Well as you can see from this episode, Kelly and I really started our new friendship off nicely and organically. We had a mutual friend so we had that in common when we first met which made it easy. It was nice to see Kelly tell the ladies at Meghan's house how sad I was and that I felt left out by them. I am hopeful that they will understand how hurtful and damaging this whole situation has been for me from last year and I really want to move on. I don't want to talk about "him" anymore and I would hope they would understand I just want to move on as best as possible. There is a lot that you the viewers don't know as well as the ladies, and I have decided instead of to keep feeding them with information, I'm choosing to put it in my past.
I think it was wrong and childish for any of the ladies to try and influence Kelly not to be friends with me. I mean what, are we five years old on the playground? I can't help to think how any of them would feel if that was done to them. Kelly is a big girl and she can be friends with whomever she wants to.
Kelly didn't know anything about my previous relationship, so when I told her about what I went through with not only the ladies but with "him," she had compassion for me. I mean who in their lifetime hasn't been betrayed by someone? All of us have.
Unfortunately, mine was on TV which magnified it even more. Last year was one of the hardest years of my life and I can't believe at times that I made through it. Losing my mom, and the betrayal of "him" all within a few months really brought me to my knees. I think we all can look back in our lives and remember the times that we struggled either in a personal relationship, a work relationship or financially. I think those times are handed to us to make us stronger, a little more wiser and definitely more humble. This allows us to appreciate when the chaos ends and peace returns. That's where I'm at now. I can finally say I am at peace and once again feeling joy. I've been dating a special man for the past two months and yes, we are taking it very slow but it's nice to feel cared for and appreciated. These past 10 months being alone have been really good for me, because I have been able to focus on my career, my children and my grandchildren with no distractions and to focus on what I do want and what I don't want for the remainder of my life.
Starting a new friendship with Kelly was good for me. Although I have a lot of friends that you won't ever see on TV, this group of ladies are very special to me and it's important to me that we can mend some of the hurt that is there. As you will see as the season progresses, we were able to get back to some sense of normalcy and resume having fun together again. Some of the ladies were ok with moving on, some others "not so much" which I am fine with. Staying in a negative mindset is not something I want to be a part of nor do I want in my life anymore. It's too toxic.
I felt bad for Tamra when Eddie was talking to her about financially helping Ryan out. It reminded me when I was married to Donn and his viewpoint regarding my kids and assisting them financially. He never understood it and it was always a fight. Both Donn and Eddie don't have any children of their own, so I don't think they will ever understand the love and responsibility we have for our kids the way we do (no matter what their age is). With Ryan moving back in the area, if Tamra wanted to help him out I think that's her choice. No matter how old your kids are, if you as a parent choose to help them out then so be it. Eddie seemed very agitated with Tamra and very angry about it. I wonder how Ryan felt when he saw that.
I really enjoyed having the Chamber of Commerce networking meeting at my Coto Insurance office. For those of you that used to watch RHOC years ago, back in 2008 I held a networking mixer at Jeana's house and when I was done speaking I fell off her steps in the backyard. Can you believe that was already eight years ago? I laughed when I saw that on this episode as it feels like only a few years ago. If you have a small business, I think it's very important to be part of a networking organization as that's where a lot of my business relationships and friendships were made here in Orange County.
It was nice seeing Terry and Heather in Turks and Caicos on their family vacation. Terry has a lot on his plate with three TV shows and his practice, I know how hard it is to slow down to take time for the kids and family. I have been guilty of doing the same from time to time so I have to force myself to look at the big picture and enjoy the family as much as I can. I'm proud that he took the time for the family, as those memories can never be erased from the kids' minds.
Hope you enjoyed these first two episodes. Lots more to come.
Have a Happy and Safe Fourth of July.