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Good for the Gander

Jill addresses why she wanted to clear the air with Ramona, and her anti-bullying campaign.

By Jill Zarin

Hi everyone!

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I have been busy this week working on the new packaging for my Skweez Couture Shapewear, Hosiery, and Legging line. I haven't done this in a while so it was harder than I remember! I can't wait for you to see it. Please follow me on twitter @skweezcouture and Facebook SKWEEZ COUTURE for updates. We will have a few styles ready to ship early, so sign up for my newsletter at This week, I will include behind-the-scenes photos from Season 4 and exclusive fun facts! Secrets Of A Jewish Mother is now out in paperback and has an added chapter on bullying that my mom, Gloria has many words of advice to share. Autographed copies are available Jill Zarin bedding is available at

It was interesting seeing LuAnn and Ramona have lunch together. I am so grateful that LuAnn tried to stick up for me. Ramona is a hypocrite. She says "talking behind people's back" as if she doesn't? The entire show is about us living our lives and then talking to the camera and sharing our real feelings. Is that gossip or a TV show? Ramona has said horrible things behind my back too. What's good for the goose is good for the gander. At least I own it. She admits to putting her foot in her mouth, and her opening line says it all, "If people can't handle the truth, it's really not my problem." When Ramona said she didn't have a problem with anyone I almost threw up. When talking about Cindy she said "I don't have a problem with her"! No of course you don't Ramona. You just say and do whatever you want. Then when she doesn't like the reaction? She attacks. She should realize that her actions cause reactions.

Ramona has a pattern of doing this and has done it to all of us at one time or another. Ramona likes to pick fights out of nowhere. Why did she attack me at her party in front of her guests? Was time of the essence? Why wouldn't she let Jennifer tell me to my face what she told Ramona? I'll tell you why. It was because she knew that they set me up and Jennifer could lie behind my back, but not lie to my face. She talks out of both sides of her mouth. First she tells LuAnn "I don't want to talk behind Jill's back," but then she talks behind MY BACK with Jennifer. Hypocrite?

Ramona said she would talk to me before our trip. I did tell Luann I didn't want to go anywhere, with anyone, without at least resolving past issues and starting with a clean slate. I felt really good that I had made up with Alex. We agreed that anything we did or said about each other before that day we would forgive and start over. I can honestly say that I have tried to get along with Alex and not had any conflicts.

Thank you to Teri Jon (Ricky Freeman) for hosting my first annual Anti-Bullying Charity Event. You have a huge heart and you are an amazing designer. Also, to Christina DeSimone, my dear friend. Christina started People Reaching Out, appropriately named to raise money for various charities. I asked her to help me with this event. It was so much work, and I couldn't have done it without her.

I was so happy my mom, Aunt Cookie, my sister Lisa, and Allyson came to support me that day. My very special step daughter, Jennifer Zarin, made me so proud. Jennifer has her masters degree and is a Life Coach. She started a Facebook page called The Birthmark Project. I hope people who connected to Jennifer and to what we are trying to do will LIKE her page. You can contact Jennifer through Facebook.

I was so overwhelmed after her speech. When Ramona came over to me and said "you didn't notice her face is deformed," I didn't know what to say. Now I know why Kelly won't let her around her children. Can you imagine if Jennifer heard that? (Of course she did now.) I am embarrassed by her behavior. My mother always told me you become more of who you are when you get older. Ramona becoming more "Ra-mean-a" every week.

I need to address the Darren/Ramona wine issue. It really was like a game of Telephone. I told Darren to do something. He may not have done exactly what I asked, and we got a different result. As far as I knew, I asked my assistant to get items to auction. I told Darren to contact all the girls to see if they wanted to promote their products. The caterer ordered colorful martinis (which we paid for!) but most of the guests drank soft drinks and water since it was 11 am when it began. If we needed wine for the party, we would have asked for 10 cases for 100 people (30 bottles to fill glasses on the table and have a one glass refill). I would have sent a car service to pick it up as I picked up all of the other fabulous donations including the four night stay at Canyon Ranch, ReVive Skin Care, METHOD, Lucille Roberts Bags with gift certificates to the products, bedding from Zarin Fabrics, a Lord and Taylor $50 gift card, and various other donations from my friends.

Obviously there was a misunderstanding. I asked the girls to donate something so I could promote their brand. I knew Ramona's wine was coming out this spring and we called her to give her a platform to promote it on the TV show. That is what friends do. Friends show up at each others events, which I did weeks before, and put each others products in goodie bags or silent auctions (did you hear me mention LuAnn's CD on the show?). Rather than waste it filling glasses, since many guests weren't drinking alcohol, I asked her to set it up on the silent auction table. Either way, once I asked her not to serve it she should have said "fine." Darren was wrong. I told her that. She went behind my back and did what she wanted anyway. The caterer was upset. They didn't have enough wine glasses and were serving out of martini glasses.

I have always supported the ladies any way I can. If one of us has success, we all succeed. I have gone to more book signings and product launches than I can remember. In fact, Bobby and I were the only ones at Ramona's wine event last week on the Upper East Side. Alex had just left, but no one else came. I was there. I am always there. Ramona and I have a complicated friendship, and if things fester too long it gets worse. We need to resolve this. I don't hate Ramona. I just hate some of the things she says or does to hurt me or the people I love.

Of course Ramona's rudeness is not exclusive to Jennifer. When she said "they don't respect women in Morocco" regarding our upcoming trip, it made me cringe. Here she is gossiping behind the backs of all male Moroccans. Morocco is not Iran or Saudi Arabia. Her ignorance is no longer a viable excuse. Wait until you see what happens when we actually get there!

I have to say Ramona and I have always had a strange relationship but something always keeps us connected. This too shall pass...I hope.

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You can find me live-tweeting next Thursday night so follow me on Twitter (@JillZarin) and watch some home videos on my Facebook. I can't wait to hear from all of you! In the end we raised money and awareness for a very worthy issue.

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