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I'll Be OK

Jacqueline reflects on Audriana's birth, hiring a life coach, Danielle's name changes and more.

By Jacqueline Laurita

 

How to Watch

Watch The Real Housewives of New Jersey Season 14 premiere May 5th at 8/9c on Bravo and stream next day on Peacock.

I want to start off by saying that I really enjoyed giggling at every scene that involved Joe, Teresa, her labor and birth. Hilarious! Teresa goes into labor so she first decides to make her bed with a gazillion pillows. She then packs her bags for the hospital with brand new clothes (I saw the tags hanging on them), a whole makeup case (OK ... maybe I would have done that too) and plenty of jewelry (you know, the norm). Don't you all bring a good jewelry selection while you're on bed rest in a hospital bed for days? No? Yeah well me neither, but welcome to Teresa World. While Joe is taking his time, drinking a fresh cup of coffee with his shirt off, Teresa is checking her emails, making french toast for her daughter, all while she is already an hour late to check in to the hospital and in the process of losing her birthing room. "Teresa is late, Teresa is always late." That's why I suggested that maybe she knit a sweater for the baby before it was born. She seemed to have the time for everything else. I loved when Joe said, "I told you you couldn't wear your own outfit." Then Teresa said, "Gross." Typical Teresa. I had that epidural when I gave birth to Ashley. It's not very enjoyable. Wish I didn't actually see it. DANG THAT NEEDLE IS BIG! All of you expecting Mommies, have no fear, it goes so fast you won't even remember it. It looks worse than it actually feels. Joe knows just what to say to Teresa to calm her down. She's in the delivering room, screaming her ass off, while he's talking about the fear of throwing up his hamburger. Haha! That was good TV. This is all real non-scripted reality TV GOLD! REALLY Teresa ... one and a half pushes??? That's IT? You have been doing some serious Kegels my friend. WOW! God Bless you. You are truly an amazing woman!

Audriana is born. A.U.D.R.I.A.N.A. Beautiful baby! I thought it was really sweet for Nicholas to bring her a rose. Too bad he wasn't awake to give it to her personally and be a gentleman by taking his hat off in the presence of a little lady. He slept through it all. Typical man. I hope he didn't blow his chances one day. First impressions are so important. It would be a sweet story someday if they ever did end up together. Teresa and Joe's family were family friends and Joe was at the hospital the day Teresa was born as well. True story. I wonder if he brought her a rose.

How many of you cried at that touching scene when Teresa told Dina she was the Godmother? That was the sweetest moment between friends. They have been friends for over 15 years. It was meant to be. Can you only imagine what Audriana's Christening will be like? Think wedding. Seriously, you will want to stay tuned for this one.

The life coach idea was something that a friend of mine suggested to me. It is something that had helped her. The life coach asks you a series of questions about your interests, your skills, your strengths, your weaknesses, and more and can help lead you in a direction that you didn't even think of or knew existed. They can help guide you, give you a focus, and give you or lead you to tools to accomplish your goals. I figured that since Ashley wouldn't listen to us that she just might listen to an outside source. It was just a suggestion. Ashley and my husband apparently thought it was a nonsense approach and we are clearly not on the same page with that one. Can't blame me for trying. I guess I will just leave it to Ashley to figure it out since she knows everything. It is, after all, HER future.

 

I will now address the gun situation. When Chris got the safe, I was told it was meant to put certain things in there in case there was ever a fire. I didn't know he was preparing for war for Godsake. I just don't question those things. Chris is the only one who knows the combination to that safe. Every gun is licensed and unloaded. It was only me being silly when I said, "At least I don't THINK that they're loaded." I knew they weren't. Some of his guns are collectibles that have never been fired and never will be. The one in my hand was actually just a pellet gun. It wasn't real. That ginormous one was actually used in Iraq and is a very powerful one. (So I'm told.) I was weirded out and uncomfortable with having guns in the house with kids there, but once Chris told me the guns weren't loaded and I knew they were kept in a safe that only Chris could access, I quickly got over that fear and wanted to play Annie Oakley. For those that don't know, Annie was a sharpshooter and exhibition shooter in the late 1800s and early 1900s. I would NEVER shoot an animal or human being unless my life depended on it or the life of someone I love. Chris is doing nothing illegal in having those guns. Under the Second Amendment to the United States Constitution it states : A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms, shall not be infringed. My husband does not abuse this right.

Christopher. What a business mind that kid has. I loved that he shadowed employees of businesses in which he was interested in pursuing. I can't think of a better way to help him decide if he is making the right career choices. There is always so much more to a job than what people might originally assume. I like that he rolled up his sleeves, got his creative mind flowing and got to work. For a kid that just turned 21, I think he is very business driven and has a great work ethic. Christopher works 15 hour days and saves a lot of his money. I think he has even started investing some of it. Whatever career path he chooses, I believe he will be very successful. I am interested in knowing what he will end up doing one day. I'm very proud of him. I'm proud of all my nieces and nephews.

During my scene with Dina and Caroline, you didn't get to hear most of my commentary. I had a lot to say. I thought that if Dina felt like she needed to confront Danielle, I supported her in doing so, but I knew that it wouldn't end up going the way she was planning it. Danielle does not take rejection well. Dina going to see her just to tell her she never wanted to see her or have anything to do with her was a waste of time and only engaging and enraging a beast. When I made the decision to end my friendship with Danielle, I ended it. I never felt the need to tell her I was done with her, I just was. I'm sure she got the message when I never spoke to her again. The calls stopped. If Danielle cared enough to ask me why I cut my ties to her then I would have been very honest with her and given her my many reasons. She knew why and knew better than to ask me. Done. I would never seek someone out just to say, "I don't like you, don't ever contact me again." I'd wait for them to approach me, then I'd tell them. I have no problem with honesty. Dina really felt the need to speak with Danielle to find closure to the Danielle drama, and that is her choice. So be it. Let's wait and watch how that worked out for her.

 

Introducing tweetle dumb and tweetle dumber! Are these guys actually coming on national TV and playing that Wangster card? Seriously? No one is listening Danielle, and nobody cares! If Danny really was the wiseguy he and Danielle are trying so hard to portray him to be, I am SURE his superiors are not too happy with him right now. I don't think a real wiseguy would go on national TV and announce that to the world. It wouldn't be very smart. Although, it might be good for his acting career. Hmmm. Danielle did nothing but make herself look like a paranoid lunatic who brings ex felons around her and into the lives of her children. Danielle claims 25 years ago she fell into the wrong crowd. Does she feel that today she is surrounding herself with a better crowd? Check again, devout Catholic. Birds of a feather, huh? Are felons even allowed to associate with other felons while on probation? I thought that was not allowed. Is it appropriate for Danielle to choose to bring those felons, for the reasons she chose to bring them, to a sensitive benefit for a family who is fighting for their daughter's life? I don't think so. Let's just see what kind of drama Danielle decides bring to this benefit to make it all about her. Watch what happens.

Danielle claims she fears Caroline because why? Caroline called her garbage to her face a year ago at the reunion show. She has had ZERO contact from her since then up until that point. I can't see the reasoning behind her decision to recruit back up. Sometimes the truth just hurts. She needs to quit proving Caroline right and move on with her life like her rent-a-priest told her. Enough is enough Beverly, Angela, Danielle, Merrill, Minilli, Maher, Morrelli, Staub!

Get ready for the snarky Jacqueline. This season I am angry and bitter at Danielle and have a hard time controlling it. So much was going on behind the scenes as well as on camera that I was getting increasingly annoyed. When I'm angry, I vent for a while, but then I get over it and eventually move on. I'm almost there. This show rehashes some of it that I had thought I had already let go. It's hard when I am reliving it on TV and watching scenes I've never seen before. I promise you there is a light at the end of the tunnel for me. Be patient and try to understand what I went through. If you can't relate, I guess you can't relate. I am only human and I tend to react on my emotions at times. I'll be OK.

Please, if anyone is interested in helping the family of the beautiful little girl with the rare form of cancer, Emanuela, to help the pay for treatments, go to emanuelasheartforhope.com. It really would be so much appreciated. The family needs all the love, prayers, hope and help they can get. Thank you.

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