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Heather reacts to the "Singer Stinger" attack.

By Heather Thomson

Personality quirks tend to show themselves when you spend a lot of time with the same people. It’s our third day in London, the jet lag is raging for the ladies, and the smallest disagreements can create mini flare ups, so I am doing my best to douse them.

And, speaking of water…

Sonja’s ice-water bidet trick is certainly a way to cool off! But it’s not a facial tip I am going to be testing out anytime soon! LOL! I only wanted to help save her hair from getting wet from the repeated dunking, but I could barely hold on! She just cracks me up…

Face Full of Ass Water
While we were in London, Sonja suggested a friendly game of croquet. I love the outdoors so I was happy to partake! Knowing Sonja however, I didn’t expect our instructor would be quite so long in the tooth. But her man was feisty! You wouldn’t have guessed it, but after trying to bubble us up, he was really flirting a bit with the ladies! I confess, we didn’t learn much about croquet but definitely had some laughs, even while the flare up between the royals was ensuing…

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Congratulations to Carole on her big win in Great Gatsby style!

Pulling up to the restaurant for dinner that evening, a heated discussion began between Sonja and LuAnn about who would walk into the restaurant first. I could not believe they were actually discussing that! Seriously? I was thinking, “Who cares?”
But they both care! So when the front door opened and LuAnn grabbed my hand and started to pull me out in front with her, I thought, “Ah, no way!” I must say, she was dynamite in that red dress and she deserved her entrance in it, but I don’t like to be in-between two Housewives, if you know what I mean. (I’ve ruffled enough of Ramona’s feathers and wasn’t messing with Lady Morgan’s plumes!) So I pulled Lu back (as a gentle reminder) and we walked in shoulder to shoulder. But Sonja still noticed, and she was annoyed. At dinner the one-upmanship continued with the princess now in the mix, and it escalated to comical levels! LOL! There was edge from Carole, but she owns her immaturity, and she was just having some fun poking at LuAnn, but LuAnn didn’t understand where it was coming from. So when Sonja and Carole went to the ladies room, I tried to have an aside with Lu. I wanted to clue her in about what she was doing to annoy the other ladies, and the effect it was having on them, but I didn’t do a very good job. I was being too indirect talking about the conversation in the car and the competitive nature of the women, and it went right over her head. So much for me as mediator! But all titles aside -- the Princess, the Countess, and M’Lady Morgan -- each of these ladies are fabulous in their own right, and I hope they’ll share the stage.

Dealing with the One Upper
With a subject change in order, Sonja switches up the conversation to her concerns regarding the planning of Aviva and Reid’s anniversary party and her worries about her toaster oven prototype. She is terribly concerned about the linens and the china all matching and the seating arrangements, so I was thinking this is a major sit down feast and was growing concerned for her. So I try to get her focused on the party only, and LuAnn asks her if she is asking for our help -- I offered to go to help her when we touchdown Stateside, but in the end Sonja never asserts this to happen and the first Sonja in the City official party is about to kick off back in New York.

Upon arrival to Aviva and Reid’s party, my husband Jon and I saw the beautiful flowers, which were unbelievable, and the huge cake, which was off the hook, but we didn’t see where the sit-down dinner I had assumed was taking place was going to be. I soon recognized that Sonja solved that problem, and instead of a sit down turned it into a casual cocktail party with a buzzing vibe, with the focus on the entertainment and the speeches. Words cannot describe the performance…it was so wrong that it actually became good entertainment! Wrong genre, wrong venue, wrong guests of honor, but we still talk about it, so again, Sonja did her job and put on a memorable event for Aviva and Reid’s 5th anniversary -- mission accomplished!
An Awkward Performance
Everyone had a nice time, except of course Ramona, with her “Singer Stinger” out once again. Ramona takes a lovely introduction and turns it, starting in on me with the same ol’ same ol’ again. With the same tired argument that lacks any real substance, she tries her best to burn me up with her cruel insults. Doesn’t she know the saying? Sticks and stones may break my bones… and I am not biting. I am actually bored with her antics and find her ridiculous at this point. I cannot even help but smile -- because it’s laughable! What becomes apparent to me this time around, however, is Ramona’s modus operandi of dropping a bomb and then walking away, so you don’t have a fair opportunity to comment. This is not something I will tolerate. I will not be dismissed, and so I follow her. I deserve a fair chance to straighten out her misgivings -- I am not spending an ounce of my energy “talking behind Ramona’s back,” it’s very much out in the open that we don’t groove, and for some reason what I continue to do is to invest my time trying to give her the benefit of the doubt, again! If I can’t calm her down with a gulp of her Pinot so that I can even come close to getting that point across, then I am certain I can give her something of substance to be annoyed about by following her around with my very best, gleaming pageant smile!
The Fighting Gets Better and Better

Carole’s immaturity is rubbing off on me and I have to admit, it is kinda fun!

Thanks for reading and thank you for all of the great feedback you keep sending my way! To learn more about me and my shapewear business, go to Facebook,, and And don’t forget to follow me on Twitter @iamheathert.

Have a yummie week!

xx. Heather
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