Ask the Countess: Party Do's and Don'ts

Hi,
While watching the show I have heard Jill and you say that you are Native American. What kind of Native American are you? I know you do a lot of charity work, does any of that consist of helping your heritage? It seem you concentrate more on your husbands family line.
Thank you for your time.
A fellow Native

Hi fellow Native,
I'm from a branch of the Algonquins called the Micmac. I'm very proud of my heritage. Amongst others, I support the American Cancer Society as well as helping the Ace Partnership for the homeless. I try to give to organizations that serve everyone.
The Countess

Countess, can you give us your top Do's and Don'ts for being a Party Guest? We would like to share it with our readers at http://partybluprintsblog.blogspot.com/
Thanks!
Dawn Sandomeno
Partybluprints.com

Do
Bring gift hostess
Offer to help
Help the hostess keeping conversation alive and engaging
Make a toast to your hostess
Tell good jokes

Don't
Bring food as a gift that might not complement what she has organized
Drink too much
Monopolize the conversation
Stack plates at the table to be helpful
Tell racist jokes

Dear Countess,
My grandmother recently passed away. Although she had many friends and family, we had a very simple, private burial for her in accordance with her wishes. My question is what do I do with the thank you cards supplied by the funeral home. Do I use them for people who sent sympathy cards, the few who attended the burial, or anyone who helped during her final days, or all of the above?
Thank you for your help,
Anne

Hi Anne
So sorry to hear. If you like the cards, why not use them to say thank you.
The Countess

Countess,
Please advise me on this situation. When dining out is it necessary to profusely thank the server every time they come to the table. My dining companion stops our conversations and thanks the server for just about everything they do. Therefore interrupting our social time for the service person. I believe you should thank them after giving you order and then if you make a special request during the meal. Do you really have to thank them for doing their job through out the whole meal? I am really confused about the whole protocol of this - I watch your show and don't see this when you and the girls are out.
Thanks
Loretta

Hi Loretta,
Please and thanks are necessary but I think a nod in the right direction or a smile of appreciation will do in this case. Interrupting conversation is not polite to your dining companions.
The Countess

Dear Countess,
I am about to host a dinner party in May. I have a friend who has declined at the last minute, for both herself and her spouse, the last two parties that I've hosted. Both times she called in a few hours before the event claiming illness. I was really annoyed the second time she pulled this stunt because I was cooking as well as hosting and the main ingredient for the entree was very expensive. The leftovers were wonderful for lunch but I could not help but feel disappointed. I should mention that this is a very old friend that I've known for over twenty years who was responsible for introducing me to my husband. Should I give her another chance? Invitations go out next week.
Thank you!

Hi,
Don't be annoyed, tell her how you feel. There is nothing wrong with that. Otherwise, it's three strikes and you're out!
The Countess