Being in a relationship with someone means getting to know all sides of their life, from their dreams and aspirations to what makes them tick. But being in love with someone also means that when the going gets tough, you don't immediately get going; but rather, you stay to figure out and work on your issues.
Stassi Schroeder and Beau Clark recently illustrated this when she experienced one of her first meltdowns in front of her boyfriend following her 30th birthday party this season of Vanderpump Rules (clip above). "What you guys saw on TV was part of it, and then there was a lot more of just frustration and anger and sadness after the cameras were off," Beau shared during a recent interview with The Daily Dish over the phone. "So that’s why we both look so ratchet on the balcony that next morning. We had a late night of drunken arguing, no one’s listening to each other, and it was frustrating."
Stassi became upset when she could neither find nor get a hold of Beau as he continued to socialize at her party. "It was sad, it was frustrating, because everyone was still there, she wanted to go to bed, I didn’t know she went to bed," Beau explained. "At this time, I’m still friends with everybody, but I’m not as close with them as I am now, but I’m like, 'These are all your people. Don’t you want me to get closer with them?'"
As we saw during the episode, Stassi and Beau had both calmed down by the time morning rolled around. "I felt bad, and she felt sad and remorseful, and we learned how to deal with it the next day," Beau said. "But we were just trying to figure out how to deal with it in the moment. That’s the tough part."
Beau said he had seen Stassi like this a couple of times before, but it was her "biggest" breakdown up to that point. In fact, it was a previous tense (but ultimately funny) moment with Stassi that inspired the now-iconic line Beau delivered during their discussion: "It's like you dick-punched my heart." Beau recalled to The Daily Dish the time he, Stassi, Katie Maloney-Schwartz, and Tom Schwartz were watching David Byrne perform at Coachella. Stassi became so upset that Beau wasn't responding to her text messages, she accidentally hit him in the — you guessed it — crotch. "So it became this thing like, 'You can’t just dick-punch somebody.' So in that moment it was serious, it was upsetting, but then throughout the month it became this fun thing where if she gets toasty or if she gets all Stassi, I’m like, 'Don’t go dick-punching me right now.' So the 'dick-punch my heart,' I don’t know why I said that, it just came out, but it was like, 'You hurt me again, but instead of dick-punching me, you dick-punched my heart this time. It wasn’t just my peen that you hurt. Now, it was my heart.'"
Beau also got to know Stassi's mom, Dayna Schroeder, a bit better while she was in town for her daughter's 30th birthday party. The visit also provided a couple of "awkward" moments for Beau in the episode, he admitted to The Daily Dish. In one instance, in which Dayna grabbed Beau's behind at the party, he shrugged it off as "playful." "I was totally fine with that," he said. "You know, it was awkward, but it wasn’t a big deal."
But his discussion with Stassi and Dayna about their relationship at Kristen Doute's James Mae launch event was another story. Beau said "it was awkward and rough" to hear Dayna's comments about Stassi's love life, especially when she remarked, "I think that he balances you out, but you're actually down here, and he's up here." "I’m a guy who’s not good with confrontation up front, so I kind of always laugh things off and try not to make a thing of it, but it just made me feel really sad for Stassi because from that I’m like, 'Oh, well, maybe that’s why you feel so insecure about things because your mom puts you down,'" Beau recalled. "So, just stuff like that popped into my head. It’s just sad, and I feel bad for Stassi."
Wanting to defend your girlfriend but also not offend her mom is not an easy place to be in. "I liked Dayna, and we met a handful of times, but it was still just like, I don’t know my place if I should be like, 'Hey, are you f--king kidding me?' Like, you don’t say that," Beau said. "So I’m just thankful that Schwartz called my name, and I just left that environment."
Following that episode of Vanderpump Rules, Dayna posted a lengthy note on Instagram explaining her behavior and apologizing to Stassi and Beau for her comments and actions. "Nastassia [Stassi's real name] knows how much I love her and how I think she is the most confident, smart, witty, kindhearted, loving girl. I am so proud of her and all of her accomplishments!" Dayna wrote. "I do however, have to step back and tell myself that people that don't know me or us, don't get to see our rapport together... And that's why people who don't personally know us would think that I was SERIOUSLY saying those wise cracks to Beau and Stassi to be that horrible of a mother? I was trying to be 'that embarrassing funny mom.' And I get it. If I saw this show and someone's mother was laughing and teasing her daughter unmercifully, I would think she was awful [too]. But ya'll have no idea how loving and close of a family we are. Including Beau and the girls and their wonderful mothers. I'm very sorry if I offended anyone in our group that day."
Something that was expressed to Beau by both Stassi and Dayna was the fear of this relationship ending. "You know, when [Stassi] talked about the fear of losing me, I just don’t know where it comes from. I don’t know if this is the right word for it, but it’s that abandonment issue. And I’ve asked her, 'Do you have abandonment issues?'" Beau said. "But then, realizing a lot of the guys she was with before were kind of douchebags, and I don’t know if they abandoned her, but it’s just something she’s gotta figure out."
But Beau is definitely here to stay. "We talk about it. I’m like, 'I’m not leaving you. I’m not going anywhere. I love you. I’m here.' But in certain moments she’ll get these feelings, and I’m just trying to figure out a way that we both know how I can check in with her more when I’m out and make sure that she’s feeling comfortable with herself and everything like that," Beau shared. "But it doesn’t freak me out or anything; it’s just frustrating because I’m like, 'I love you! I’m not leaving! Why the f--- are you thinking like this? Jesus!'"
Find out what makes Stassi and Beau's relationship so special, below.