Leap of Faith

Ooh, I’m on my fourth latte and hoping that it will make me write faster. Either that or I will shortly start spinning in circles and maybe turn into Martin Scorsese. That should be interesting.

So, the parenting book. First of all let’s clear one thing up. LuAnn seemed to think it is about child behavior by us as experts, which it is not. It’s a collection of stories about things we’ve experienced as parents -- the good, the bad and the downright ugly, and what we learned from them. For example, when someone insists you bring your children out somewhere you wouldn’t normally take them and there is the possibility that the evening might run overtime, you might be distracted and asked repeatedly to stay “just a little longer” when it’s clear they’ve had enough, just say NO to bringing the kids. This is made much worse when it’s being televised.

Our book is lighthearted, fun and in places poignant. I was particularly inspired when pregnant by anecdotal stories from the trenches of parenting. In 2004 I began writing my own from an urban perspective, with both parents’ take, as we all know that moms and dads often have different views of an incident much like viewers have different opinions of our show. When your four year old writes and performs a song called “Putting to Death is Not Nice,” one parent might be horrified while the other thinks it’s hilarious, and agrees that indeed, putting anyone/thing to death is in fact not nice and happy to know the kid thinks so too.

Jill came over to our house, and we all sat on the sun-bleached garden chairs and shared the bagels she thoughtfully brought. We all had a great time that day and it’s a shame you don’t really see the fun we had. The boys had great fun checking out the demolition area – all the upstairs work happened behind a deadbolted and plastic-sealed door so Jill’s visit was the first time since returning from St. Barths that the kids had seen it. Although I love Jill, she showed her lack of imagination in this scene. Is architectural detail worthless if it’s not from a townhouse on 5th Avenue? Of course not – it was a telling comment.

We were happy to buy our fabric & blinds from Zarin – they are a dealer for Hunter Douglas whom we’ve used twice in the past, and we switched suppliers to give Zarin the business. Jill and Brad had some great fabric ideas which you’ll see later on. In the mean time, we took Jill through our temporary sleeping area and she was horrified. During the worst of the mess we stayed in the hotel, after which we camped out for 2 months in François’ room which you saw in all its untidy glory during the tour. Our living area was the finished basement, which although fuller than normal, was home sweet home during the work. At that time we also had one full & complete bathroom, refinished after the plumbing work in phase one last year (a bathroom that has yet to make its TV debut!) As for Jill’s comment about the effect that platform bed may have had on our relationship, it’s a lack of imagination again. Really folks, is a bed always necessary? Those of you who didn’t want to see or think of us in swim / spa wear will now have nightmares. You’re welcome.

Also this week I met up with Bethenny to help out at her booth during a yoga event in Central Park. Loved the opening shot with the fog hanging like a cap over the tents, and if it was a bad hair competition, I won strands-down. We passed out cupcakes and cookies, then went for a walk around the fair and talked relationships. I think it’s a huge leap of faith to trust someone – you don’t know whether they will honor your trust and reciprocate or trample through your emotions like a St. Bernard through a flowerbed. Sometimes you just have to begin with no expectations other than a good time – I certainly didn’t expect to find Simon when I logged onto a dating site ten years ago. My thoughts? Don’t overthink things, or be so careful and protective that you miss out on a nice evening. Oh, and I had to laugh when listening to myself tell Bethenny that I took Simon’s number and called him when I was back in town. Who else gives that advice? I was happy to share my experiences with Bethenny, and she’ll do what is right for her. I must admit, I do not think that LuAnn’s suggestion to lean in, be seductive and not so damned equal was particularly helpful – I cannot see Bethenny inclining herself across the table to snag a man.

I got emotional all over again watching myself talk about Simon and our wedding night. Do I think everyone should have the same sort of relationship we do? No – that’s neither possible nor advisable, and not everyone wants what we have. Do I consider myself lucky every day? Yes. Yes, I do.

Until next week…check out Simon’s blog, now right here on Bravo’s site, and week one of our renovation blog over on www.mccordvankempen.com.