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I’m writing you from Ibiza, Spain, an island in the Mediterranean Sea, known for its electronic dance music and artist community. I’m vacationing with great friends and enjoying the fabulous nightlife. So I’m going to keep this brief.
We join you from the Turks and Caicos “f--- you dinner” where Dorinda reached her dirty martini limit. Heather being her usual bossy self, shooed Dorinda from the table so they could resolve their issues alone. Ramona followed the girls into the bathroom and basically forced a hug on Dorinda and that’s when Heather got all gangsta on her so she would leave. I think Heather intimidated Ramona into backing off, and I believe Ramona when she said she felt scared. They seemed to put it all behind them fairly quickly and when Heather and Carole decided to skip going to the club after dinner, I wasn’t disappointed to see them go. I went out with Ramona and Sonja to a karaoke bar, and we had the best time! We invited some lovely English gentlemen back to the house for drinks, and we were having so much fun we didn’t want the night to end...if you know what I mean!
The next morning, the sh-- hit the fan in our villa when Heather stumbled naked into the bathroom and discovered one of our friends from the night before sleeping au naturel! I had no idea that Ramona let her friend sleep upstairs. Thank God I sent mine home. That’s a first! The man wasn’t in Heather’s bedroom; he was in another room separated by a bathroom! Poor Dorinda didn’t make it down the stairs before being accosted by Heather and her sidekick Carole, whose reaction was over the top. Dorinda hadn’t had a chance to put her contacts in, never mind process what happened the night before. Then the hysterical duo decided to confront Ramona, and she, as usual, punted the problem off to me!
Heather and Carole then barged into my room, yelling about our overnight houseguest. They may have knocked, but I can assure you, they didn’t wait for an answer before running into my room. I could have been swinging from a chandelier with a guy on my back for all they knew! Instead, they found just me, tired from a really fun night, but it could have ended up differently. I was angry that they didn’t respect my privacy. I’m single, and I can do what I like with whom I like, and it’s none of their business. Once I arose and came out to the kitchen for a much-needed caffeine jolt, Heather launched into me again and that was when I’d had enough of her histrionics and told her, “Don’t be all uncool.” We were on vacation, and I’m not married or in a serious relationship. As for the man I was flirting with being married, I can assure you his marriage vows are still intact!
After we returned from our trip, which Ramona rated a 10 out of 10 (and I agree), I headed out to the Hamptons to chill out and relax. These trips are a lot of fun, but I needed a vacation from my vacation when we got back. After recharging, I headed back into the city to attend Kristen’s Denim and Diamonds jean decorating party. As you can see, although I was enjoying decorating my jeans, I was still angry with the girls for barging into my room on our vacation. I couldn’t believe it when I confronted Heather and told her that Carole apologized to me that Carole, when asked, denied doing so. I assure you, Carole apologized for invading my privacy. My problem is that neither Heather nor Carole feel like they did anything wrong. Heather and Carole broke the Girl Code that morning in Turks and Caicos and after I said my piece, I was done. I decided to leave the girls to their jeans and their drama.
Until next week, don’t break the #GirlCode!
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