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The Daily Dish Southern Charm

Why Did Kathryn C. Dennis Finally Call It Quits with Thomas Ravenel?

"It was a long time coming," the #SouthernCharm mom told The Daily Dish.

By Laura Rosenfeld

We've watched Kathryn C. Dennis and Thomas Ravenel's tumultuous relationship play out over two seasons of Southern Charm. However, the famously on-again, off-again couple has officially split — and this time, it's for good. "I know I've said that a lot, but we are definitely, officially, over," Kathryn told The Daily Dish Monday. "Taylor Swift said it: 'We're never, ever, ever getting back together.'"

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It was Thomas' behavior following the birth of their second child, son St. Julien, in November 2015 (the two also have a 2-year-old daughter named Kensington) that convinced Kathryn it was time to call it quits. "Well, it was a long time coming. I think what really motivated it was that I had Julien in November, and I had hoped that having two children, something would fall into place somehow, magically," Kathryn said. "[Thomas] was talking about marriage in the hospital. He really wanted to make it work. And then he just flipped a switch, changed, and I don't know. I kind of was just realizing my kids were more important than the way I feel about him romantically."

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A photo posted by Kathryn Calhoun Dennis (@kathryndennis) on

Now that Kathryn and Thomas are officially over, the Southern Charm mom says co-parenting with her ex has been a challenge, but she hasn't given up hope just yet. "It's a work in progress," she said. "I'm confident that we'll reach a place in time where we can peacefully do that." 

However, she and Thomas still have some issues to work out. "I will be honest. There's been questionable behavior. I'm sure people see it on social media, every platform he blasts me on," Kathryn said. "So that's not been fun, but you know, hopefully he'll get over that."

Kathryn said the series of tweets she posted criticizing Thomas in February were in response to what he had been posting about her on social media, not to a since-deleted Instagram photo of himself with an unidentified woman on Valentine's Day, as it appeared at the time. "I didn't even see that [photo] before I posted [the tweets]. Someone sent that to me after I tweeted," Kathryn said. "I feel like I've been so lied about publicly by him that I don't know, I just kind of caved, and I don't even remember what I tweeted, but I tweeted something finally. I felt really stupid afterwards because I don't like to stoop to his level, but it's hard to be lied about, especially when it's parenting and children."

Just as Kathryn said on Twitter in February, she said that Thomas is still not paying child support today. "I've gone without electricity. I've gone without heating and air. He doesn't even ask me if I'm OK. He doesn't care at all," Kathryn told The Daily Dish. "But that's fine. I'm gonna make it work on my own. I always have, and I'll figure it out."

Kathryn on Tweeting about Personal Drama

Thomas had at one time been seeing their kids every two weeks, but Kathryn said she hasn't let him see them in about five weeks. "It's not because I'm trying to be mean to him. It's not motivated by my own personal hatred," Kathryn said. "It's motivated by the simple fact that I don't know if I feel comfortable trusting him alone with them right now, given his behavior and the company he has."

Thomas responded to Kathryn's claims that she tweeted about in February. “Here are the facts: I don’t have the right to see the kids. She won’t let me see them,” Thomas said in an interview with the Charleston City Paper. “I’m paying child support, even though I don’t have to. I’m not using the power of the purse. She’s using the power of the kids by not letting me see them, ruthlessly and to their detriment.”

Thomas later told The Daily Dish that Kathryn hasn't responded to his attempts to make things right with her. “She refuses to respond to my offer of $4,500 per month with my paying 80 percent of all medical and education costs and we'd split custody 50/50. This would be court ordered which means it would protect her in that if I didn't pay I'd be thrown in jail," he said. "Also, she has rejected three mediation dates claiming that SHE would be out of town. She is also on her third attorney."

Ultimately, Kathryn realized that she lost herself when she and Thomas were together. "Thomas is very troubled, so he's a lot to handle. Whenever I was with him, it was always constantly placating him, constantly being his therapist. I gave everything to him, literally. I devoted myself completely to him, whether or not people believe that I loved him genuinely or not, I truly did, and I will stand by that until I die," she said. "In that same period, I forgot what I loved to do, what I think. I had to kind of always conform just so he wouldn't have an outburst. I lost myself. I stopped painting, I stopped modeling, I stopped caring. Now that I'm not with him, I'm realizing things I love again."

The road to successfully and peacefully co-parenting is going to be a bumpy one for Kathryn and Thomas this season of Southern Charm. Here's what you can expect, below.

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