Love Hard, Fight Hard

Let me start off by saying how proud and happy I am for Christine getting the opportunity to model with the best in the industry! Christine, I always thought you were a beautiful girl. You have a lot going for you. Always stay true to who you are and what you believe in. Do you remember our private talk we had out back of your house last year? Just remember that you control your own life and you make your own choices. Nobody else can tell you how to feel about another human being or about a particular situation. You should always stand up for how you feel, what you believe in, and make the right choices for what's right for you and don't you EVER be afraid to respectfully express that to ANYbody. Be strong and when you need help, don't be afraid to ask for it. You're a great kid and I know you'll go far. I wish you the best of everything. I wish Jillian the same. You are great kids.

Danielle, stop looking at yourself in those scenes and take a closer look into your daughters eyes and what she's crying out to say. PAY ATTENTION, PUH-LEASE!!! Three words for you this week: CALCULATING, TRANSPARENT and NARCISSISTIC! I hope you see it.You talk about our "true colors showing"? What chu talkin' bout, rainbow bright? Again, Danielle's scenes speak for themselves. No explanation needed.

Prior to filming, in a desperate attempt to maintain her position on the show, Danielle reached out to me to apologize for all of her wrong doings and swore she was a changed person and was moving forward in a positive direction. Even knowing the hell she put everyone through with her lies and everything else that she did, a part of me still felt sorry for her and wanted to believe that she truly wanted yet another chance. She seemed desperate. She went after me because she was hurt by what she saw I said on the show last year. I still don't see what I said that was so horrible. I was always honest with her from day one and I always gave her the benefit of the doubt. If I heard a rumor, of which there were MANY, I always confronted her with it like she had asked me to. (Then she lied to my face.)

ANYway ... I told her before we started filming that I accepted her apologies and I apologized to her as well if I had hurt her and she agreed that we would move forward as "peaceful acquaintances." Too much had happened and I really didn't trust her 100% with everything that she had done, but I didn't wish her any harm. I wanted to go my way and I wanted her to go her way. I told her I wouldn't talk poorly of her either. I did wish her and her children well. If I saw her out in public I would treat her respectfully and not make her uncomfortable. I told her that this was all I could offer her right now and that my husband was also uncomfortable with her as well. I wasn't going to cut her out 100% from my life, but I wasn't going to let her 100% in. She told me she respected that and understood my reasons why and that it was all she could ask for. I would text her from time to time congratulating her every time I heard great news about her or Christine. I told her that I wouldn't be hanging out with her, but she still continued to call me to do things with her anyway, knowing that my answer would be no. I feel like she enjoys putting me in awkward and uncomfortable situations. Friends don't do that to each other. I feel that she's a very calculating person. Besides what I was hearing her say about me around town combined with leaving those two empty chairs at her luncheon and making an announcement to everyone as to why I wasn't there just proved to me that she hadn't changed. She still has a vendetta against me and my family for rejecting her.

INTRODUCING....The HAM GAME! Why do I get the feeling that this is the beginning of the ham game revolution? I know it's not good to waste food so I'm going to assume that the particular ham they were playing with was slimy, old, smelly ham. Albie, Christopher and Lauren have a very tight bond and a lot of love for one another. I find it refreshing and special. I get why Albie thinks it's weird that his best friend is dating his sister. Being best friends, they must know a LOT about each other including, but not limited to, each other's dating history. It's likely they both have information they don't want privy to Lauren. If Vito and Lauren were to ever break up, where would that leave Vito and Albie's friendship? It would be a very awkward situation for Albie. In Lauren and Vito's defense, it's true that you can't really control who you fall in love with, especially when they spent so much time together. Of course everyone wants them to be happy and we all know they are, but Albie is being a forward thinker in this situation. Don't think to much Albie. Take it day by day. Life is full of too many "What if's." Let the cards fall where they may. It's out of your control now.

I know Caroline can sometimes come off abrasive in what she is trying to say in warning me about things or in giving me advice, but I have to admit that she is usually spot on! Caroline is a very wise woman. She has the ability to foresee how certain situations will play out. She reads people well. She has street smarts. In retrospect, I don't think she meant any harm in mentioning Danielle's children. I think she meant what I saw in this episode while studying Christine's eyes. Her kids' eyes say a lot to me. What Caroline said about Danielle's children was not meant to be derogatory. It was simply to say that she believes that they have seen and heard too much and that their innocence have been robbed. I get it.

Gia, YOU GO GIRL! I admire your confidence. If you have a passion for something, don't let anyone tell you that you can't do it. Never give up. Believe in yourself. Don't worry Gia, you were 8 years old in that episode, you won't be 4 foot tall forever.;0) You're too cute! Teresa, great job in supporting your child!

Well, as you can see, Ashley and I are definitely going through something this season. We love hard, we fight hard. Unfortunately this will not be the last of the fighting you will see between us. I hope mothers of teenage daughters will understand. I worry about her. I will always worry. I actually bought my daughter a breathalyzer key chain to keep on her at all times to test the driver at any time to see if they are over the drinking limit before she enters a car with somebody. I told her to call me and I will come get her ANY time she is in that situation where someone has been drinking. I NEVER want her to take that chance. There are so many worries a parent continues to have once their child has left the nest, especially when you feel they weren't prepared to leave. It's so hard dealing with a strong-willed child, especially one that has reached the legal adult age of 18. I'm not sure I know my boundaries anymore. The only control over her that we seem to have with her moving out is cutting her off financially from us completely. She wants independence, she will get independence. Watch what happens...