An Intervention and Several Nights in Paris

Bonjour my favorite Parisians! How are you doing on this magical day? Are you feeling the French vibes? Or are you feeling like perhaps you're having a little too many croissants (and by croissants I mean cocktails)? Let's try to get a handle on this week's episode and see.

Turtle Time
We open with Kim taking her new noes over to Kyle's to visit. Kim has nowhere to sit in her own house, as it turns out, so she's popped over to her sister's to look at the turtles and discuss Taylor. She wants to tell Taylor that she's worried about her recent flightly and perhaps alcohol-fueled behavior. So the ladies decided to do a little pop by at Ms. Armstrong's to chat.

Taylor explains that the issue with Kennedy was hand-off confusion between her nanny and her mother, but Kim believes that it goes beyond what happened at her party. Taylor's had quite a year so you can't fault her for finding various ways to cope, but if it's out-of-control than that's another issue entirely. It was difficult watching Taylor face her issues, but really heartwarming to see Kim step up in her sobriety and help someone struggling with the same issues she had.

Swan Lake
Meanwhile at Swan Lake, Lisa and Ken are pondering the different sorts of swans swimming. This is a delightful metaphor for Lisa's relationship with her stepson, Warren, and his slightly elder wife, Sue (who was once a BFF of Lisa). While initially Lisa's swan was unhappy, the swans are all getting along now perfectly so she can jet of to Saint Tropez to hang with everyone incident-free. The bigger issues is, of course, whatever will Gig wear?!?

Speaking of civilized relationships between awkward dating situations, Yolanda and Mohammed are so cheerfully friendly that she's throwing a party at the abode she designed for him. God bless these two for splitting up and keeping it so delightfully kind. Surely they must have some handbook for amicable divorces in the works.

With all that love flowing around, the stars somehow aligned that Lisa, Kyle, and Yolanda were going to be in Paris at the same time. And so then, shouldn't everyone be in Paris? Ah the life. If three out of seven Housewives are there, shouldn't they all be? With that kind of quorum book a plane ticket!

However, it can't all be booking full rows of planes with a smile. Before Yolanda took to Kayak, Orbitz, or what have you to help the other ladies book their tickets, she took this opportunity to very bluntly ask Taylor what the deal is with the rumors she's heard behind her back. Yolanda just wants to go to Starbucks with her. Can't they work it over with a latte? Just a Trenta to clear the air? Kyle does clear up that it's not about Yolanda, but about David and his relationship with Linda. Somehow I doubt this will be the last time Yolanda offers Taylor a Starbucks gift card to sort this out. Cake pops anyone?

Family Matters
Next we see Lisa, Ken, and Giggy finally make it to Saint Tropez. Shockingly enough they aren't just visiting Ken' son and his wife -- but also Ken's grandson. Yes, Ken is proud papa not only to Giggy (and Pandora and Max) but also grandpapa to Warren's son. What an adoarble brood (and no I don't just mean because Giggy is involved).

While Lisa's already sipping champagne in France, the rest of the ladies are trying to get themselves out of the U.S. Kim is relieved to be at a place in her life where packing is far less laborious, lending us to a flashback of her late arrival (see: non-arrival) for the ladies' Hawaii flight. Apparently back in the day, Kim was sneaking a lot of wine in her Starbucks cups (perhaps that's why Yolanda wanted her and Taylor to gab at Starbucks so badly). It's amazing seeing Kim and Kyle start to open up and enjoy each other's company.

Sadly, one of the gals does not make it. Marisa's father-in-law passed away. Thankfully the Zanucks got the news before getting on the plane, the small silver lining in the darkest moment.

Once the gals make it to Paris, the bottles are immediately popped. Giggy comes in his best Parisian duds (sadly not a beret) and all appears to be going grandly. That is until Kim is noticeably late and oddly erratic.

Well, the ladies did say there would be fireworks.

Next week the ladies have some trouble with ducks and drama at the Eifel Tower. Until then, what was your favorite part of the Parisian excursion so far? Giggy on his own? Yolanda's blunt pre-summit with Taylor? Brandi pondering the rules of a threesome? Leave it in the comments!