Wicked City - ABC

Sue: Is it like Sex and the City?
Teddi: No, no. It's more about crime.

Blakr: That's how you die in Hollywood. You give a bad blowjob, you're out.
Emerson: It's also how you get cast is to give a good one.

Julie Egber: I want to be a cop. I could go to Whiskey A Go-Go undercover!

Supergirl - CBS

Julie: I did make a superhero character in college called 'The Lesbionic Woman.' Brandy: Well, that's a shocker.

Blake: So she moved to LA and became Anne Hathaway in The Devil Wear Prada?
Emerson: Glasses, hair down, save the world!
Scott: I've jumped thinking I could fly and nothing happened.

Pretty Strong - Oxygen

Julie I believe they're, like, lingerie football players.
Brandy: Oh my god, that's so hot!

Kenya: Their cheeks are eating the material.

Rashawn: What position would you play if you were on the team?
Princella: The coach.

Manzo’d with Children - Bravo

Sarah Resnick: Their family is as thick as thieves. Just like us.
Joe Resnick: Aw, I like that!

Andrew Egber: Julie, you're like 'Egber'd with Children.'

Scott: I worry every day what my hair is going to look like on my wedding.

Scott: Alright, let's start planning my wedding.
Blake: Do we have to find the groom first?
Scott: Ugh, do we have to?

American Humane Association Hero Dog Awards -Hallmark Channel

Kenya: They're having awards for dogs.
Amanda: These aren't just dogs, they're hero dogs!

Princella: They really dressed up for these dogs. These dogs don't know y'all got on dresses.

Emerson: Can we talk about the elephant in the room that is that none of the dogs understand what is happening? They're like, 'Where's the steak?'

Hellavator - Game Show Network

Princella: It's three black people? Y'all ain't gonna make it, I can tell you that right now.

Brandy: The Twisted Twins have a job and we don't.

Ayn: What does YOLO mean? Google YOLO.
Sue: Google can't be reached. But it's 92 in Burbank.

Sue: They're so happy.
Ayn: Well, I would be happy if I had $28,000.
Sue: If you left me in the toaster? Yeah, how about that, Ayn?

DWTS - ABC

Scott: Tom Bergeron's old man outfit is amazing.
Emerson: Leah Remini doesn't need a costume, she already survived the Scientology horror movie.

Brandy: Dancing with the Vine Stars? Nope!

Sarah: Does [Bindi Irwin] have an accent?
Rachel: Yeah she's freaking Crocodile Dundee's daughter!
Joe: She's not Crocodile Dundee's daughter, she's Steve Irwin's daughter.
Nicole: Well, he talks about crocodiles, okay?

Cutthroat Kitchen - Food Network

Lamont: How is this your favorite show if you can't even cook?
Rashawn: It don't matter.

Amanda: Food, money, you're all up in my alley right here!

Emerson: God, these puns are like everyone's grandpa showed up to cook.