Scott: I would like another version of me in a beaded gown and a champagne glass to show up and talk to me and tell me what to do.
Emerson: I don't want a hotter version of myself showing up anywhere. It's like being the ugly twin.
Kenya: What the hell is going on? I understand she’s a virgin, but she ain't stupid is she? Damn!
Emerson: Technically I’m still a virgin. I was saving myself for marriage...and then the gay thing happened.
Scott: We pitch it, they buy it, we sell it, we’re rich for the rest of our lives.
Blake: Just seventeen steps and we’re rich.
Brandy: Hey Sharks, we’re tools.
Andrew: Once they’re out, they shouldn’t be allowed to talk
Julie: You tell him, Andy!
Lamont: They need to adds chairs that spin around like on The Voice. They don't even need to look at the product no more. They just need to be like, “You’re dead to me.”
Blake: Can you imagine what turn of the century rehab was like?
Emerson: Well, there wasn't any!
Blake: It was no “Promises Malibu”, I’ll tell you that.
Kenya: Clive Owen needs a deep, long bubble bath with peppermint oil.
