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Heather: It's Clear I Was Getting Frustrated

Heather explains her own harsh attitude during Dorinda's birthday dinner.

By Heather Thomson

Wow, I’m usually much more chill and relaxed in the Berkshires!
It is my family sanctuary away from the grind of the city, where my husband and children and I get back to our roots. My husband and I bought a magnificent piece of property, and we are growing our family and our bond and making so many memories. On this front, I have nothing in the world to complain about...But this weekend is not like most, and it is never is with some of these chiquitas!

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Dorinda’s house is special, and I love the history of it for her with her father. I’ve met him, and he himself is special. There is so much history in the Berkshires, and the architectural history has always fascinated me. During America’s Gilded Age (1865-1901) our country saw unprecedented economic growth and prosperity, allowing some of the nation’s wealthiest families to construct these massive estates. Approximately 75 of them are in the Berkshires, including: The Wheatleigh, Ventfort Hall Mansion, and The Mount. You can read more about these amazing historical homes here. I grew up just miles away from many of these "Berkshire Cottages," and they are probably a good part of my drive! LOL. The Berkshires is such a great part of America’s history as well as mine. It’s a pretty cool pace to visit, and I encourage you to check it out.

(The Wheatleigh) 

(Ventfort Hall Mansion)

(The Mount)

Speaking of historical spots in the Berkshires, the Red Lion Inn (built in 1773), is where my husband and I got engaged! And also where one of my dear childhood friends Brian Alberg hails as executive chef. Normally dinner at the Red Lion is special, but immediately the group started discussing Bethenny and all the usual topics…custody arrangements, her childhood, and opinions on her friendships and her integration into the group, or lack thereof, and the mood changed. It’s clear I was getting frustrated with the context of the conversation, and I can admit to being tough and having an irreverence for bullsh--, but I was not attempting to "compare" people’s struggles. I was not comparing one particular problem with another (but thanks for the tip, Countess). My point was that everyone has different issues, and at any given time they can be less or they can be more. And although I may have enough eye rolls in this episode to fill a sequel to The Heathers, I am not a judgmental person and certainly not unsympathetic to people’s challenges, misfortunes, mishaps, or sh--ty deals. That is for damn sure. Life has tough breaks, and unfortunately some of us have it worse than others, and some better, but circumstances can change in the blink of an eye... Everyone is entitled to a bad day, a good cry, and the absolute right to feel sorry for ourselves. And, we all are also entitled to a good hug, a good friend, a good turn of events and some good luck! I like to stay of the mind-set that life is good, and mostly, it is what you make of it.

Why Does Everyone Cut Bethenny So Much Slack?

In Downtown Great Barrington, we’re visiting a lot of the shops I frequent. While at Twigs, Ramona and Luann are finding their peace among the yummie denim and bras! Carole and Sonja are offending Dorinda with vibrators at Bra and Girl, and Kristen and I are in Louisa Ellis scarfing up yummie active and goodcharma jewelry--and this is my kind of fun!

I was looking forward to my husband Jon’s arrival and Kristen’s husband Josh’s, too! This evening was all about a dressed-up dinner for Dorinda’s birthday. She loves a dressed-up dinner party, so fancy was the dress code, and it’s fun! Our sushi chef was Michael Marcus, a friend for so many years, and the proprietor of my favorite restaurant in Great Barrington, Bizen. Michael prepared a delicious multi-course sushi tasting/sake pairing for the evening and, knowing Michael, it’s going to be over the top. He's the only Jewish sushi chef I know, and P.S. he also makes all of the pottery his service is set in. Unfortunately, things took a turn rather quickly after Bethenny's arrival. It started with Bethenny’s reaction to us recognizing she had fish allergies after surprising us for dinner. Considering her announcement about not eating fish and knowing there was a sushi service on deck with the probability of nothing for her to eat, first Dorinda, and then I, were simply trying to suggest alternative options. No one was trying to get a rundown of her dietary preferences!

Heather, You're Not Bethenny's Mother

While you can be sure that I am over Bethenny's rules, deliveries, and rude behavior, in dealing with her at this point, my own attitude has become harsh. I am completely sensitive to food allergies, given my own son's struggles with them, and I could never have expected such a severe reaction...instead of a normal conversation about an allergy to fish, Bethenny, snaps at us to ignore it. SO, maybe a normal conversation with Ramona's partner about his restaurant businesses is a novel idea? Nope. Instead I come across bitchy while trying to shout over Sonja and Bethenny's cackles and my “inside jokes” are dropping like lead balloons. I suck, and he feels like he's being grilled, yikes! Now B and I are back at it, and it’s like a bad ping pong match between Cruella De Ville and Maleficent, or am I caught in Once Upon a Time...?

AHHHHHH! I can see how upset Bethenny is getting, and I am out of my own skin, so I try to take her aside in an attempt to salvage things privately. This is obviously not about the meatballs! As much as I like to grab a bull by its horns, I also know when to call uncle, but I'm not having a good time with it or doing a particularly good job at any of it right now...on any level.

Bethenny Wants the Wall Up

Stay tuned…

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xo,
Heather

 

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