One Big Dysfunctional Family

I really have enjoyed opening up my life to you this season. Thanks for your support, for your therapy, for buying Naturally Thin and for accepting me for the rough around the edges person that I am.

I became involved in the fashion show when the head of Royal Air Maroc airline and the Moroccan tourism board asked me to host an evening. I think they wanted it to be light and fun, and because of my coloring I could probably pass off as Moroccan. It was a lot of work hosting, emceeing and walking in the show, but all the work paid off and it was such a magical night. I was shattered afterwards and so happy that the girls came. Everyone loved it!

Walking in the show was fun simply because I didn't fall and didn't look like a complete moron. Ford Models isn't reaching out anytime soon.

LuAnn gave me some fun, simple modeling tips. I didn't care all that much. It was just fun and childlike to practice modeling, which is so foreign to me. I never took ballet so grace isn't my forte. The tips helped, but ultimately you have to do things your own way. I don't take myself so seriously. Even falling would have been funny. I'm not surprised Kelly didn't come. She probably had other plans.

All the dating tips are helpful, but everyone ultimately does what is best for them. I don't want anyone else's relationship, so I think taking other people's relationship advice can be dangerous and tricky. I'm not the same as any of the other wives, nor should my relationship be.

Jill admittedly picks every battle and Ramona stirred her up. I had no clue about the Frangelico signage. Who can blame a brand for wanting credit when donating a 25k bar? I didn't care at all who got credit, nor was I there when the signage went up. I was asked for a SkinnyGirl bar. The cocktails are very popular and I'm paid to do those bars around the country. I just did what Jill asked. I think the step and repeat conversation was tacky, and I think selling behind the bar ad space is tacky. The only thing that bothered me was that Jill talked about me behind my back to her nemesis. Not cool, but Jill apologized. I love her, I accept it and we fight like girlfriends do. I got in too deep and Jill was stressed and nervous about her speech. The makeup sex was immediate and good.

My favorite moment this season was when I said, "He works my weave." Did I say that? I find it funny that people sometimes call me a socialite. Um, socialites don't say weave. LOL.

I wish people saw me rollerblade with Ally Zarin in the park and more of the non-green white SUV scene with Jill. Jill and I are the best together. Truly Laverne & Shirley. Though I'm not sure who is who. Or maybe we're Lucy and Ethel. I'm Lucy, but not based on looks. I'm always into some kind of trouble or caper.

I find the Jill's scenes most entertaining, because she has no idea she's being funny. I like when Ramona gets worked up, when Kelly repeatedly refers to herself as a journalist who has to go to parties, and I like when LuAnn asked Kelly about dating, and Kelly responds as though she's being grilled for classified information. I really loved my scene with Gloria. The whole season was great - it is a rose with both petals and thorns. The show is absurd, and the reunion is even more absurd. The reunion was like Vietnam and I keep having flashbacks. It really was war and nothing was left unsaid. It felt like shock therapy. It was so nuts that it has to be two hours. Certain people will surprise you more than others.

Thank you Bravo. You've put me in a more dysfunctional family than words can describe. You can't write this stuff, which is why truth is stranger and bigger and better than fiction. None of this is scripted!

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