened in that situation because I don't think it was malicious whatsoever."
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